wow, so this whole thing is in severe need of updating, which I'm doing bit by bit, and slowly.
Also, just moved to Dallas, as in today (several months ago now), so more updating to be done.

In case you don't know, I spend most of my time in perpetual insanity, as if my brain was a small corn kernal slowly expanding under the incessant heat of the microwave of life, and then one day it will explode into a tasty morsel to serve as a snack to some massive celestial being. If that scares you, I'm just kidding and I like long walks on the beach.

I had something of a summary here, but I thought this might work a bit better:

25 random things about me:
1. I am deeply, deeply in love with music, for more reasons than can be listed
2. I like taking walks in pouring rain (or just in general), and jumping in puddles
3. I hate making decisions, but not because I actually hate making decisions, but because people like to rush me, and I don't like being rushed, because when I finally do make up my mind, there's really no point in trying to change it. You can ask just about anyone.
4. I plan on hiking the entire Appalachian Trail at some point in my life, hopefully sometime in the near future, a week long test trip is currently in the works.
5. I frequently talk to trees, and plants in general... but usually trees, in my head. very frequently.
6. I am a pyro. Fire fascinates me, and I love to see how things burn, and if left alone (or not) with an open flame, will likely explore this on whatever happens to be lying around.
7. I lost 145 pounds (make that 160) using diet and exercise. As a result of such a drastic change I still occasionally dissociate from my body and have no idea what I look like and can't recognize myself in the mirror or pictures, before and after.
8. I would be a great fiction writer, but I'm too much of a perfectionist. I do, however, plan on overcoming that particular obstacle.
9. I have the ability to read and understand people and a tendency to grasp a person's psychology, sometimes better than they themselves do. This means I usually know exactly what you're feeling. It sounds weird and pompous, but it's true.
10. I have two younger brothers, and we all somehow manage to exist as polar opposites even though there are three of us.
11. I've been struck by lightning and still maintain a love of raging electrical storms.
12. My inanimate objects all have personalities in my head, and I name them, but I usually forget what I name them, and often rename them many times, but they always have the same personality... except for the schizophrenic ones.
13. I've never lost the game Scattergories, and therefore I hate it. This is partially due to my vocabulary, and partially due to the fact that I'm stubborn as hell.
14. I'm surprisingly flexible, though not really shockingly so. Well, occasionally shockingly so.
15. I sometimes still get carded for R rated movies.
16. I speak mostly in sarcasm.
17. One of the ways my parents used to punish me was by taking away my library card. Another way was sitting straight up on a wooden chair looking at a white wall for several hours at a time. This my explain why I tend to dislike too much white, and also why I got in more trouble for stealing books from the library, even though I returned them... This probably explains alot of other things too, but I won't go into that now.
18. I have a surprisingly morbid sense of humor.
19. I over analyze everything, or at least that's what everyone tells me. I'm aware of it, but to me it usually just seems normal to think of everything. This is also why I'm rarely, if ever surprised, and pretty much always fake it, if I think I'm supposed to be.
20. I'm an INFJ. look it up.
21. I carry bubbles with me wherever I go. (I actually just gave away my last bottle, so I need to go get more)
22. I'm not sure that I've ever honestly believed that I was born to be an American, not that I'm ashamed of it, or never have bouts of nationalistic pride; I just don't think it's quite the right fit for me. Though I'm willing to try and find out if there is a place in this country that is.
23. I confuse people, and take a secret pleasure in it, though I don't necessarily do it intentionally.
24. I want to get my PhD in philosophy, but can't actually justify spending that much time and money on school for something I wouldn't actually be able to use to get a job I would love, so I stick to never ending discussions and perpetual thought.
25. If school were free I would go forever.... and might still anyway, just more sporadically.

Currently existing in the wonderful world of retail management.

this is the part that needs the most editing, seeing as I've moved.

Right now I work in a brokerage firm, and while it's a great job, it's definitely not what I want to do for the rest of my life. I went to college for a year after high school, but at the time I didn't know what I wanted (triple major Technical Theatre, English, and Psych with a German minor at one point), and it wasn't right for me. I got a job at a bank, and I moved out of my parents house completely (best move of my life). After three apartments, seven roommates, and alot of thinking, I now live very happily on my own and know exactly what I want out of my life. I am returning to school as soon as I am able to get my associate degree in business, and then I'm going on to design school (maybe in that order). After which I'm going to get a job at a design firm,and at that time Ill continue with my education and get my B.A. in business. My ultimate dream is to own my own design firm that would handle both interior corporate and home design, with an architectural side as well, and maybe even event design and planning. More than anything it'll just take time and patience. O! And I want to go to culinary school by the time I'm fifty five, for no particular reason, other than I like to cook, just cause I can. Its an ambitious plan, but its not a dream I'm going to give up without a fight. It might not go exactly as planned, and I think Im flexible enough to be okay with that, but Im nothing if not determined when I put my mind to it. Another goal I have is to be a nomad for a while, I don't want to live in any one city for longer than a year and a half, I want to live lots of new places, experience lots of new things, which is actually kind of odd, because I'm supposed to be resistant to change, but for some reason I cant get enough of it either. Hmm, anyway, there is a list of places I want to live, it's long, and it's awesome, and I've already started, and I just recently found a friend that wants to go with me, which just makes it that much better. Basically I do want to settle down somewhere, but I want to be sure it's the right place before I do it, and the only way to find out is to go everywhere. It's not any easy life, but it would be exactly that, a life. My life.

Listening, random knowledge, picking up on things, going with the flow, most things where my fingers or lips are involved, dirty or not, reading people, keeping people confused (don't worry, they usually catch back up), being me.

Being good at things isn't really a problem for me, it's deciding which things I want to be REALLY good at. I love so many different things, it makes for a tough choice.

on a practical level, reading, from practice if nothing else. O, and I've played the cello for um, over a decade now, so I'm decent at that too.

As written by my best friend Rebecca:

Josh decided it would make more sense for somebody else to write this section for him, which I tend to agree with. Somehow, though, he decided it should fall upon me. Now on the one hand, I can see that; I'm his best friend. However, Josh and I have been friends for nine years. I don't remember what I first noticed about him. We were eighth graders! If the first thing you notice about a 13 year old boy also happens to be the first thing you notice about the same 22 year old adult male, either you're a pervert (of the bad variety) or Josh has some hideously obvious deformity – neither of which bode well for your and his future relationship. Upon further reflection, I realized that I knew exactly what I would write about: his eyes. It's not so much the color (I consider blue to be over-rated as an eye color), but the shape. Josh has the most amazing crinkly eyes. They're kind of puppy dog eyes, until he smiles; then they scrunch up to the point that they completely disappear and it reminds me of a teddy bear. Maybe the teddy bear appeal is why so many people feel the need to share their life's problems with Josh. Regardless, I'm going with eyes as the first thing people notice about Josh.

My interests can be, um, less than typical (things that are unique, not just weird)
Naming favorites is incredibly difficult for me, as I really don't have any.... or maybe too many.
My love for books is insatiable, though the ones that I own tend to be the ones I loved when I was younger, and still do, that I can dive into to escape every now and then, and they tend to be primarily of the fantasy genre. Those will probably always be my favorites. Some author examples:
Garth Nix, Diane Duane, Tamora Pierce, C.S. Lewis, Roald Dahl (who will forever be my favorite author), Isobelle Carmody, Robert Jordan, Patricia Wrede
Beyond those, my book taste is pretty much a free for all. Same goes for plays.

Musically.... god, where do I start? I have a massive library, somewhere around 60GB, and most people have never heard of about 95% of it (there's really no way to say that without sounding pretentious... I won't lie, I can be, but really I just have odd taste). I like alot of different things, but my favorites tend to have a darker tone to them. I have my fair share of dance, and techno remixes (I am gay), but I do enjoy the rest of the world of electronica as well, and electroclash, beyond most stereotypical taste. I don't go much for R&B and far less even for Country. My pop samplings are relatively limited, but present. I have a soft spot for musicals, due to my theatre background, and some classical due to my orchestral background. Rock and I tend to get along, especially most forms of electronic rock. Really this is far better related through examples, which I'm sure I would be happy to give you if it were requested.

Food? um.... yes. I'll eat most things, and I love trying new things. I'm a big fan of sushi, and what people might consider health food, but I delve into my share of junk every now and then... usually all at once. O, and I could eat hummus and pita chips forever. I mean forever.

Music. I experience it with my entire being, and I would die without it.

Nature. Nothing is quite so restorative for me as the natural world, especially trees.

Books. If music is my heart, then books are my lungs.

My Brain. (not necessarily my mind, that has a tendency to disappear entirely at times)

Thought. Where my mind usually disappears to, quite often beyond my control. Ever thought so hard that you just have to curl up in a ball and ride it through? yeah. intense.

Bubbles. Just trust me. (given my rather sedate nature, most find it to be a fun surprise, and they come in handy more often then not.)

EVERYTHING!!! philosophical, random, pointless, detail, images, stories, I love to think about it all. I spend ALOT of time in my head. Ironically, considering how well acquainted my head is with the clouds, I'm very down-to-earth. I also spend alot of time thinking about the fact that I'm a walking contradiction.

since the move? watching movies with my best friend, now roommate.

hmm, well, I'm pretty much an open book, but one that's in control of the pages you read. The longer you spend with a book, the more pages you can turn and read. The book doesnt lie, or hide the facts, but the story takes time and depth. Thats pretty much how it works.

Other thing is, I'm different, not in a bad way, though it's hard to put your finger on exactly what it is at first, and I know alot of people say that, but in my case, its not always obvious, but it's true. It's hard to explain, one of my friends once told me that when she thinks of me I remind her of about 10 other completely different people she knows, but all at once, and when she tried to count the number of people she's ever met like me, she can only ever get up to one finger. The only reason that it's somewhat private information is because I can be difficult for people to wrap their head around, many have tried, most have failed, and I get hurt, so I usually keep it to myself and let people try and figure me out at their own pace.
... so I was told to summarize all that up with just a word: enigmatic, which I suppose is true.

what's if?

I would also like to point out while my status is not actually set as single, I am for the time being. I have it set otherwise to cut down on traffic as it got a bit much to deal with.