I didn't join this site to get any romantic partner - do not message me for that purpose, I'm not interested! I am asexual, probably because I'm autistic (I claimed I was seeing someoe solely to discourage interest).
More specifically, I'm officially diagnosed with PDD-NOS (atypical autism). I almost meet the criteria for Asperger Syndrome, but not quite. I am obsessively interested in psychiatry and disability rights. If there was a cure for being autistic, not only would I not take it, I would be horrified and sad and campaign against it - autism isn't something a person has, it's a part of who they are.
I'm an idealist in that I am highly committed to my ideals and want to change the world. I do not idealize the way the world is. I'd call myself an idealistic cynic, I guess, since I'm idealistic about how the world could be but cynical about how it is. It's a mix I think is tpical of activists - you must perceive something is wrong and have hope for changing it to be an activist (unless you're a pseudo-activist, who does activist stuff to get approval or feel good about yourself).
I was sexually abused as a child, which, in addition to being autistic, is part of why I'm completely *not interested* in a sexual relationship. I've had one, it was absolutely awful! Although I intellectually understand that most people enjoy sex, I can't remotely imagine why anyone would find it anything but disgusting. (Note: If you like sex, don't take this as a criticism. This is just how I feel, something I cannot control, and I don't think this is a correct view of sexuality.) I also hate our society's obsession with sex. If you find yourself turned on by my saying I was sexually abused, get yourself counseling, because there's something wrong with you.
Je parle francais un peaux. J'ai alle a une ecole francais pour K-4, mai mes professeurs etaint tres mechant, ce qui m'a fait effraye de francais, ainsi je n'a pas parle francais dans une longe temps.
I am autistic, idealistic, and traumatized
What I’m doing with my life
I'm advocating for the rights of autistic and other disabled people on the Internet (see abnormaldiversity.blogspot.com - my blog). I'm volunteering with an activity program with developmentally disabled people, both with kids and adults (so don't say I don't know what 'the real disabled people' are like). I'm trying to get through the hoops necessary for an unschooled (a type of homeschooling where the child completely directs their own learning) kid to enter university and train to be a psychologist. I'm trying to get my fiction book about addictive weather magic and my non-fiction book about emotional abuse in schools published. I'm trying to figure out the causes of some mild medical problems I have - mild faintness on standing, with low heart rate when I'm lying down and normal/high normal when I'm standing and low-normal blood pressure, and mild chronic joint pain associated with no swelling or apparent abnormality which goes away sometimes if I twist around the joint, present in my neck, ankles, knees, hips, toes and fingers.
I’m really good at
Reading - I read fast and with good comprehension, although if the subject doesn't interest me I can't pay attention. I love to read and unless I'm very tired, *must* have a book in order to fall asleep.
Talking - I use big words accurately and explain things well, and I really like to talk about my interests (but it's hard for me to give others equal time or handle conversations with more than one other person)
Abstract thinking, connecting ideas - I am (being honest, not conceited) far better than average at this.
Writing - As well as my strengths in talking, I also have good intuitive sense of grammar and spelling due to reading so much combined with being a fairly visual learner. I have some difficulty organizing my ideas and my handwriting is slow and laborious, but other than that I'm an excellent writer. When I was 15, my mother told me my writing (and reasoning) were far better than most of the college students (mostly first years, but not all) that she's taught - and she wasn't just being a proud Mom.
Relating to developmentally disabled people and animals (not trying to insult anyone by putting them together, just that those areas are related, due to a) ability to relate to someone who can't talk, and b) ability to relate to someone whose mind is vastly different from yours). This is a common talent in autistic people, possibly because we spend all our lives interacting with people who are very different from us (normal people). In addition, a large proportion of developmentally disabled people are either autistic or have autistic traits, which means they're naturally easier for autistics to understand. In order to relate to someone who can't talk and/or is very different from you, you have to make a specific effort to 'learn their language', which is something most people don't get much practice in because practically everyone is relatively similar to them.
The first things people usually notice about me
Some people seem to first notice that I'm pretty (I really hate being pretty, but unfortunately I am). I tend to be either oblivious to this or frightened by it.
If someone talks to me, usually they think I'm very smart and maybe a bit eccentric.
Unless I'm seeking help from them because I'm confused or overloaded or lost, in which case they tend to think I'm developmentally disabled (bus drivers especially see this, because the transit system is so confusing to me).
If they're a teacher, the first thing they might notice is that I make a lot of comments or questions, many of them quite intelligent and 'nit-picky' (if I like the subject) or that I'm inattentive or defiant (if I don't like the subject or they alienate me somehow).
Autistic kids often seem to pick up on the fact that I'm autistic fairly quickly. In the volunteering program I'm in, one child seemed quite startled by the idea that 'someone like him' could be on the other side of the helper/helped power divide disabled people usually see so much of.
At the Cree class and the Mandarin class I took, my guess is most people noticed first that I'm very white.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
My favorite books are generally non-stereotpical fantasy. Here are some examples:
Madeline L'Engel's books, such as A Wrinkle in Time, A Swiftly Tilting Planet, Many Waters, An Acceptable Time, etc.
Tamora Pierce's books set in Tortall(Alanna: The First Adventure is the earliest one, apart from the one about Bekka Cooper) and her Winding Circle books.
Interview with a Vampire and The Vampire Lestat by Anne Rice.
Animorphs by KA Applegate (an old favorite, now mostly nostalgic liking for me)
Garth Nix's Sabriel series and his Keys to the Kingdom series.
I don't watch movies much, but I have a few favorites:
Some Japanese anime movies, the ones where the plot is very non-western. Examples include Spirited Away (a real favorite, a wonderful movie) and Haibane Renmei.
The Wall, which I haven't actually seen, but what I've seen of it on YouTube has me desperately wanting to see it.
Oh Brother Where Art Thou?, a movie set in the southern states about three escaped convicts which has a lot of symbolism of Odysius.
In terms of music, I like two types - songs about series issues, usually political, and wildly fantastical songs. Examples of the first include Midnight Oil (my favorite is Hot Rocks) and a lot of the music from The Wall, and examples of the second include Genesis: Nursery Cryme (my favorites are Old King Cole, the one about Harold the Barrel who cut off his toes and served them for tea, and the one about the Royal Hogweed) and a lot of Rush songs. In general most of the songs I like are fairly old ones, mostly because the only recent songs I've heard have generally been disgusting love songs on the radio or ones that just fade into the background for me (this category includes instrumentals with no singing and songs in other languages apart from English or sometimes French). An exception to the rule that lyrics are all that matters for me is dance music, since the rhythmic pounding makes my head hurt so even with great lyrics I probably won't like it. Love songs often get me plugging my ears with rhythmic jerking of my fingers to completely disrupt any ability to comprehend the words, if I can't turn them off.
The six things I could never do without
air, food, water, sufficient atmospheric pressure to keep me from exploding but not enough to make me implode, etc. Anything not essential for life I can survive without, although without certain things I'd probably go nuts.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
disability rights, specific syndromes that interest me, fantasy stories I want to write.
On a typical Friday night I am
At home, or at my Dad's office playing computer games, depending on how late you're talking about.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I was sexually abused.
You should message me if
You want to engage in intellectual discussions about something that interests me, you or someone you care about has a developmental or psychological difference you'd like advice about, you want to comment about one of my tests, or something like that. Don't contact me to say you'd like to do something sexual or romantic with me, or to sell me something. (By the way, if any of the spammers who are constantly e-mailing me read this, please note that since I don't have a penis, I have absolutely no desire to buy Viagra. Not that I would if I did have one.)