I'm offensive in large doses.

I enjoy a good run with sharp objects.

I am an artist. I do like to draw in my spare time and I like to play on my guitars and come up with cool new sounds. I've loved every class I've ever taken that dealt with just drawing in a studio. Of course, I don't really think people who focus completely on this sort of thing have a clue what they're doing with their lives, but it's a great way to get rid of stress. However, I do find the carefree, hippie-artist stereotype to be quite appealing. I suppose it's almost like an antagonistic complement to my character. I'm also into photography a little bit.
I love to cook! Sometimes I just find myself thinking about what would go well together in a pan or how I might better thicken a particular sauce. I also love going to the grocery store and just walking down the aisles and seeing what I can find. It's like a treasure trove of culture in Publix! :D

I once read a news article about a cow made entirely of butter and had devious thoughts of screwing the cow while onlookers looked on horrified. I then imagined myself with a satisfied smile and pointing at the cow saying "I can't believe it's not butter!" <--You've got a good sense of humor if you get this joke. And, yes, I really had this thought.

I am a gamer. I love to play video games and just 'veg' out for a few hours. I take some of it pretty seriously, but I'm not the World of Warcraft type gamer. I have tried it and it's a waste of one's life in my opinion. I love to play just about any genre, however, and I'm always looking for more people to play with, although I do have a pretty close-knit, elite group of friends online.

I am a biker. I love Hayabusas. That being said I also love other bikes as well, but I'm not so interested in Harleys. I think they are over-commercialized and too stereotypical of low-income, low-intelligence rednecks with huge belt buckles and a healthy deficiency in vocabulary vitamins.

I love computers. I love to customize my desktop and think about my next build. I like to build computers and talk about them. I'm pretty geeky about this. And trust me my computer is completely custom and completely assembled by me. If you're interested I will gladly bore you with the details! *Rubs hands together like an evil genius*

I've been going to the gym now for the past few months and doing a pretty good job of it so far minus getting sick or some other thing that might come up I still find myself returning. :D

I am currently working as a logistics broker and avoiding post-grad work. I also do IT work for my company and a little extra-curricular computer repair for some money on the side.

Learning to play guitar hero with my roommate, who is amazing at it.

Running through ideas for new businesses that might make me rich so I can retire early.

Considering going back to school for Law.

A good topic starter...

I've been told that people have no idea I'm intelligent until well after they've met me. Maybe that says more than enough.

However, I'm not usually told anything. I've been told I have a radio voice at work. I work on the phone quite a bit.

I've been told I'm fat. (How's that for honest?)

I've been told I'm cute. I have nice hair or have nice eyes (I disagree on the eyes and don't really care about my hair).

I should survey some people.

I read "history" books mostly. Things that expound on sociology, philosophy, religion, etc.
Friedrich Nietzsche's "On the Genealogy of Morals" and Thomas Paine's "Common Sense." I have been reading the Count of Monte Christo recently and it's an excellent book. I do read Mein Kampf from time to time simply because it's relative to what I like to study in History (Weimar Germany). "The Prince" was rather long and slightly boring, but interesting still. I like to read travel books, but mostly just ones pertaining to Europe.

I just realized that it doesn't ask you about television shows or anything like that. I can pretty much watch anything but I love the Simpsons, Family Guy, South Park, Smallville, Highlander, Gilligan's Island, I dream of Jeannie, Bewitched, That 70's Show, The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, and most of the stuff on the History Channel and the Food Network. Robot Chicken is definitely in there. How I met Your Mother is one of my favorite shows as well! :D Barney is hilarious. Cartman is probably one of my few idols. "Just give him half." "These aren't pirates; these are just black people." The list goes on. He is hilarious. mmmmm Tears of unfathomable sadness.. mmm yummy!!!

Recently I found I like "The IT Crowd." Funny little British show.

Movies would be epics like Lord of the Rings and Star Wars generally. I also love comedies and horror movies.

I have a ton of music on my computer. :)

My music taste really just depends on my mood at the time. I love Disturbed, Godsmack, Coldplay, Staind, Metallica, Guns, Led Zeppelin, Eagles, M20, 3EB, Oasis, 112, Nelly, Tim McGraw, Garth, Hank, Kid Rock, Rammstein, 7ieben, Sha, Kansas, Eric Clapton, Crossfade, Saving Abel ... Too many to list seriously. Tenacious D is hilarious and should be mentioned.

I think it would be easier to list the music I can't stand: Fleetwood Mac (Stevie Nix sounds like a goat), Thin Lizzy and Busta Rhymes. I hate the "Sweet Home Alabama" knock-off by Kid Rock (yes I like Kid Rock, but he should be harmed for this song). I can't stand the "Soulja boy." Someone needs to beat him profusely with a bat. The "banana" song by Gwen Stefani. She should be placed in a third-world prison for that song.
The "milli a milli a milli" song. Anyone involved with that song should be skull-humped and molested by a traveling minstrel band.

1. My sanity.
Or perhaps I've already lost it? That would kind of nullify the need, right?

2. Zotz--those little delicious candies with the "fizz" in the middle. They're awesome. I wish they were in more places.

3. Old people. They're hilarious. They're so naturally funny like yellow snow. I can't wait until I'm old. However, I firmly believe they don't need driver's licenses. I've seen way too many of them cause problems in traffic and, yes, I've been hit by one of them. That sealed it for me.

4. Irony. It's the best kind of comedy.

5. Olive oil. It's just great to cook with.

6. Guys on Mopeds. I laugh every time.

Why am I still around Albany, GA? Am I going to be schizophrenic by the time I'm 25? Am I already schizophrenic? Am I delusional? Am I in denial? What did that lady do to my hair!!!!!?

Why the hell do so many people care about what other people are doing? You think gays shouldn't marry? I'm not exactly a fag-lover or anything, but I damn sure don't go out and say "No, fag, you can't get married!" Why would I give a shit? And, of course, I think now "Well someone must be offended by me using the word fag." Why do you give a shit? Why don't you take your hippie ass and hug a tree.

Let's keep going shall we? This is an adventure! Umm, no I don't give a shit if you're a vegetarian or a vegan nor do I give a shit why you became one. Yes, I think PETA should self-destruct and send the first tree-huggers into space. At the same time I think that corporations should be responsible and moral in their treatment of everything--that means don't try to intentionally destroy the environment. I'm not asking for much. Just don't be a dick.

On to the conservative, right-wing Christians! GO FUCK YOURSELF. Wow, you're probably thinking "But you seemed so much like us." No, no, no. You're quite mistaken. I don't want to read another page about how your first love is Jesus Christ. I don't want to hear your brainwashed language about how your visit to Africa changed your life and how you want to do more missionary work. I don't care! You are blind. You are deaf. And unfortunately you've been fed bullshit too long to do anything about it. Religion--the best self-replicating, propaganda machine that man has ever invented!

Back to my right-wing side. I like my guns. Yes I own guns. Yes I've been hunting. It was mostly just me sitting in a tree stand with my rifle though. Could have killed a few things, but I haven't yet. I was more interested in taking pictures and listening to my tunes than shooting little furry creatures.

I am pro-military, but that doesn't mean bomb everything to bits. Military doesn't just mean tanks, soldiers, planes, guns, etc. It means diplomacy, a strong economy, and making allies. Unfortunately most right-wing people are too blind to see that. Most left-wing people lack the backbone to use the "military" side of diplomacy. That's right. I said it. Military force is a form of diplomacy. Nothing says I'm right like a bomb in your ass! Let's call it Military Affirmation of Sovereignty.

Ooh. Abortion. Definitely for it. For many reasons and I don't care if you disagree. Yes, yes I know. You had an abortion or you almost had one and changed your mind. Very nice. I respect your choice. Did you consider having an IQ test before you had sex? No? Okay, well I don't respect your parents' choice to not have an abortion.

Old people really don't need licenses. I don't care about your argument here either. I've been rear-ended by an old woman that went into a diabetic shock. I've also almost been backed into--as a pedestrian--by an old man that never saw me. I gave him a very polite finger considering the situation.

I think more guys should open doors for women. No, I don't care that it is a sign of patriarchal tradition. My mother didn't raise me that way. As a Southerner I consider it a sign of homage and respect to the person behind you to hold the door for them and that really includes men too. However, there are rules for all that... not getting into details.

I wonder what deal is going to be on Steam this weekend? What about Direct2drive? I really love to check the weekly deals on publix.com.

Maybe I'm already losing my mind... there certainly is a lot of self-dialog in this box...

It varies to tell the truth.

I wonder how great an idea it is to tell people so much on here so quickly. I think many people--especially me--are best taken like antibiotics. Take me in doses on a regular schedule! How can you absorb everything that is -me- in a few paragraphs?

I think you should read my profile backwards. Backwards profile my read should you think I.

Can I really list criteria? Pssh. What a waste of time. You won't message me anyway. In fact, I challenge you to message me. Just send me a short "ha! I sent you a message." I'll reply. I assure you. :P Be sure to include my promotional code.

To date one person has responded!