Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Affable. Amusing. Assertive. Brash. Confident. These are the ABC's
of me. (There are three A's because I am triple-A quality.)
I wrote that with probably the biggest shit-eating grin that has
ever existed and I feel neither shame nor remorse.
I like to get loud and am by nature a boisterous person. To me,
life is all about laughing and being ridiculous. I abhor blandness
in people. I like to call this trait ostentenacity, which sounds
better than it looks typed. And is also a lie, I've never said that
before now. But I do like it.
I'm not from Texas, but I've lived here for half my life.
Unfortunately much of that time was in small towns, but now that
I'm in a city I plan to never, ever live outside an urban area.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm currently trying to improve myself in ways I had ignored
before. I'm learning to cook and am exercising after being involved
in the Great Weight Debacle of 2011. I'm also working to improve my
style, because one day a man wakes up and realizes that a limit
must be placed on how often a Hawaiian shirt is worn.
That limit is once, maybe twice a week.
I'm learning how to sew. Like, with a machine and everything. I
want to make my own clothes. And possibly someone else's,
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I have often been told that I am very funny. Hilarious, even. If
you want to laugh, I am your man.
I can eat as many tacos as any man can eat (2-3).
I have a great sense of space and am able to create aesthetically
pleasing arrangements of furniture when a bed is not involved. Beds
take up too much space, I don't know what to do with them. Besides
I am proudly able to drink as much whiskey as any ten men can
drink. Provided they are small men. If they are normal sized men,
then five of them.
I do a really good karaoke of Peggy Lee's Fever. My Cracklin Rosie,
however, will knock your socks off.
If called upon I can prove myself not an unworthy participant on
the dance floor.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
You may be surprised to know this, but I am often mistaken for an
ambulatory haircut. Some of my closest friends still believe I am
an Afro that swears and drinks their liquor.
I'm clever. I say this without presumption, as I'm not the smartest
or most learned person in the room unless it's just me and my cat,
but I have a quick mind that makes connections easily, so I can at
least be witty.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I love to read! Mostly sci-fi and fantasy, but I have a decent
collection of noir novels so that I can walk down more aisles at
Half-Price looking for more. Terry Pratchett is probably my
favorite author, and I have reread Discworld novels so much that I
once surprised my friends on the depth of my knowledge.
I read comics as well because I am an adult geek and I can spend my
money however I like. I did not, however, read them when I was a
kid geek. Mainly because I did not have money to spend however I
liked. But now I can read about Batman and Atomic Robo while I
drink some Kool-Aid. Please note, I will not actually drink
Kool-Aid. It tastes terrible.
I don't watch a lot of ongoing tv, as I cancelled my cable, but I
do own a number of box sets, mostly cartoons and sci-fi. I do,
however, have friends that pay for tv and I go to their place to
stay current on series they are watching, like Dr. Who and
Adventure Time. Farscape is probably my favorite series to rewatch
that I own.
I love watching Kung-Fu, Blaxploitation and B movies with other
people. I am always willing to sit down and watch a spectacle that
isn't a horror film. I think that everyone in those acts stupid as
hell and it irritates me because I would have just set the entirety
of East Texas on fire before getting chainsawed by an inbred
redneck. It's East Texas, who's gonna miss it anyway?
Other than that, I pretty much watch anything else, as it seems I
have a weakness for moving pictures to the point where I can't
sleep if a tv is on.
I feel that Speed Racer is the number one Feel Good movie of all
time. Understandably, you may not feel the same way. We don't have
to talk about it if that's the case. If it's not, let's fuckin'
watch Speed Racer.
My taste in music is fairly varied and Pandora keeps making it
worse. New Wave, irish folk, afro-rock, mariachi, lounge, hiphop,
zydeco. I could keep going but you get the idea. Out of everything,
my favorite band is Clutch. I might like your dad's southern rock
All of my favorite food can be eaten out of a hand and bought off a
truck. Gyros, pizza, tacos, hotdogs. And technically ramen but that
is due to a very specific truck that no longer runs and tricked me
into thinking it was but instead was serving burgers.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I have a collection of Hawaiian shirts because they are what I
exclusively wore for about fifteen years. I keep them for mostly
nostalgic reasons now, but even though I don't wear them much
anymore I am not ready to open a closet that isn't filled with
I don't think a day goes by where I don't have at least a glass of
milk. It is delicious and refreshing.
I will always need something to read.
I need a drink. A blended whiskey with ginger beer is preferred but
whatever you have is fine.
I enjoy pornographic material.
I require at least one article of clothing that is purple. My
favorite currently are pants.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
What I need to get from the grocery store. And shoes. And how
infrastructure in this country is so far behind what is required to
properly support the populace in most of our major cities. Why
Nightwing should be Asian. If my jokes and/or stories work for
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Exhausted from work, so something low key. Also I am the kind of
guy that still likes to go to certain movies on opening night. But
Saturday night, that's when the party is! Karaoke, drinking at a
friend's, the occasional club or bar. I like doing things around
people and I enjoy making new friends! I started going to roller
derby with my friends and I think it's the best.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I fucking love Supertramp.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You have a perverse sense of humor. Please, sit with me in the
corner of a restaurant and make wry comments about strangers.
People call you weird.
You call yourself weird.
You wanna watch some cartoons.
You want to go to a con dressed as a lazy superhero.
You are looking for an object containing the properties of
Bombasticity. I have that object.
I'm a sucker for a woman in a Starfleet uniform.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.