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28 Portland, OR Woman


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18-100
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 3:23pm
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
5' 6" (1.68m)
Body Type
Average build
Special Diet
Atheism and laughing about it
Doesn’t want kids
Has cats
English (Fluently), Japanese (Fluently), Russian (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Here for friendship.
Yep, that's right.


I don't believe much: most opinions on media and cultural trends are little more than just that, most beliefs are biased, and most moral concepts are reflections of their time. I do deeply believe that living beings should be hurt as little as possible; essentially all other beliefs are as shaky as a little kid's baby teeth.

My friend's intestines are falling out. It's OK. I'll push them back in.

...didn't work.

I am at once idealistic and dark-humored. I am very logical and emotional. I treasure honesty and authenticity. I am honest to a literal fault. I aim to always repay kindness and keep promises, but remain fallible. I can come off very intense and impassioned, but my underlying mindset is generally calm, half-joking, and open to complete change. I am not to be taken too seriously. George Carlin said of life, "napalm and silly putty," which very.

I'm pretty much up for any activity, except for interacting directly with many different people, forming chiefly shallow, temporal relationships to sate the desire for social interaction. Clearly, I like philosophical discussions. I also love magic tricks, singing, stuffed animals, new experiences, hiking, wandering, all kinds of games (basketball? Tetris? poker? Candy Land? laser tag? Yes), big shaggy dogs, lace, being shocked, snowy days, road trips, Christmas, jokes, new music, sweets, things. I'm the sort of person who gets way too excited about, say, air hockey. And I will murder you. Sallow wretch.

As concerns friends, I will consider all applications, but I will note that I like older women. Well, and older men, provided they aren't skeezy. I like--I LIKE OLD PEOPLE, okay?!
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I don't know, most of us don't, don't pretend you do, your job doesn't count, hanging with friends doesn't count, what are you doing even.

That said, I'm a freelance Japanese translator, high-end fashion shipping middleman to Japan, fringe erotica writer, and nonprofit campaigner.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
War and Peace, The Red and the Black, Lies My Teacher Told Me, Mademoiselle de Maupin, Alice Through the Looking-Glass, Lolita, The Adventures of Ingenious Alfanhui, Where the Red Fern Grows, 1984, The Patchwork Girl of Oz, Calvin & Hobbes, Amphigorey, Little Nemo in Wonderland, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane, Trekways of the Wind, The Little Prince, Tuck Everlasting, A Little Princess, The Neverending Story, Breakfast of Champions, Lizzie Bright and the Buckminster Boy, the Tao Te Ching

Roald Dahl is my favorite author. My favorites are filled with children's books because children's books are much more exuberant, less focused on faking non-artifice, and have higher quality standards than adults' books. (Pre-Potterism, which caused the YA focus on books that can be made into blockbusters to infect younger children's books in turn.) I'm an amateur authority on fairy tales and children's books. My favorite fairytale is a tie between Bluebeard (moreso the opera version with its pool of tears) and The Snow Queen. I often like but don't love adult novels; Ahab's Wife, Neuromancer, and The Picture of Dorian Grey are just a few that for whatever reason I don't want to list as favorites.

"One may enter the literary parlor via just about any door, be it the prison door, the madhouse door, or the brothel door. There is but one door one may not enter it through, which is the child room door. The critics will never forgive you such. The great Rudyard Kipling is one of a number of people to have suffered from this. I keep wondering to myself what this peculiar contempt towards anything related to childhood is all about." - Michael Ende (The Neverending Story)

I have very few long-term musical artist favorites. Cocorosie is a very strong first.

The Indelicates, Clammbon, Stromae, Cairokee

Please let me know if you know of any other bands with a message, like The Indelicates, Immortal Technique, Cairokee, Rage Against the Machine, X-Clan, etc.

A Thousand Clowns, Alien, Snowpiercer, Harvey (1950), Gladiator, The Fall, Anastasia, Survive Style 5+, Treasure Planet, Cloud Atlas, A Clockwork Orange, Whiplash, Big Hero 6, Hamlet (Kenneth Branagh), Hugo, The Fifth Element, Princess Mononoke, The Wolf of Wall Street, Wizard People Dear Reader, The Iron Giant, Edge of Tomorrow, Grosse Pointe Blank, Withnail and I, True Romance, Hedwig and the Angry Inch, The Shadow, The Painted Veil, Snatch, Leon: The Professional, Pan's Labyrinth, The Shining, 3:10 to Yuma, Harold and Maude, Serenity, The Crucible

[play a level of my favorite game for free!]
I could list a lot of nostalgic things, but right now actually I just have Hearthstone, Starcraft II, Portal 2, DDR, and Torchlight II anywhere on my radar.

Stewart Lee, Louis C.K., Donald Glover, [many others]
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I'm gonna use this space to explain my username.

When I first joined OKC, it was back when it was an experiment by the people behind Daenerys was an obscure name, and OKC was a funny, well-designed site populated by oddballs. Like, Chris Coyne messaged me asking about my dragon eggs, and that was really cool because he got it. Now, HBO has made A Song of Ice and Fire into an infamous sex-violence drama, and OKC is owned by

I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.

I have been thinking about this recently, by which I mean just now so a good ol' Michio Kaku-style what the hey: when someone chooses to do something they believe is morally good, like working for a charity or becoming vegan, other people seem to feel that they deserve LESS understanding and have LESS room to complain. (This is true even if the person in question displays no pride, arrogance, or holier-than-thou attitude.) Such treatment is completely backwards and very telling about how we as a society think about doing good. When it comes to vague concepts about how humans should be, we're all for it; but when we encounter someone actually trying to carry it out, we question their life choices, their dedication, their purity, and their right to suffer. We're much more likely to empathize with someone who has a complaint about a hard day at the generic office than someone who's volunteered to help at a homeless shelter. There's a subconscious push to martyrdom: helping others and doing good should be hard, and you should suffer, or else you're impure and doing it wrong. I don't know if this is human nature or just a religiously-influenced mindset, but we must change the way we think about people who strive for morality with their actions. It should be enjoyable to help. People should be applauded. People should be allowed to feel prouder of a good moral choice than of making a great sales pitch, not made to feel that any pride is out of place. Our society should positively reinforce high morality, not punish it.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I've decided, based on the massive number of profiles that mention these topics, to just put this right out here.

Desperately seeking individually-minded persons with logical capabilities. If you are part of a cult, you can message me and we can even be friends. I don't mind crazy people. Most people are religious and I don't tell them to go away. But if you want me to regularly listen to your cultish ranting on hot-button alternative topics you've been taught to rant about that compel you to use phrases like "cis," "ew a straight white male kill it with scorn," and "ism-ism," I expect to be paid.

...seriously though, I'm open to persuasion. I like gender role breakdowns; just the pronoun thing and various elements of social justice seem idiotic and counter-productive. If you can logically defend the rightness of it I will be convinced, but more probably you will lose and have to give some kind of lame Christianesque excuse, like, "This movement is better than nothing though," or, "Nature put biological gender differences there to test our faith."

If you've made it this far, but you're heartily opposed to what I am saying here, I would appreciate you messaging me. Let's hear what you got.

Otherwise, some items for you to focus your young passion and rage on in a more productive manner:

Addendum: Counter-counteractive white males who are pissed off that people are now targeting them, and so increasingly drawing erroneous conclusions about "suppressed realities" concerning race, gender, the Holocaust, the Middle East, etc.: you, too, are cultish and cherry-pick in your oh-so-daring research, but your aim is immediately and directly selfish rather than subconsciously so, and so you may fuck off a little harder.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Do iiit.