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40 M Madison, WI

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 9:55pm
6′ 3″ (1.91m)
Body Type
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Working on Ph.D program
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Has dogs and has cats
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
I find that when I write about myself I come off as much more serious and staid than I do in person. I'm actually kind of a goof but I'm a rather formal writer. So read this whole section imagining that I'm wearing a flamingo-shaped balloon hat; that'll probably help set the appropriate mood.

I'm a relationship-driven knowledge seeker. My spirit animal is a bear, according to this quiz: I'm happy enough with that answer. I have a full head of hair.

This spirit animal quiz says I'm an otter: which I guess is ok, too, if I get to play in the river and eat raw fish with my hands.

I'm guided by values and relationships. I think a lot about how my actions impact those around me, and how my decisions fit in a moral framework. I think the act of being mindful about these things is as important as the decisions themselves. Also, flamingo hat.

I'm a graduate student, working on my PhD; it's a long, slow process, and one I believe I'm coming towards the end of, with considerable relief. I don't regret it, but I'm ready to be done and move on.

I'm musician; I play songs I wrote with a little band in town. My band members are an incredible inspiration to me; I tend not to believe that I deserve their attentions, but they keep showing up. My music is constantly evolving, and the past year has been just incredible for my creative life. Some of my songs are dark; some are joyful. If we spend much time together one of them will probably end up being about you.

I play Ultimate Frisbee; I'm pretty decent I think given my age and the relatively late start I got on it. It brings me a lot of happiness; there's a great community and it keeps me fit. I also rock climb, some, though I tend to drop that over the summer frisbee season. I mostly do bouldering; I really enjoy the mental challenge and the puzzle-like aspects of it. Also it makes my forearms look boss, at least when I'm going consistently. I'm not a ridiculous hardbody (note the food section below), but I'm pretty fit.

I'm an occasional photographer; I very much enjoy the process but I haven't figured out what my goals are in terms of an end product, so it tends to go in fits and starts. These days it doesn't get much of my time.

My "personality" page says I'm "more sloppy". I don't know what that means. I feel like OK Cupid is judging me. All the rest of it feels about right, though.
What I’m doing with my life
School... sigh. Nearing the end... yay!

school frisbee school music school beer school frisbee beer school music food.
I’m really good at
Long philosophical discussions. Talking to people about science. Scratching kitties behind their ears. Communicating.
The first things people usually notice about me
My beard: it's big and bushy.
My dog: also big and bushy.
My height: I'm a touch over 6' and pushing 200 lbs. I'm a big dude.
My voice: Loud and deep. I've been told I should be a radio DJ, but the problem is I'm not good at talking about nothing for any length of time. Also I'm super self-conscious about how I sound recorded, just as everyone is.
My eyes: again, based on what others tell me. I call them green, but sometimes they look more blue. I mostly use them for seeing.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I'm mostly a non-fiction buff, both in books and movies - I just finished 1493, and I devoured Sex At Dawn in about 3 days. That said I have a soft spot for Ivan Doig's writing, and other coming-of-age in Montana books. I'm currently stalled in the middle of Wallace Stegner's "Wolf Willow". I'll get back to it at some point.

Movies - don't watch a lot, but I like a good arthouse flick - Delicatessen is a perennial favorite. It's dark, and very, very French. Most any well-made documentary will have me riveted (see "non-fiction" above). And of course I like a good action flick from time to time, though afterwards I always feel like I ate too much candy.

Music - I like all kinds of stuff, but I trend towards the folk/americana/alt-country end of the spectrum; Robbie Fulks, The Lonesome Sisters, Doug Paisley, Shovels and Rope, Steve Earle... But lest you think I'm a one-trick pony, I love Emily Wells, Tim Fite, The Roots, Chuck Prophet, Bobby Bare Jr... I can mix it up.

Food - I enjoy all of the food. I love to cook, especially for others; I make sourdough bread regularly, I can vegetables, I make my own chicken stock, and so on. I also love the Weary, Jak's, Sardine, Lao Laan-Xang, and so forth. I eat meat and love it, but I can cook vegetarian with the best of them. I make a few specialty breakfasts, but they're only available to close friends.
The six things I could never do without
My dog
My guitar
A Frisbee
Good food
Good music
Good friends
Someone to count my list items for me
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Science, frisbee, love, sex, and communication. Mostly frisbee.
On a typical Friday night I am
At a show, or at home cooking dinner. Maybe with a glass of bourbon.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I think I've admitted plenty, for the moment. I'm much more forthcoming in person.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 27–45
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating
You should message me if
If you approach life as a responsible hedonist.

You're a big ol' nerd. I love nerds.

You like beards. If you think beards are gross, well, don't bother.

If you don't get freaked out by a little dog hair on your clothes.