Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


19 London, UK Woman


I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18–31
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 10:50pm
Straight, Gay
Middle Eastern, Native American, Hispanic / Latin, White, Other
5′ 1″ (1.55m)
Body type
Judaism, and laughing about it
More than $1,000,000
Doesn’t have kids
Has dogs and likes cats
English, Portuguese (Fluently), Czech (Okay), French (Okay), Spanish (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm a false advertisement, I'm not as cute, funny or smart in real life. I'm also a Strong Independent Black Womyn (who don't).

I'm a young, South-American world-traveler currently living in Finlandsomewhere. I've been around a lot and lived in the UK, Switzerland, (my lovely) Czech Republic and a few other places.

I enjoy messing with people, thus can be quite unpleasant. I'm a major pain in the ass, really. I like funny and witty people, so if you're like that come and talk to me. If you're a Monty Python fan I already consider you my brother.

I'm very interested in martial arts. I enjoy kicking ass and getting my ass kicked. I'm currently involved with BJJ and Karate. Though I currently am out of training due to an injury.

I have way too many pictures and this profile is way too long. I also identify way too much with every It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia character, so I am probably a horrible person.

P.S.: Holidays in Southern Europe!
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Traveling the world, learning different languages, teaching different things, meeting different people.

I hop from country to country, either for tourism or studies (Majorly my destinations' language and culture), and try to make the most out of it until I get a new opportunity somewhere else. I have no idea where I'll end up, and that only makes it better.

I'm involved with volunteer work as much as possible, specially with the disabled. When I'm done with my world travelling thingy, I plan on stopping for a few years to get a degree on Chemistry (I currently study Economics, though, but that's a long story). Hopefully a Masters in Physical Chemistry? I fucking love that shit.

Also, watching BBW dwarf porn. You go girl.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
getting into extremely passionate discussions about ordinary/irrelevant things and convincing people to join me in overly impulsive activities. Also, pottery. No, seriously, I'm really good at pottery. (+10 points if you're willing to reenact that scene of Ghost but with a dick-shaped vase instead while Righteous Brothers plays in the background; +20 points if you want to make that idea into a gay porn starring Tom Cruise and Nicolas Cage, with a Sasha Grey cameo) And looking like I just came out of a bad porno.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Probably my fiery red hair.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Music: I listen to a variety of different artists from a variety of
genres, like Tropkillaz, Ani DiFranco, Fleshgod Apocalypse, Led Zeppelin, Anaal Nathrakh, Elvis Presley, Amon Amarth, Tom Waits, Korpiklaani, Opeth, Frank Sinatra, Orphaned Land, Roni Size, Cacife Clandestino, Kultiration, on, and on, and on...

Movies: Some titles I like are Big Fish, Fargo, The Big Lebowski,
Reservoir Dogs, The Ladykillers, Goodfellas, Fight Club, Shaun of the dead, Jay and Silent Bob Strike back, every Monty Python one (I FUCKING LOVE MONTY PYTHON). I really enjoy horror films, and admit to finding the old, trashy, low-budget ones to be the most entertaining. On the other hand, I'm a huge fan of Kieślowski, specially his Dekalog TV series (As you can see by the username, referring to it's sixth part).

Books: Some of my very favourite titles are 1984, Animal Farm,
Bratya Karamazovy, The Hellbound Heart, Memórias de um Sargento de Milícia, Dom Casmurro, The Unbearable Lightness of Being and The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs.

Games: Pokémon, Conker's Bad Fur Day (love this shit.), Banjo-Kazooie, Shadow of the Colossus, The Legend of Zelda and Mario Fucking Party. When out of stuff to do I may venture myself on some horror-ish ones like Amnesia or Rule of Rose, but that's usually about it. As for board games, I'm a Risk mastermind, so beware.

Food: This is probably a deal breaker for a lot of people so I'll tell you straight away. I use Splenda.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Ferrets (and otters, and polecats and all that stuff that look like weasels)
Muller Rice (don't judge)
Butt showers (or "bidet showers", for you, proper people)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
why on earth do I put so much effort on learning those insane, beautiful, useless languages (I'm looking at you, Czech - And now at you too, Finnish. Seriously, the fuck am I doing?).

If [insert insect name] have a penis.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I'm probably home watching some shitty films wearing polka dot pajamas or playing the 3DS my brother got me recently. It looks just as sexy as it sounds. Or I might just be dancing till 6 a.m. on the streets in Lisbon with random people (and getting back home with multiple bruises on my leg). At this point, you just never really know.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I can't ride a bike.

Also, I'd do Bill Hicks. Yes, currently. Yes, I know he's dead (always up for some necrofunlia).
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you've got big eyes that look like pancakes;

you can make me feel like a tiny little stump;

you're a shy qt who would like to cuddle while watching Monty Python films/really shitty horror flicks and/or old cartoons ;_;

[I am NOT interested in casual sex with men or being the 3rd girl when you and your boyfriend want to "spice things up". I am interested in people I can care about and would care about me, and though I'm willing to meet up, I'd prefer if we chatted a bit more first.]