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27 Reading, UK Woman


I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18–99
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
May 3, 2014
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body type
Strictly other
When drinking
Other, and somewhat serious about it
Cancer, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Strictly non-monogamous
Has a kid, but doesn’t want more
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm a friendly, perceptive and demanding person. I'm told I come across a little harsh sometimes but I always make a genuine effort to know people and I'm really not that scary. I like working things out about people, watching comedy and dancing, actually dancing myself, debating and having good sex. I'm also married to nifara, which isn't about to change!

Nifara and I are in an open marriage and we're on here looking for relationships of all kinds. Dating, friends, possible sex (but only if we already know you a bit) and all the blurred stuff inbetween. We are super disinterested in people who want to have affairs with either of us without the other one knowing but open to individually dating people.

I would not consider myself 'female' most of the time and I hate being labelled in very female terms. If you really like the normal social concepts of male and female in the UK right now then we may not get on because you could find yourself constantly alienating me without realising it. I dress 'female' and kind of view my body like an old-fashioned arranged marriage - I didn't choose it but I've built a relationship with it now and its mine.

We have a kid, who is six months old and super cute (we get stopped in the street which is kind of nice). He takes up a lot of time to be honest, and going out is harder but even more important! He sleeps like a goddamn angel and we are eternally grateful for it.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Working in Higher Education in an administrative capacity which I adore. Hoping someday to manage a team of people and get to make lots of interesting strategic decisions. Reading, looking at Reddit too much, watching TV series, seeing friends, trying to find balance in my head (long time sufferer of depression).
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Organising things, making fast and efficient decisions, talking to strangers, worrying, learning, imagining lots of different possibilities, writing very dry administrative documents. I used to be pretty good at expressing myself but now I need to get out of the house more.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My eyes, my smirk, apparently my smell (in a pleasant way I'm assured). Right now I have really stupid hair as I'm trying to grow it out.

Possibly by boobs, though I tend to dress down. I picked 'curvy' on here, which is apparently code for overweight. I'm just really hourglass but dress appallingly like 80% of the time.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Inception is my favourite film, with Fightclub and The Shawshank Redemption joint second. I also enjoy V for Vendetta, Scott Pilgrim, and most anything by Christopher Nolan.

My comfort book is Spares by Michael Marshall-Smith, I love Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov and both the Birds and Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier (Hitchcock was an awful awful Director as far as I'm concerned). Reading the Illuminatus Trilogy has been one of the best experiences of my life and I would highly recommend it (for what that's worth). I also enjoy sci-fi, though there's certainly a lot I haven't read yet, I especially like Dune, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and most everything by Iain M. Banks. His books make me feel at home.

For graphic novels, Alan Moore is the absolute master of the genre and I especially love Watchmen.

For TV series I love House of Cards, Black Books, Game of Thrones, Futurama, Catterick, Angel and Rome. I also enjoy anything Addams Family related, including the rubbish TV series, and have a soft spot for any number of the terrible cheesy programmes James Nesbitt has been in (Jekyl, Murphy's Law).

I also love games - Baldur's Gate, classic Doom, Fable II, Farcry 3, Rayman Origins, Uncharted, Assassins' Creed, COD, the Lego games, Halo, Little Big Planet, Katamari Forever. I wanted to like Killzone Shadowfall.

Music I like: The Smiths, Billie Holiday, Bo Burnham but I'm mainly one of those annoying people who likes two songs by your favourite artist but knows of nothing else they've ever done. Broadly speaking I like folk, classic rock and soul mostly. I like rap but its too distracting and I hate trilly singing (looking at you Leona Lewis) so a lot of current pop is right out. If we're in a shop and someone asks what the song is I can pretty much guarantee I won't know the answer.

I like fruit and veg very much, meat cooked until its almost inedible and delicious non-gluten puddings.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.

My partner

Research and the scientific method


The feeling, when you debate something fiercely, that you only actually know what you've said when you hear it out loud

The recognition of which bits of my life are the social contract, and the freedom that knowledge gives me
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
People, being able to stop time, news, group dynamics, human rights, higher education, conversations, funny internet sites.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Chatting to friends on the phone, reading books (fiction and non-fiction), becoming unnecessarily involved on discussion threads, and going out for a drink and a dance.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
When I first watched the Big Lebowski at 17 I didn't like it because I thought that 'people like the Dude' were lazy wasteful layabouts. When worried, my thoughts fitted in a lot of neat little boxes which didn't match up to the rest of the world at all. I am much better at not doing this but, as for a lot of people, it is a constant battle.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You live locally and want to meet up evenings/weekends.

We have a fairly high match rating for ethics.

You aren't freaked out by conversations about mental health or by coming across it in life. We have too much involvement with it - ourselves/friends/family - for this not to be a dealbreaker. Curious is fine, wanting to run away is not.