OkCupid is Free Online Dating.

**Ladies and gents, a word to the wise - I am currently engaged to be married, so chances are I'm not going to jump in the sack with you**

Self-summaries are all inevitably propaganda, but I'll take a crack at honesty anyway. You could call me a nerd with party girl tendencies, I guess. I'm the type of girl to voluntarily read literary theory on Chaucer. I'm also the type to drink heavily and pogo dance in the bar. I'm alternately idealistic and cynical, cocky and neurotic. I test dead-center between intro-and extroverted. These are facets that don't necessarily mean I have a fractured image of myself that begs reconciliation or explanation, so don't try to figure out which I am. They're all me.

While I'm on the subject of things you shouldn't bother with, I'll mention that you mightn't bother contacting me if you only like pencil-thin girls. This is something I've never been accused of being. Don't worry about this crushing me, I dig my curves. Other reasons not to contact me include: an intense desire to discuss sports without derision, attempts to convert me to any religion (most especially Christianity), or to convince me that heavy consumption of diet coke will eventually lead to cancer. These are conversations that will disappoint you.

And now the inevitable disclaimer ? I only have this account because a friend demanded I take the quizzes. Let's just try chatting, and see what happens. And yes, you can laugh, the screen name is a joke.

Mostly, I'm just going through withdrawals from craving a classroom setting.

They say it's your gender, but I think it's that I'm standing on your foot.

I'm counting all my books as one. Diet Coke is the second, and an internet connection as the third. Friendship, sexuality, and the will to live can round that out, and I could be relatively contented.

I was messaged by a gentleman with the following criticisms concerning my profile: its tone conveys "relentless individuality without any regard for [my] intense similarity to thousands of others," and that he was annoyed by "the complete lack of original thought yet an unblinking tone of novelty," (the preceding quotes are attributed to "an anonymous muppet," at the request of the aforementioned speaker, barring the contents of the brackets, which are mine). I post this here as a notice to others that I have been chastised for my lack of originality, in the hope that it shall save me scads of sifting through hate mail that I must assume this opinion is but the harbinger of. For the record, according to the MLA, it's no longer considered improper to end a sentence with a hanging preposition.