It doesn't matter what you call him, he's never going to come.
It’s funny ‘cuz it’s sad. Welcome.
In order to understand a good part of the ways in which I think, feel, and function, one must first know this: I am a natural introvert and grew up with few friends and little in the way of familial bonds. I learned self-reliance (and self-discipline) at a young age and developed a lot of interests and pastimes that required no participants but myself. This has granted me a great appreciation for independence and self-sufficiency while making it far more challenging to interact comfortably and confidently with others. I also spend way too much time living in my head. I suspect I will always struggle with both of these things, but I’m kind of okay with that because they’re such an integral part of who I am.
Vulnerability doesn't come easily or naturally for me. (Nor does compromise; blame that on all the “alone time.”) I can discuss topics or ideas of almost any manner with relative ease, but revealing the contents of my heart tends to be nigh impossible beyond the confidence of a select few. That said, I’m finding strict solitude and emotional isolation a bit harder to sit with these days. 2014 has not been particularly gentle thus far, and I’ve found myself re-examining the life I’ve carved for myself and the ways in which it could potentially be improved by allowing others something more than a quick peek behind the curtain. I have no desire to sacrifice my autonomy or my integrity, but I can’t deny that I’m learning to recognize the worth of a reliable support network (even a small one). I'm embarking on a new journey that will hopefully lead me to lower my defenses, make healthy connections, and find ways to define myself and my value as a person that don't revolve so heavily around trying to be The Island.
I consider myself socially and politically progressive, though I live my life by a more conservative moral code. I don’t drink or engage in recreational drug use. There are plenty of folks who think "You only live once!" is an acceptable justification for being reckless and short-sighted, yet I believe the same philosophy is more than sufficient reason for carrying out a cautious, thoughtful existence. I simply don't think our limited time on Earth ought to be wasted on the pursuit of self-destructive indulgences. I place great value on artistic creativity, whether it’s writing, drawing, sculpting, painting, cooking, sewing, music-making, or any other medium of free expression. Even if you can’t do, appreciate; it will get you far. I gravitate toward those who are practical, self-sufficient, and possess (or are actively pursuing) a strong sense of self-awareness.
On top of all of that, I’m basically a geek. I collect all kinds of action figures (see below), and I tend to enjoy now-obscure stuff (music, film) that was kinda-sorta cool about ten or fifteen years prior to my discovering it. The San Diego International Comic-Con is the pinnacle of my year. When it comes to technology, I’m completely inept: I’m not a gamer, I don’t have an iPod, and my touch-screen phone aggravates the hell out of me. I love words (despite how frequently my own fail me), and I love animals; the company I keep must do the same. I like nature, but you won't ever find me setting up camp or partaking in any [potentially] perilous 'adventures.'
Despite the grave self-portrait I may be painting, I possess a broad sense of humour and find amusement in everything from slapstick to dead-baby jokes. Nothing is too dark, too raunchy, or otherwise taboo as long as it's witty and devoid of genuine bigotry. Except hateful jokes about Republicans. I'm pretty sure those punchlines are well-deserved and mostly true.
And fellas, be warned: I don't subscribe to all that ridiculous masc/femme bullshit that the gay community likes to fling at itself. I embrace the feminine aspects of my being as readily as the masculine ones, and I value the same ability in others. Conduct and integrity define a person more than any wishfully/fearfully self-applied label ever will, and if you think any guy whose mannerisms or interests do not proclaim I AM THE MANLIEST OF MEN! in a deep and thunderous voice is beneath you, pass me by. Archaic, one-dimensional views on sex and gender are not welcome here.
To sum it all up, I am almost a textbook Aquarius, a true Chinese Water Dog, and a relentless INTJ (Myers-Briggs). http://youtu.be/Vcqg2i_CSaU