Looking for a good time? Well, this profile may be the answer to your dreams, presuming your dreams weren't too weird. If you dreamt that the walls were screaming at you, this probably isn't the answer. Also, it may have been a fire alarm. You should probably check that.

If you haven't closed the tab by now, chances are you will be able to tolerate me. That's good enough for me.

I'm currently living in Leicester, trying to figure out what the hell to do with my life - scientific testing has revealed that "university" and "bugger all" are not currently acceptable answers, so my study continues. One day I hope to get the hell out of England and move to the Pacific Northwest - either Seattle or Vancouver, depending on whether America's remembered its sanity by the time I make my decision.

Random trivia, stopping people from pushing in front of me in a queue without looking like a dick, abandoning my dignity to achieve a goal. Not the only things I'm good at, but it's a fairly accurate sample.

* I'm small - which is odd, because I'm not, I just act small.
* I'm quiet in person, at least until I get out of large company. I have a tendency to drift into the background when more than four or five people are in a conversation that doesn't require my presence.
* When it's not short, my hair. It just sort of does what it wants regardless of my opinions on the matter, and I am basically accepting that it is a separate entity whose opinions on its self-expression trump mine.

Books:
* I go through phases of thinking that Anathem is the greatest [book ever published/pile of tripe ever inflicted on an unsuspecting public]. Generally anything that Neal Stephenson writes.
*Hitchhiker's Guide
*Discworld
*Farseer Trilogy and Tawny Man trilogy by Robin Hobb - probably my favourite non-Pratchett fantasy
*Anything Gaiman
*OH my god, A Song Of Ice And Fire.

TV:
*Friends, Will & Grace, other such shitty American sitcoms that I occasionally feel guilty about liking, before remembering that I don't actually have to give a shit about what other people think.
*The OC. See above, and also see "nerdy hot cute awkward Adam Brody" which pretty much hits every point on my checklist.
*Glee. This is the point where some of you will close the tab in disgust. Fuck you, I love it, I sing along sometimes, this is just something I do.
*Doctor Who, especially Steve Moffat episodes

Music:
*Pretty much anything that doesn't sound designed to give people headaches and/or teenage girls screams of delight. Unfortunately, the Forbidden Category encompasses a lot of things.
*Symphonic Metal, apparently
*Musical soundtracks. Look, it SAYS gay at the top of the page, you were warned.

1. My laptop
2. Friends
3. Oxygen, nutrients, water, other smartarse answers
4. A notepad and pen
5. A decent book
6. Somewhere soft to sleep

* Chilling out nice
* Relaxing all cool
* Shooting some b-ball outside of the school

Or at least until a couple of guys who were up to no good started making trouble in the neighbourhood. Now I'm more likely to be relaxing at home, watching a movie, or in general just being far away from "clubbings" and "ravings". Loud repetitive dance music turns my brain into the bad sort of mush - if I can't have a decent conversation somewhere without screaming, I don't want to be there. The last sentence is proof that I am turning into my mother, but this is something that we will both have to deal with.

If you want a reasoned and thorough discourse on the finer details of pre-dreadnoughts, and of the USS Maine in particular, then I am not your man. Be off with you! Shoo!

If, however, you have read all of this profile (or at least the important bits and ignored the rest) then it probably wouldn't be the worst idea in the world to message me. Probably, anyway. No guarantees.