Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


39 Milton Keynes, UK Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–41
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 1:55pm
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Catholicism, and laughing about it
Dropped out of university
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Has a kid
Likes dogs and has cats

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Before we go any further, then if you have used words like "silly", "fluffy" or other kawaii type bullshit as part of your definition of yourself, consider this your final warning.

Clearly I'm just looking to exploit some Bad Santa type poontang right now.

After all, Billy Bob is basically the poster boy for sardonic prople who fuck way out of their league.

I'd really like to have some sexing with interesting and intelligent people. However I'd rather make amusing and cynical remarks than be successful, employed, popular or wealthy.

Thank you Venkman for destroying my life. I should probably have known better than to take a man who takes Thorazine to a date as a role model.


Looking for tasty women.

Not in a parochial Welsh kind of way.

Now on to serious business...

You know what really sorts the men from the boys?

Operation Yewtree.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Paying bills, meeting commitments, restraining myself.

The usual.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Proving that... Oh fuck it.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I make them feel insecure.

They could pick up the occasional book and take control of their lives, but it's probably safer to blame me for them feeling inferior.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Iain M Banks is dead. Why bother reading?

Seriously though, I doubt we share much in common.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Love. Optimism. My Daughter. My Partner. Light. Sunshine.

Is that all 6? I also like puppies and middle-aged women who have no sense of self (I remain astonished as to how many people feel that somehow the above doesn't apply to their particular brand of hysteria).
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Should "feeling sorry for each other" and "consensual sadomasochism" be added to the "Looking For" section of the browse function.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Nowadays? Asleep I guess.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Everything you need to know about life can be summed up in the differences between the original Robocop and the modern - "Re-Imagining".
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You looked at E=MCxC

Thought - "That doesn't make sense!"

Then subsequently looked it up and found it only applied to a body with no momentum.