Morning folks! Summary, eh? Well, I'm a mixture of haphazard and obsessive-compulsive. I can't stop my brain from thinking sometimes. I have no ability to manage my time because I'm always being distracted by tiny tiny details. I like to put things off as much as possible so I can spend more time chilling out as of the now.

There used to be a bit here whining about grammar, but it didn't stop people LOLing at me in messages, so I figure it was just wasting valuable space!

I have big hair and I'm quite pleased with that - I like to make it into shapes whenever the chance arises. I do keep meaning to have it hacked back somewhat, but they never take quite as much off as I think I've asked for and as I keep leaving it longer and longer between haircuts, it's getting bigger as a long-term average.

I have an internet alter-ego and usually go under the name Funkster, but that username was already taken when I arrived here. Please don't think of me with the -B part... I am merely Funkster, or Olly Funkster if you know me well enough :o)

I have a webble site at www.funkster.org if you're interested, or you can just type my name into Google :o)

For my day job I design small, ingenious devices. Currently working in the automotive industry though would love to move into lifestyle consumer stuff and then ideally nanotechnology (might be waiting a while before jobs are available in that arena though!).

Aside from that, I spend my time hitting cars with hammers (remarkably therapeutic!), hitting drums with sticks, playing guitar (yes, with my fingers), removing old wallpaper from my house, sitting, listening to music and sitting. Oh, and drinking tea.

- Making things (may include but not limited to: hats, beats, metal shapes, sideways images, stews, biscuits)

- Spelling

- Driving in circles, or straight lines

- Taking It Easy

I'm Really Bad At

- Writing when it's meant to mean something

- Remembering Your Name

- Bothering

My sideburns! I have these because I am in fact a Victorian mechanical engineer, building steam trains and bridges and such. Being a Gentleman corrals quite a lot of respect, don'tcherknow!

My hair also seems to get a few mentions... at least it does when it's in large mode, which is usually the case towards the end of any good night out.

Movies... well, I'm a bit of a fiend for them. My collection currently stands at about 400, of all kinds of genres but I have a soft spot for anything that makes you think, and keeps revealing more details on subsequent viewings.

I employ a kind of karmic reward system when I go to the cinema - by watching the credits, right to the end, every time I see a film for the first time, I give something back to all the crew that made it. All those people can rest peacefully knowing that someone has seen their name and knows what job they did. This system has ensured that I haven't paid to see a bad film for several years :o)

Books... anything by Douglas Adams, Terry Pratchett, Robert Rankin, William Gibson, Neal Stephenson, Bill Bryson, Neil Gaiman, and other stuff like that. I have never read any of the lord of the rings or harry potter books and I do not intend to change that. I also dabble occasionally in popular science, even though I'm aware that it isn't in fact very scientific in its presentation.

Food... I'm particularly fond of spicy food... Indian, Indonesian, Thai, Chinese - or at least the English restaurant versions of those cultures' cuisine! I'm not too fussy when it comes to grub, though. Sadly I'm no chef, but I do enjoy making a bit of an effort to cook when I have the time and energy (which is all too infrequent) and I grow my own chillies, tomatoes and other herbs, for the use of.

And finally... music. My collection includes some of, all of, or more than: Bleepy electronica; Jazz; Funk; Hip-hop; Breakbeats; Soul; Clever guitar music; beautifully executed contemplative stuff. I am also a complete fiend for innovative cover versions and cut-ups.

Petrol, air, biscuits, biscuits, biscuits, biscuits.

Unless, that is, the function math.random returned with greater than 0.95 in this bit of script contained within the page you are viewing:

if (Math.random()

document.write(The SIX things I could never do without:");

else

document.write (What I think about while masturbating:");

...in which case, naked ladies. I guess that's about 5% of the time (unless math.random is gaussian, in which case much less) which isn't really a fair representation of how much of my time is spent thinking about naked ladies.

Really tiny details like how air will flow over a bump on a smooth surface; how few women there are in my line of work; how rubbish our elected government is; what shape I could make my hair into; what's for tea.

Pining for the fjords

I own a Volkswagen and it seems that, contrary to what is generally acknowledged, it is actually quite comfortable in the back.

... you like biscuits, have black hair, and are mobile. Or, if you are a musician, or maybe a bit of a geek.

It's worth noting that my IM thing on here doesn't work for incoming messages, it's best to send a normal mail instead :o)