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Excalibur212

38 M New York, NY

My Details

Last Online
Today – 7:18am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Agnosticism, and very serious about it
Sign
Aquarius, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Sales / Marketing
Income
$100,000–$150,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Pets
Likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Honest, emotionally intelligent, and mature guy (who will always still be a sarcastic goofball and big kid at heart) looking for the real thing.

Not interested in games or hookups. Never married, no kids, relatively drama free*.

*Most of my "drama" comes from being a neurotic adopted New Yorker (think Mad About You). So if you can deal with this, put me in my place when needed, banter with me lovingly over stupid meaningless shit that just brings us closer, tell me to shut the fuck up and just chill sometimes, and we can have sex on the kitchen countertop on certain occasions, things will be just fine. ;-)

Please find geeky sexy and don't be religious in any way, shape or form.

Be extroverted but know your homonyms.

I will always be somewhat of a lost soul, but i'm doing just fine.

Introvert disguised as extrovert when i feel like it. MBTI's have become so cliche on this site, so go ahead and guess if you want to...

I hate my age. It sounds so "old" to me, and definitely much older than i feel most days. Not because i care about the number, but because i think for some people who haven't met me in real life yet, it inclines them to make assumptions about my life up until this point that are untrue. Please ask, and never assume.

I hate text messages and emails. Let's meet for real conversation. It's what all humans should do.

"I don't care you who are, where you're from, what you've done..." etc. Who you are today, what guides you as a person, and what you want to be going forward is all that matters. I can be very judgmental and critical of people sometimes which are perhaps my greatest faults, but i will never judge you for having tried to live life to its fullest, for asking hard questions or making tough decisions, or for having tested and pushed yourself in ways many people are afraid to or will never do (even to fucked up consequences on occasion). I have just told you my 2 greatest faults, so if you can look past these and see the positive in someone who really tries to be a better person each day, i promise to do everything i can to be the best possible person/friend/boyfriend/more that i can be to you. That is the most honest answer i can give. I will give you flowers unexpectedly and make you French Toast in bed.

Sarcasm a must.

No smokers need apply.

Inquire within.
What I’m doing with my life
Figuring it out, one day at a time, while bankrupting the MTA via 17 swipes per day of my unlimited metrocard...
I’m really good at
Details. Listening. Observing. Analyzing. Organizing. Pontificating. Rambling. Being a jackass (sometimes). Creating. Procrastinating. Giving. Baking.
The first things people usually notice about me
My sexy hair? My proper use of grammar? My New Balance m587's (the most comfortable sneakers ever made, with Rollbar and Absorb technology)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books:
- Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson
- If You Don't Have Big Breasts, Put Ribbons On Your Pigtails
- Catcher in the Rye
- Marina and Lee
- Jump
- The Book of Bunny Suicides
- Neither Here Nor There

Movies:
- Lost in Translation
- A Beautiful Mind
- The Royal Tenenbaums
- One Night At McCool's
- Garden State
- Naked (Mike Leigh film, unrelated to Sedaris book)
- Leaving Las Vegas
- The Naked Gun, Airplane!, Hot Shots!, and generally movies with exclamation points in the titles...
- The Ice Storm

TV:
- Cosby, Colbert, Stewart, Seinfeld and Stewie

Music:
- Explosions in the Sky, m83, Danger, Kavinsky, house/club, Beastie Boys, old school rap, anything good

Food:
- Anything with peanut sauce
The six things I could never do without
1) friends
2) challenge
3) pizza
4) hugs
5) solitude
6) blackout curtains
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How my choice of toothbrush has less to do with tartar/plaque fighting prowess and bristle type, and more to do with whether the large psuedo-ergonomically designed handle will fit through one of the similarly-yet-subtly-slightly-different-sized 4 round roles of ceramic toothbrush holder permanently affixed to the wall above my bathroom sink, and whether or not this means i should be institutionalized now or sometime in the near future...

Where I want to be in 3-5 years... (It's so hard to pick just one planet...)

Why so many women's online dating profiles say they "love to laugh" (who does not love to laugh?) and that they're "fiercely loyal" (run over any ex-bestfriends with your SUV, have you?)

All the things i would be tempted to buy at 2 a.m. if i lived in suburbia (that garden hose that contracts to like a 10th of its size is pretty cool)

Time travel

Finding new things to do (clearly i've lived in NYC way too long)

That not grooming yourself, wearing plaid, and wearing glasses that don't fit your facial structure don't make you unique or special (DOH! sorry, hipsters! ;-p)

Why drinking alcohol in the past 5 years or so makes me sneeze.... (WTF!??)

My next trip... :-)
On a typical Friday night I am
ah ya know, just hittin' the crack pipe....
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
how ridiculous religion is and how on earth otherwise seemingly normal and educated people can actually believe such nonsense
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 28–34
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating
You should message me if
You are intelligent, independent, opinionated and passionate. You enjoy challenge and like to push yourself. You have profile pics from this year and it's what you actually look like. You're not religious. You have a firm grasp of homonyms. You will go to the novelty shop and play with all the silly things with me. You agree Legos are the most awesome thing invented, ever. You have a solution for cleaning that small strip of the kitchen floor between the side of the counter and the fridge. You've read this far.