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ElusiveDevil

23 M Austin, TX

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 3:11pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
When drinking
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Virgo, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Sales / Marketing
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), French (Poorly)

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My self-summary
I'm a dislocated Northerner who's still trying completely failed at trying to adapt to Austin. I miss public transportation, the faster pace of the city, and I get kind of weirded out when people call me "Sir". The northeastern/"big city" mentality of constantly being anxious, ambitious and moving ten million miles a minute doesn't seem to fit with Austin's laid-back attitude.

I work in marketing and I really enjoy hockey, live music (I don't like festivals though. Go figure), video games, beer, traveling, my career, and Adventure Time.

Imagination isn't something you should lose as you get older. Likewise, your head shouldn't be so far in the clouds that you can't do the work to make your dreams a reality. I like to think big and dream big, with a hefty dash of realism, snark and cynicism.
What I’m doing with my life
I work in internet marketing, which is 60% copywriting, 20% telling old people how the internet works, 10% derping around with some website code, and 10% playing pool and eating ice cream in the breakroom because I work for a startup. The ice cream is great, but I'd like to do something a little more intense and rewarding.

I'm a rabid hockey fan, and I play (pretty terribly) as well. I try to visit a handful of new places a year - my last trip was Chicago, which I absolutely loved. In my free time I enjoy yelling at my TV, drinking in dive bars, dancing at Barbarella, stuffing my face with any pizza I can find that is acceptable.

I'm actually a pretty old man, I only get 6th-St drunk once a month at most and I enjoy drinking and yelling at my TV at home on a Friday night. At least during hockey season.
I’m really good at
- "Business" / my job. Probably something important to be good at.

- Singing "Born to Run" at karaoke places

- I make an awesome baked ziti

- Forgetting that one item when I go to H-E-B.

- Mario Kart.
The first things people usually notice about me
- Scruff
- Plaid or a 'weird' t-shirt.
- Generally salty disposition (I promise you, I'm not actually mean. Austin is just full of sunshiney people. I am not one of them. It's completely normal to be salty and bitch about everything in the northeast.)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books - Right now I'm reading some about how to do fun data tricks in Excel and with SQL. Isn't that just so fun?

Music - Rather then list what sounds cool and things I might not actually listen to all that often; here's what Spotify has to say about the artists I like, which should give you a decent idea of what I listen to.

Idina Menzel (yeah, no...Let It Go is the best.)
The Fratellis (I was on a Chelsea Dagger kick in Chitown)
The Colourist
Los Campesinos!
The Gaslight Anthem
M83
CHVRCHES
Dan Deacon
The Naked and Famous
Passion Pit
The xx
Bruce Springsteen
Tycho
Explosions in the Sky

Radio - I enjoy NPR. Every other station here makes me want to punt a puppy (although I have a soft spot for Delilah on Magic 95.5. CALL YOUR MOTHER. TELL HER YOU LOVE HER AND SHIT)

Movies - Aside from boring finance/environmental/economic documentaries and FROZEN; anything by Tarantino, No Country for Old Men, 3:10 to Yuma, every Disney movie....there's a bunch of others I can't remember, I'm not a film buff.

TV - My primary pasttime is watching my hometown hockey team on the couch at home and verbally berating them from 2,500 miles away. I watch plenty of hockey, basketball, football - professional sports in general (zero interest in anything college related. Once again, I have not picked the right town.)

Actual TV shows - The Simpsons, Adventure Time, 30 Rock, Mad Men, History Channel's crazy bullshit, Daria; basically anything funny or otherwise amusing.

Food - I'm a huge fan of pizza and ramen (good ramen - not just the stuff in a packet.), but brisket has grown on me. My last meal would be a pizza, buffalo wings and a Coors Light followed by a British digestive cookie and some milk.

I really really like Starbucks and the concentration of Starbucks here is nowhere near Manhattan which is disappointing for me.
The six things I could never do without
1. My job / career / etc. - I'm super career driven.
2. Friends and Family - because everyone needs company
3. Hockey - by far, my favorite hobby
4. Dive bars - fuck dirty 6th, I want to drink PBR in a dark hole of a bar.
5. Public transit and walkable neighborhoods - Drunk driving is bad. I wish the rest of Austin realized that sometimes. Plus I just enjoy walking instead of driving.
6. Coffee - I'm not functioning without it.

BONUS: Six things I could easily do without

1. A car - didn't have a car in New Jersey and it was AMAZING. So much cheaper, you get great exercise from walking, and you actually meet people people in your community. I don't get the appeal of owning a shiny, expensive metal box and sitting in traffic.

2. College sports - My college doesn't really do much in sports. I get why you UT kids are into it, I can respect that. But if college sports ceased to exist tomorrow, I wouldn't particularly care. I also really don't like the NCAA's way of doing business - players should be paid for their services.

3. Franklin BBQ - I refuse to patronize a restaurant that thinks it's acceptable to make people wait four hours for their product. No interest in trying it or giving them any amount of money.

4. The Tea Party - I get the need for fiscal conservatism, even though I'm a moderate democrat. But my god, Ted Cruz is insane.

5. Baseball - I have no strong feelings about baseball, I'll even what it casually. But I could do without it.

6. Pissy hipsters - from Brooklyn to Austin, nothing is worse then the people who constantly bitch about how "this city's changed, maaaaan". The world is fucking changing all the time, you asshat. Get used to it.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Why is my hockey team so disappointing?

Where am I going to travel to next?

Who the fuck though putting brisket in ramen was a good idea? Or clams on pizza? Why must the hipsters of Austin ruin the foods I love?

What will I be doing next year? What job do I want next? At what point to I move out of Austin?

Why the fuck did I forget to buy cream cheese at HEB?
On a typical Friday night I am
A) Downtown at Barbarella because Barbarella is the best bar ever.

B) Kickin' it with beers and friends/coworkers at Sherlock's or Shangri La

C) Yelling at the television, either playing a video game or watching sports.

All of these have an equal chance of occurring
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Lumpy Space Princess is by far my favorite TV character and I do a pretty accurate impression of her.

If you couldn't tell - I'm not super thrilled with Austin and I feel like I don't fit in here. Planning on moving to Chicago, Dallas, or another city by the end of the year.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 20–30
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating
You should message me if
You'd like to shoot the breeze over a few drinks and actually talk in real life, because a number on a screen doesn't tell you shit about interacting with a person. I dated a girl for a year, got along perfectly, and we're a 43% match. I've went on dates with people who are a "95% match" and I couldn't stand them.