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34 • Pasadena, CA • Man
I’m looking for
- Ages 25–35
- Near me
- Who are single
- For new friends, short-term dating
- Last online
- Apr 22
- 6′ 1″ (1.85m)
- Body type
- Strictly anything
- Atheism, and very serious about it
- Leo, but it doesn’t matter
- Graduated from space camp
- Sales / Marketing
- Likes dogs
- English (Fluently), Czech (Okay), German (Fluently), Spanish (Okay)
Jack-of-all-trade in the flesh. I am a traveler, musician, magician, story teller... I get excited about things. I'm a typical Leo, even though I don't believe in astrology. I'm also a typical ENTP (if you're familiar with the Meyers-Briggs) but I do think there is validity in Psychology. I'm absent-minded. I like meeting new people. Part of the reason I travel so much.
Don't read the following bit. This was something I made up a long time ago. I leave it on here because it fills up my profile.
But things are far more complicated. Allow me to explain...
I was born, likely, to a troop of Carnies, the lot of them drug addicts and alcoholics. We're not certain which of the whorish women in the group carried me in her womb, or if I was actually a discarded fetus from some teenager who miscarried when the carnival was in her town. The identity of the father is an even tougher speculation. Should the slag whom actually birthed me even remember and be able to recall accurately and say so is thin enough of an imagination's stretch, but to ask her to narrow down in the likely time frame to a reasonable number of "sperm donors" 9 months prior to my birth and then go on to be able to recall their actual identity is the sort of "Ripley's Believe it or Not" story you only read about in fiction. Indeed poor fiction, as it were.
The Carnival group treated me from the beginning as an equal. That is to say the physical and mental abuse, only occasionally interrupted by forced acts of depraved sexual oddity, were not reserved exclusively for the upper ranks of the band, but rather distributed indiscriminately amongst all members equally, myself included. I was given this treatment because there were high hopes for me as something of a useful carnival monkey, should I survive to my adolescent years, and wagers ran high as to which would be my freak talent most of use to these wild animals. unfortunately for them and maybe just a little for myself, I turned out to be something like a jack of all trades. And by "Jack", in this case, I mean "useless human failure." As the years, and their displeasure with me progressed, I found myself in increasingly hostile situations and my life becoming more and more likely to be snuffed out. Weather it was the magician that wanted to saw me in half on stage using a normal box, instead of the special magician one, or my standing in for the chair when the man held off the lions (in rehearsal nonetheless) it was apparent my end was coming soon. Something I welcomed with open arms, I might add. In the end I was fired out of the cannon when they were trying out the new gun powder. That (and the 50 Kilograms of broken glass they loaded into the canon with me) should have killed me. Slowly and painfully, but killed nonetheless. As luck would have it (were it not for bad luck, I would have none at all) I landed in a body of water. The Great Salt Lake, of all places, which really makes me question if or not the placement was an accident when I reconsider the broken glass. But I did as a matter of fact, survive the carnival that was to be my home, family and death were it not for my lack of interesting stage talent, and (fortune always smiling at me, not on) I was taken in by Mormons. The expression out of the fire and into the frying pay comes to mind, but I don't want to imply that Mormons are cannibals. Imply isn't the right word. I mean to insist that they are indeed, very much so, cannibals.
But I digress. After a narrow escape from Utah, which I dare not describe as I may induce traumatic heart failure in either myself or the more empathetic readers of this, I ended up in, of all places, Kansas City, Missouri. Methodists are far more harmless than Mormons, it turns out...
"We are going to die, and that makes us the lucky ones. Most people are never going to die because they are never going to be born. The potential people who could have been here in my place but who will in fact never see the light of day outnumber the sand grains of Arabia. Certainly those unborn ghosts include greater poets than Keats, scientists greater than Newton. We know this because the set of possible people allowed by our DNA so massively exceeds the set of actual people. In the teeth of these stupefying odds it is you and I, in our ordinariness, that are here." – Richard Dawkins
Clue, the Way of the Gun, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Syriana, Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolf, ...
30 Rock, Black Books, the Kids in the Hall, Ab Fab...
The Red Paintings, Dresden Dolls, And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Dead (or AYWKUBTTOD for short) the Pixies, the Flaming Lips, Sonic Youth, Pearl Jam, Nirvana, Harry Connick Jr., this list is eclectic and can go on all day...
Sushi and Thai, and Sushi. I'll try (almost) anything...
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