I wish I had the attention span to be a geek. Instead, I'm just a lazy nerd. I am filling out this profile thing in small steps because I'm just that easily distracted. This particular personality trait makes for 1- really fun conversations and 2- really frustrating conversations, depending on your level of seriousness/urgency on a given topic.

I like books. Big victorian novels about how to be a proper woman and get married (one of my more ironic literary preferences), big dorky fantasy novels, post-apocalyptic hilarity (and depressingness), satire satire satire.

As for the big life boxes: over-educated, queer, feminist, libra (i'm a pretty typical libra, and even though I don't necessarily believe in all that, it's a useful descriptor).

Oh, and I hate dates. Or at least things that feel like dates. I'll do it once or twice, because sometimes that's the only way to get to hang out with someone for the first time... but seriously. It needs to be casual for me to be comfortable. Actually, that's a pretty general rule with me. All things must be casual. If they are not, it feels self important and I just can't take 99% of stuff that seriously.

procrastinating. that's right. i'm a student. MA in English... thought I was gonna get a PhD... realized "no i'm not." hanging out in DC until I finish my degree, then hanging out wherever I can find a job. i'm not too particular about where I live. I liked Raleigh (in spite of it being southern) and I like DC (in spite of it being the city of the man). basically, i'm happy wherever I have friends, and that never takes too long. the only problem is that i'm building up a list of "places/people I have to visit every year" and it's going to get unmanageable soon.

- having a runny nose
- making lists that are not to do lists
- literary analysis
- surprising people with my redneckity past
- getting your mind off that thing that's bothering you
- dealing with my imperfections
- giggling
- YELLING ON THE INTERNET

Besides the holes in my face? (stop staring at my nostrils! no, really, i'm referring to the lip and nose ring. to my knowledge, there is nothing wrong with my nostrils.)

I'm basically a five year old with a large vocabulary and exceptional emotional intelligence.

Note: I am filling this question out like a month after making this profile because I really dislike answering this all the damn time. And now I will go on to answer it at great length.

Okay.

Books: Lady Audley's Secret, Daniel Deronda, Carmilla (hell yeah victorian lesbian vampire stories), Dreams of Trespass, Shame, anything Vonnegut (especially God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater), anything Atwood (especially Lady Oracle), Harry Potter-- all of them, Eragon, Eldest, City of Glass, The Belgariad-- whole series, Jane Eyre, Gender Outlaw, Terry Pratchett's Monstrous Regiment, Thief of Time, and Going Postal (but I want to read them all!), Fingersmithand I could tell you a bunch more if all my books were on the shelves instead of still in boxes.

Movies: If you want to know if I've seen something, the answer is probably no. But hey, maybe I'll surprise you. Harold and Maude, Frida, Kill Bill, Willow, Return to Oz, Chicago, Neverending Story, Forbidden Kingdom, Mulan, The Emperor's New Groove, Monsters, Inc., Finding Nemo, Ever After, Cruel Intentions, But I'm a Cheerleader, D.E.B.S, Amelie, The Graduate, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Lion King, Jungle Book, Chicago, Labyrinth, Pan's Labyrinth, Harry Potter, Wristcutters, A League of Their Own, Forrest Gump, Mean Girls, Witches

Music: Jesus. This one is tough. I like individual songs from most genres. Tend not to like specific bands. So here's what I can tell you: Meatloaf, Billy Joel, Bon Jovi, Bruce Springsteen. Tegan and Sara, Sleater-Kinney, Bitch and Animal, Peaches. Hank Williams Jr, Johnny Horton, Charlie Daniels. old Green Day, and a bunch of other punkish/alternative stuff, but I don't know enough of each band's work to list them here. SERIOUS weakness for 90s music from high school. and ridiculous 80s stuff. and chill 70s stuff. I know all the words, but I don't know the bands and I don't know the names of the songs.

Food: Okay. I fucking love food. I mostly eat terrible food. My diet improved a bit after a prolonged relationship with a vegan. No one will ever get me to stop eating exactly what I want-- it's just that the category "what I want" expanded a little. Hummus. I always want hummus and pita-- thomas's pita, not that dry King Pita bullshit. Wunderbar Bologna. Hebrew Nationals. Arbys. salad bars (my salads are NOT diet food). BONELESS BUFFALO WINGS. Pizza from upstate NY with frank's red hot and ranch. Cottage cheese, rice pudding. Carrots with ranch. Anything with ranch. Hunan beef, fried rice, spring rolls, hot and sour soup. Orange milano cookies. Tuna sandwiches. cheese cheese cheese. 2% Milk, Cran-Raspberry juice. Baked ziti, veggie lasagna, mom's spaghetti- extra cayenne pepper. chicken chimichangas from NC, non-chunky salsa, veggie quesadillas. eastern style bbq, fried okra, sweet tea. that crazy bbq/mustard sauce from red hot and blue. french fries. zucchini. beer beer beer.

- internets
- men's plain tshirts
- sleep. lots and lots of sleep.
- cartoons
- people. lots and lots of people.
- dirty, hole-in-the-wall hangouts. this includes my house.

tattoo ideas that I currently do not have enough money to fund. the money that i do not have.

my neverending existential crisis. except it's not really a crisis... it's more like a... circus. my neverending existential circus.

umm... sex. sex is important.

before I started working at a bar... I would have been on an adventure. My adventures tend to involve one or more of the following:
1- cheap beer
2- stolen objects
3- strangers
4- getting lost
5- something really gay
6- snort-laughter/yelling-laughter

but now, since I work at a bar... I'm working. le sad. working tends to involve:
1- good beer
2- being surly/sweet to my customers (at the same time)
3- tips
4- more good beer
5- getting harrassed by drunk people
6- fried food

My vagina is a diva, but I'm not. Oh, I'm not a very private person.

you lack a gender and/or can make me laugh.

i like boigirls, genderqueers, butches, ftms, androkids, and other boyish creatures who won't try to stick me in a femme genderbox.