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93 Portland, OR Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 33–46
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Jul 18
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Mostly vegetarian
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from masters program
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Likes dogs and likes cats
English, French (Okay), Spanish (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
A New Year!!! Hooray!?! Well yes, new opportunities to change the world! Or the same opportunities, offered again. :D

I noticed a while back that the strongest bar in my 'Personality' section is MORE SLOPPY! How did they figure that out??! I tried to skip all those questions! ... OKC is sorta amazing, ... except I don't think I'm very competitive at all, which is the 3rd bar [OK, that vanished, now I'm being called less polite, which i'm not] ... Anyway, yeah, when I live alone, I am pretty sloppy. But when others are sharing my space, I work hard to respect their needs. And if you like organizing stuff, I'm always happy for help with that. OK, moving on. And forgive me, I'm pretty verbose.

I got home in early May from 15 weeks in Nicaragua. (After traveling around the U.S. for most of the Fall.) In Nicaragua, I was studying permaculture and teaching English. Now I have to get used to having good salads and a wide variety of beer again. I've also forgotten how to cross the street by the signal lights, because there are none in most of Nicaragua--please hold my hand if necessary. [OK, that was last year, I went back for a couple weeks' visit this summer, but the culture shock upon return this time has been less.]

I care a lot. About a lot of things. Maybe I could be called opinionated. I've limited myself to four bumper stickers because a wall-papered car dilutes the message.

However, I am also willing to listen--to ALMOST anyone--and I seek out opportunities to do so. I'm continuing to improve my emotional literacy, which comes in handy every day.

If you're skimming, make sure you read the ****'ed section just above the "Six things..."

Compassionate/Nonviolent Communication is an amazing relationship tool/technology that could change your life. (OK, that makes it sound like a cult, or like I'm selling something, but it's not/I'm not.) Seriously, check it out. It's a way to solve the hardest political negotiating problems as well as minor personal stuff--really terrific.

I just took the test at and, if you're interested I got:

I wear my glasses nearly all the time because I like to associate myself with the stereotypes of people in spectacles. Seriously. I lost mine on the beach in Mexico a few years back and went without just fine for a month. But now they're back on. Oh and I think I'll need bifocals soon so that's an issue . . .

When it comes to lots of subjects, I know just enough to be dangerous (or to provide help on pub trivia teams). Not sports though, aside from basic rules, I know almost nothing about team sports.

I try to be the most thoughtful, caring, ethical, spiritual atheist I can be. And no, I don't always succeed. But I keep trying.

The collections of attached photos also show a bit more about me...
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
For six years I taught 6th-8th grade science at a low-income school in Portland. I'm now at a super-exciting transition phase to perhaps a different sort of teaching career. I'm developing a pattern of spending my Summers in places where I can study/practice Spanish. (But not this year--I just got home!)

UPDATE: I taught high school science last year and I'm at a suburban middle school for (just) this year. It's fascinating to experience different schools and demographics of kids (they're all the same; it's their parents who are different). But new jobs are always tons of work.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
...explaining how the world works.

(OK, the objective, physical world. After much study, I'm starting to understand the spiritual and political worlds, but explaining them remains a challenge.)

And listening. Well, I'm pretty good at listening and I'm working on making those skills even better.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I can't even count the number of people who've written "I don't know, you tell me!" in this space. Maybe the question should instead be, "Which of your own personal characteristics do you cherish most?" to which I would reply "my open mind."

I've taken a few tests that appear inappropriate, such as "What kind of girl are you?" and "What kind of man turns you on?" ... But, if your result matches the answer I've engineered for myself, that's a good sign. [Why the hell did they get rid of the fun tests? Is there a petition to restore OKC to what it was before it was bought by Capitalism!! GRRrrrrr....!!]
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Air, Blur, Cornershop, Dido, Ella Fitzgerald, Flaming Lips, Grateful Dead, Howlin' Wolf, Iris DeMent, J5, Kinky, Lyle Lovett, Macy Gray, New Order, Ozomatli, Pretenders, Q???, R. E. M., Steve Earle, They Might Be Giants, U2, Vega-Suzanne, Wilco, XTC, Yes, Zero 7 !!!

I made that list for some other profile YEARS ago from starred songs that were alphabetical in iTunes. So I'll now add the Carolina Chocolate Drops as a single representative of the many great bands in many styles I've enjoyed since.

Great books:
The Life of Pi, Guns Germs & Steel, My Ishmael, James Clavell's stuff, The Am. Heritage Dict., Snow Crash, The Autobiography of Malcolm X, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Great Movies:
Midnight in Paris, Seven Samurai (1954), Amelie, Amores Perros, Bowling for Columbine, Harold and Maude, Children of Men, What the #$*! Do We (K)now!?, Thank You for Smoking, Shawshank Redemption, Why We Fight, and OF COURSE The Princess Bride. ...

Other stuff I like:
Following world events, bird & other animal watching, boats without motors, playing the Asian board game 'Go,' thunder storms--the lack of big lightning in PDX is one of its few drawbacks, but I got a good dose in Nicaragua.

* * * * * * * * * * * *
In this space, I used to have a complex, carefully-worded paragraph ABOUT SEX. Then I realized nearly everyone in the country has read the same poorly-written book. So now I can just say that, EXCLUDING the extreme wealth and emotional damage, I share some important characteristics with Christian Grey. I'm talking bedroom persona only, not that life-contract nonsense from the book (haven't seen the movie). And not during the day--arousal induces an altered mental state. If mutually agreed in advance, I can become very domineering. And i'm good with rope.

Tender, traditional romance can be nice too, but since I'm looking for long-term monogamy, I'm seeking some breadth in my one partner. And for me, power games are the MOST incendiary thing. But I always like cuddling/laughing right afterwards--apparently my "altered state" switches back again fast. Quite fascinating, humans are.

If you're uncertain about how to characterize your own inclinations, I'd suggest the Kink Spectrum Analysis test (the graphs at the end contain huge amounts of revealing data) and/or the different 'What's Your Sexual Style?' test (from which I'm a type O/P and prefer M, N, I or J). You can find links to these two tests under my Tests tab, above. Remember that right after taking a test you can go to your own test list and HIDE the results of the test from others if you're not ready to go public. :-] I also sometimes enjoy discussing these issues, even with people who I'll probably never meet. [They seem to have closed access to the tests. WTF?]
* * * * * * * * * * * *
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Friends & Family
Web access
PRI radio shows, TED streams, etc.
Mixed greens
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game. screwed up the world is. But I'm more into education and action than despair.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Honestly? When I'm not seeing anyone, I'm often at home recovering after the week with teenagers. But I could also be at a small concert or brew pub or out dancing with a few friends (only some weeks require a recovery period). :)
I need to spend more nights sleeping outside again...
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
One of my students asked me a similar question last year as part of an English assignment and I told him I pick my nose. That was about the perfect level of disclosure for 7th grade ... or dating profiles.

OK, actually, the bottom part of my "Favorites" section is way more private. Yep, I've now out-ed myself ... but still, don't tell my parents.

Three years ago, I took the What's Your Real Age test and got 39. I just re-took it and got 42. WTF!??!

Yeah, I've been using OKC for some years. And it's great--I've found some awesome people and had very meaningful relationships (two now friendships) that started here. I do aspire to permanently deleting my profile someday.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.'re really smart and you like to dance.
That's a great combo!!!