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33 Berlin, Germany Man


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18-99
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Today – 11:03am
Relationship Type
5' 10" (1.77m)
Body Type
Average build
Atheism and it’s important
Working on Post grad
Doesn’t have kids
English (Fluently), German (Fluently), French (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm very rational and very emotional, and I don't consider those two qualities contradictory. I try to be open for new experiences. I am not afraid of commitment and not afraid of casual contacts either. I'm dependable, mostly punctual, generally capable of managing life, and good for nothing. I am willing and able to learn and I think making mistakes sometimes is important and even necessary, because there are things you can only learn through mistakes. I value honesty. I'm adaptable in some regards, opinionated in others, and I will sometimes grow silent and socially awkward when I feel I'm around people who are alien to me. I can talk a lot, and sometimes rather passionately, but I can also listen. I love to cuddle and to kiss and I sometimes feel lonely, but less often than I used to. When a friend of mine cries, I offer my shoulder without trying to make them stop. I try to be careful and attentive about other people's boundaries.

I care a great deal about rejecting sexism. I'm the kind of guy who would take offence if somebody called me "masculine."

I am a strong proponent of open relationships. Although I don't like the word, you could call me polyamorous. I have quite a lot to say for that, but let it suffice to mention three things: First, I don't think all that fuss about sex is in any way justified. Why can't grown-up people just have sex if they like (and refrain from it if they don't)? What harm does that do to third parties? Second, I fail to see how arbitrarily confining your partner's freedom can be a proof of love (if love is to be a good thing, that is). Third, all intimate relationships are one-of-a-kind individuals, so I really appreciate getting rid of pointless questions like "Is this really love?" or "Are we a couple?" or "Is this more than friendship?" I don't care if a relationship conforms to this or that stereotype. Relationships should be about what makes sense for the unique persons involved in their specific situation.

I never use emoticons, and I and never go swimming dressed. These two basic rules of life are the closest thing to a religion I have.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm working on my dissertation in philosophy. My field is practical philosophy, and my thesis is about metaethics in particular. So I work on questions like: What should we do? What does it even mean to ask yourself: "What should I do?" And how do we even start to figure out all such complicated stuff?

I also work part-time editing a left-wing newspaper.

I'm somewhat lazy. In fact, I see moderate laziness as a progressive virtue: What could contribute more to the general improvement of human living conditions than the continuous struggle to minimize the burden of labour?
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Sometimes I wear a skirt and/or kohl; some people tend to notice that, for some reason. Also, apparently, I tend to come across as "intense," whatever that means.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
It would be hard to name my favourite books. The list would start with Homer, and it would not contain much contemporary literature. Moby-Dick is one of the best books I've ever read. But I also loved Watchmen (the graphic novel, not the movie). As for non-fiction, I should mention my appreciation of Marx and the better parts of Marxism (notably Adorno and Horkheimer). Nietzsche is one of my favourites, too. You get the picture - I'm that annoying sort of elitist communist.

Some movies I love are Solyaris, Nausicaa, Teeth, There Will Be Blood, Bladerunner, The Godfather Part I and II, The Fountain, Gone With The Wind, Shame (2011), The Women, Alien quadrology. I appreciate the work of Akira Kurosawa, Stanley Kubrick, Sofia Coppola, Woody Allen, David Lynch, David Cronenberg, Billy Wilder, Takeshi Kitano, the Coen Brothers, Frank Capra, Howard Hawks, Mamoru Oshii. I also have a taste for "Naked Gun"-style comedy.

Some music I like: Swans, PJ Harvey, Barn Owl, Silver Mt. Zion, David Bowie, Nirvana, The Cure, The Angels of Light, Jesse Sykes, Chinawoman, Mogwai, Neurosis, Coil, The Fall, Madrugada, !!!, Nine Inch Nails, Tricky, Portishead, Massive Attack, Arcade Fire, Johnny Cash, Blur, Fever Ray, The Flaming Lips, Nick Cave, Devendra Banhart, Anna Calvi.
For dancing, I indulge in techno for the most part.
I also love Bach, Mahler, and Shostakovich, but I have to admit that as of late, I rarely find the time and interest to listen to that kind of music. Maybe this is how growing old and dull starts.
I don't like jazz. There, I said it.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
how most people seem to be living in a world that's fundamentally different from the world in which I live. And relatedly, the prevalence of delusion among humans. For example, how it is possible that apparently well-educated people still believe in things like astrology or religion? How is it possible that people vote for, or even join, the established political parties? How is it possible that most people who claim to be critical turn out to be just as bad as the people they are criticising? And how can I make sure I'm really any better, and not just full of myself?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
hopefully with someone nice and interesting. I might be out in a bar or dancing, going for a walk or to the movies, or just having a cozy evening at home.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I don't like to sleep alone. For eight years I lived with a girlfriend, so I had company most nights. When she moved out a couple of years ago, every night alone used to make me feel painfully lonely. Of course I got used to it, but I still dislike it.

I had myself circumcised a couple of years ago. Part of the reason the idea appealed to me probably was that most men here in Germany seem to be somewhat horrified by it. Must be fear of castration or something. I don't have that. Or might it be one of those "special" issues in the German collective subconscious to dread circumcision because it is thought of as Jewish? I don't have that, either.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over. would rather I messaged you first. want to write a book with me. are looking for a companion to see some movie or other at Arsenal cinema. They have a retrospective of screwball comedies in December and January!

We have a gender problem here. Many women get messaged more often than they would like to (or so I've heard) and I am not too eager to join what can hardly be perceived but as a crowd of testosterone-intoxicated spammers. Men, on the other hand, rarely get messaged. Surely this is a sexist state of affairs which each of us should strive to change!
(Of course, men are welcome to write me as well.)

*Warning!* Anyone who thinks they can unilaterally change the terms & conditions of OkCupid, or discourage any individual or institution from doing anything, by posting some made-up "warning" in an arbitrary place of their profile, will accomplish nothing except looking stupid.