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31 Seattle, WA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 24–36
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Today – 6:07pm
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Mostly vegetarian
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Leo, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Has dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Russian (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Hi everyone,
Are you neat and fun and silly? Do you want to ride bikes, run, play, stay up late talking in dive bars, watch movies, hike, travel? I guess, read on. Dull people, you can too.
I'm Simon. I'm not quite as cool as a cucumber but much cooler than most radishes, and I am/might be your huckleberry. I'm a politics/pop culture wonk, singing/dancing fool, & biophile.
I'm interested in people who care about the health of the world and its people and maybe their own health. I love nerdy, pedantic girls. I know that's a bit general, but I get a somewhat uncomfortable talking about myself so I thought it might be better to let some of my friends fill in a few details:

“Floats like a breeze block, stings like a Sweet Valley High breakup.” –robert mugabe
“His theories are quite sensible” - Charlotte Bronte
"I learned everything about eating from him. Or perhaps it was the other way around." -Michael Pollen
"When he sings "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road" at the karaoke bar, I close my eyes and swear I'm in the presence of the real Sir Elton John." - William the Conquerer.
"He'l knit you a sock and make you laugh until it falls right off your foot." - Uncle Sam
“Makes me feel like a natural woman.” - Henry VIII
"An honest, loyal and giant-hearted person, devoted to spreading peace, joy and happiness around the world as casually as one might spread raspberry jam on crumpet." -seabiscuit
"Not only is his carbon footprint less than zero,, his argon footprint is barely visible" -Quetzacoatl
“A pleasant coupling of Wuthering Heights and The Bratz. You should probably just send him a message. ” – Mary Todd Lincoln
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I just adopted a very silly dog--my new obsession--so whatever I'm doing, I'm probably doing with her. That might include: working, volunteering, studying until my eyes fall out of my head, kramdangling, knitting beautiful clothing for my friends and family, serious yoga, light-hearted yoga, running up and down the slopes of Capitol Hill dressed like richard simmons sending out encrypted messages in the breaks of mallard ducks, and dreaming about my future when I'll own an alpaca farm in the mountains of Chile, where I'll ride around on my burro, pulling wool right off the gentle animals and knitting it into applebottom pantalones for the passing gauchos.
I'm also gone back to school to get my RN.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
singing karaoke, making friends, smiling, laughing, flapping without flying, scrabble, banagrams, apples to apples, making pancakes in the shapes of my favorite states, laughing without smiling, changing the subject, walking on the water, awkward conversations, swimming on the land, dancing, singing, getting strangers to tell me their stories, balancing the dry with the silly, lateral reasoning, cooking delicious food, word games, anagrams, pulling facts & statistics out of the air,living-room yoga, punning, decontextualizing, taking notes that I later find difficult to interpret, a is to be as c is to d style comparisons.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
This is tough one. I want to say it's the yam-like shape of my head but that may not be true. Maybe it's my Tyrese Gibson-esque bubble-ass, or the way my jowls flap up and down like the wings of a hummingbird when I talk. I do not know.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: and then we came to the end, a gate at the stairs, the broom of the system, atmospheric disturbances, anything by will self, joan didion, carl zimmer. I read a lot so this is just a few recent titles I've enjoyed. I do read a lot, most of what I read is news and essays about politics and current world events.
Movies: True grit, the devil's backbone, chinatown, 70s political thrillers, warner herzog, errol morris, Coen brothers, the french new wave, anything with jonathan rhys myers.
Shows: the tudors, deadwood, good morning america.
Music: Camera Obscura, wild beasts, neon indian, of montreal, jamie lidell, bibio, and then all kinds of nerdy, digi, dubby stuff.
Food: Pho - veggie please, fruits & vegetables (preferably from the wholesome & beautiful people at the farmer's market)
Tons and tons of podcasts.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
carrots (baby and adult varieties)
My bicycle
needles and yarn
my dog
drunk girls in high heels
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Elton john said that, "Saturday night is alright for fighting," and that may be true but Friday is certainly very good as well.
You also may find me in a bathtub filled with Elizabeth Taylor's classic fragrance white diamonds, smoking Canadian cigars and scrubbing away the shame with a lufa.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Who's that eating that nasty fruit?
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I'd love to hear from anyone, but short girls with glasses may get preferential treatment. Also, if you want to teach me how to play snooker, drink coffee together, show me your favorite restaurant, read me a story, recommend a band, go so a live show, take a hike, climb a tree, pull a shape, bake a cake, or start an a capella group.
And as Columbo might say, "just one more thing," I think it's time I learned how to play Pokémon and magic cards. So I'd you know about those and want to teach me, let me know.