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31 Brooklyn, NY Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 22–34
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Online now!
Asian, Middle Eastern, Black, Native American, Indian, Pacific Islander, Hispanic / Latin, White, Other
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Atheism, and laughing about it
Graduated from university
Strictly monogamous
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Poorly), Ilongo (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Apparently I'm INTJ...I'm not quite sure what this mean, but if pressed to answer I think it means I'm boring?

I don't really know how to lie or boast in order to make myself seem cooler or more interesting than I actually am. Which seems like the thing to do in online dating.

I have a scar on my forehead. Did I get it:
1) In a knife fight while saving a puppy from a burning building;
2) From a wizard trying to kill me when I was a baby; or
3) Running into a door when I was 3.

Ok, I lied. I'm great at boasting.

I didn't see snow until I was like, 24, so every winter when it snows I'm like a child.

There I go again.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Somehow staggering into work in midtown only about 5 minutes late. Wearing a tie most days even though I don't have to because that's just how I roll. Pointlessly. I also am quite uncomfortable with how my boss seems to imply that I'm going to have his job in a couple years, because I dislike the thought of being so much of an adult that I'm stuck in some office with a multi-year plan. And by imply, I mean he flat out told me.

Sometimes I write...a lot. But mostly to stem my oncoming insanity. I sorta dream of becoming a hermit in the woods, writing of the madness that envelopes me. I don't consider myself that great of a writer, but it's kinda fun.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Being modest.

Making jokes that only I think are funny...My profile is filled with them. Don't let that make you think I don't take this seriously! Woo online dating!
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Somebody told me I look like a younger, less angry Marc Maron. My first reaction was disappointment about the part where I was less angry...
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Everything is Illuminated. The Grapes of Wrath. I absolutely loved The Road, but just can't get into Cormac McCarthy's other stuff, I don't know why (No Country for Old Men was decent). I like some sci fi and fantasy. ASoIaF is great. Harry Potter of course.

Graphic Novels: The Sandman, Watchmen, Ex Machina, Y: The Last Man. These are all magnificent books.
Currently reading: The Walking Dead, Fables, Saga, Irredeemable, Maus, Locke and Key, Deadpool. I also signed up for Marvel Unlimited, so that's been taking up a lot of my reading time. Using it to read some Runaways, because I will read anything Brian K Vaughn touches.

Movies: So many I can barely remember them all. It's rare that I'll actually dislike a movie. But here are some good-uns. Pan's Labyrinth, Eternal Sunshine, In Bruges, Children of Men, I dig the Star Wars movies, Rian Johnson movies are great, as are most Cohen Brothers movies. Also Edgar Wright movies. So many. I see movies quite regularly Fridays after work...alone...cause I'm awesome.

TV Shows: Shows that currently air...House of Cards, Game of Thrones, Mad Men, True Detective, The Walking Dead, Archer, Orange is the new Black, The Americans. I would put an RIP section for shows we've lost, but there would be too many to name. Although yes, I am one of those people that say Breaking Bad and The Wire are the top two. I feel like I'm the only person in the world who loved Bojack Horseman.

Music: Loudon Wainwright III and Tom Waits are my top two. I would say my two favorite genres are the Blues and Irish rock/folk.
My iPhone has music from both The Carter Family and NoFX...let that tell you what it will.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.

Also, fuck Maslow. Who does he think he is?
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Why life doesn't follow the rules of Joseph Campbell.

How many random references and/or big words I can throw out to make people think I'm smart.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Hm...I tend to go to movies after work all by myself, because I am awesome like that. Then after that sometimes I'll meet friends and go drink around Williamsburg with all the hipsters. I found a bar that was playing Mad Men on the TVs one time. It was pretty rad. The next time I went there Law and Order: Child Rape Division was on...and the time after that Yellow Submarine. I'm not sure I'm following the narrative.

How come Friday night isn't just called Frinight? Mic drop!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My cat is named after a character from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. See? I told you I don't know how to lie...because that definitely should be replaced with one.

I enjoy video games...yeah. I tell myself it's mostly as a way to hang out with a couple good friends that don't live in New York, but that's just rationalization. Video games are fun.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're into (obscure?) boardgames and drinking, as those are two of my favorite past-times.

I'm honestly terrible at sending messages. I refuse to use anything scripted. Half the time I just say stupid shit, and the other half I say inane shit. But that's just who I am. Stupid and inane.

If you want to go out and do something...comedy clubs are fun. I want to start playing pool again, but it's just too expensive to go alone, haha. I want to start going to shows and such again as well, but most of my friends aren't really into that. Also if you'd be interested in Comic Conventions or going to PAX East with me, that'd be rad. Also baseball or basketball games (The US Open too!). Look, basically I find enjoyment in's actually a bad thing at times because I can't really focus on one hobby.

Also...please please please know the difference between various homonyms and homophones. And hominids, but that's really for your own sake more than anything.

Did I mention I make awful jokes?