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43 F Raleigh, NC

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Dropped out of space camp
Science / Engineering
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
Has kids
Has dogs and has cats
English (Okay)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
It's challenging to effectively capture or portray someone's personality via text alone, so here are some attributes, and short descriptors, that help describe me.

Affectionate - I like to cuddle, and physical contact is important
Intelligent - I like to figure things out and discuss complexities
Delicate - I can be hurt. I do like to be cared for
Extroverted - I enjoy time with people
Creative - I often have ideas about things, or how to improve things
Romantic - Little cute things can mean the world to me
Passionate - I pour myself into what, and who, I'm interested in
Fun - I like to laugh, and I like making others laugh too
Dorky - I like silly jokes and puns and can be goofy at times
Artistic - I like to express myself through music and other art forms
Monogamous - I am a pair-bonder, and prefer 1:1 romance
Queer with Kids - I do have kids who are my priority always
Femme of center - I've some tomboy traits, but am quite girly
Switch - not just in the bedroom, I need to lead and be led some
Emotional - I have very strong feelings, about everything
Fierce - I will fight for my identity, my beliefs and my loved ones.
Sensitive - I feel. I am intuitive. I care a lot, about many things
Feminist - if you don't know why then you're the reason
Nerdy - I love scifi/fantasy type of things and can really geek out
The little spoon - metaphorically as well

What's most important to me is that we get along, chemistry, "the click", whatever you call it. So here are some of the attributes I would choose were I to design a partner:

Intelligent - you make connections, and figure things out
Affectionate - touch is important part of your communication
Emotionally honest - you are aware of your feelings
Dorky - silly and goofy at times like me
Good with kids - mine are 6 & 9 and you accept that
Artistic - you express yourself via art of some kind
Queer - have a non-binary concept of gender and orientation
Feminist - same as me but for your own reasons?
Communicator - you are proficient and enjoy conversation
Switch - you can lead, and be led, and require both.
Monogamous - you like to be the one single target of affection
Ambitious - you have desires, dreams and goals.
Sensitive - you can feel. You can also be hurt.
Creative - you're clever and have ideas about things.
Passionate - when you're into someone or something
Snuggler - you want and need close proximity and contact
The big spoon - :)
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I work with the Trans Group at the Raleigh LGBT center.

I like most sciences and love learning how things, and people, work.

Playing guitar and singing a little. Writing songs.

Parenting two kids (6,9) who live with me 50% of the time.

Learning to fight with swords and knives.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Over thinking
Over complicating
Over dressing
Under dressing
Missing cues
Improvisational rhyming
Becoming emotionally invested
Learning new things
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I haven't conducted a poll exactly, but so far I've noticed:

I'm tall.
I have multi colored hair.
I can be kinda loud and obnoxious, especially when drinking.

I have visible tattoos that often get noticed.

Apparently I'm also always moving. That's why every pic that's not a selfie is blurry.

or could it be my +3 aura of awesomeness?
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Food: No sugar, no carbs. everything else is on the menu

Books: Yes: science, sci-fi, fantasy, and gender.

Movies & Shows: I don't watch broadcast TV except for Doctor Who. I like most scifi, fantasy and Anime and crazy martial arts movies.

Music: yes lots. I have a wide range of tastes, mostly, within the greater Rock genre, some examples, in no particular order, are: The Distillers, Stars, Carbon Leaf, Misfits, The Smiths, Blood Stained Child, The Parlotones, Boom Boom Satellites, Strike Anywhere, Angels & Airwaves, Buzzcocks, The Naked & Famous, and my favorite band ever is AFI.

More important than liking the same music, is that we like music with similar intensity, and for similar reasons.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Transgender things
Social Justice things
Parental things
Musical things
Nature things
Gender things
My friends and their situations
Also: what to put after the also
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Most weekends I have my kids and I can often be found at a local Raleigh or Durham restaurant trying to keep them seated long enough to enjoy a meal and a coffee.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm actually really open. possibly too much so. Especially regarding gender issues I've no problem sharing and answering questions. Once I know and trust you, I don't really have a TMI line.

I have a weird thing where sometimes my skin is like screaming out to be touched...but only someone special can do it.

I am the dragon from Shrek: I really just want to get flowers, be pretty, and lay on your lap while you play with my hair; but also I will rip out your lungs and set fire to all that you know.
I’m looking for
  • Guys and girls who like bi girls
  • Ages 27–45
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
-You're a gender non conforming queer seeking long term pair-bonding and adorableness
-You think I'm reasonably attractive or interesting or both
-You are reasonably attractive or interesting or both
-You are dorky and/or socially awkward
-You like AFI
-You want to start a trans/queer punk band
-You were sad when Yagami Light died
-You've *respectful* questions about trans or gender issues

NOTE: I identify as Pansexual in that I am attracted to all genders and presentations, for different reasons. My favorite is masculine-of-center AFAB (including butches and trans guys) but I can honestly be attracted to anyone - its the inside that matters most to me. (or as the Pansexual mantra goes: "hearts before parts")

Its also ok just to msg be about how awesome I am.
Or about how awesome you are.