Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
My Hello, universe of OKC, it's Jared here, and I present to you
the awesomest man available in the greater Edmonton area.
Welcome to the abridged, re-appropriated profile of me! Now with
less rambling and more awesome (at least a 68% increase over
I'm here to look for a girl to spend time with have some fun, and
hopefully figure out how far you want to go. To assist you in
getting to know who I am, here are some overdone OKC profile
questions you can read:
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I work as a salesperson - which is a fancy way of saying I move
things from one location to another. When I am not doing this, or
sleeping, I am usually doing something on my computer.
You'll have to suffer the fact that I play video games, do lots of
streaming and basically live and breathe the internet. This is a
part of me that you're just going to have to accept.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Evidently, people tell me I'm great at most things, but I think
they're being polite, to tell you the truth. It would be better to
explain what I am bad at:
Distinguishing Smells and Tastes
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I have a pretty young spirit, talk quickly and use a lot of
Also, I'm really outspoken and prone to ranting about various
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Media? This is a pretty long topic, so I'll just mention one of
each (rather than the paragraphs of discographies and carefully
archived selections that I see everywhere):
Book: Crime & Punishment
Movie: Army of Darkness
Show: Jesus it's been forever since I watched one of these
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I spend way too much time thinking. Eventually the topics of my
thought processes get too dilute and numerous to catalog here.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Getting out of the house.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I think that the experience of dating is treated very differently
online. Men put a great deal of effort into contacting girls here,
but because of the vast numbers of men available, their efforts are
often brushed aside under the guise of "I think I can do better" -
but think - if that guy put that kind of effort up to you to your
face, you'd probably be impressed.
The next time some guy puts that effort towards you, maybe think
what it would have taken him to do such a thing (particularly if
he's not like me and is shy as all hell). This isn't a catalogue
with a list of available candidates. These are all real people, and
if you acted towards them in life how you do when you casually
brush the "next" button, you'd act differently. Wouldn't you?
Or maybe I'm just cisgendered white scum, who listens to me
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You should be interested in my culture, look adorable, and have a
positive attitude. You should also be a smart cookie. Peanut butter
is the best. I do not mind if you're a little quirky either.
I know most of y'all have a hard time messaging people on this
site, but fret not, for I have a solution! If you like my profile
and want to get to know me, but you don't quite know what to say or
fear you might be a little too awkward, send me a message, just say
"hi" or something - and I'll take care of the rest.
You should NOT message me if:
1) You are a man from Russia or Nigeria
2) If you are married, separated, or "just getting out of a bad
relationship". I am serious. I will find out. Take some time,
3) You are very clearly not ready, nor have the time for a
4) You are actually Nyarlathotep. Please, stop calling me. I told
you - you cannot devour my soul.
5) If you feel you live in a world where "microaggressions" exist,
we won't get along.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.