——desolate, the world is; who would be my cloth
I build a paradise for my solitude, and a poet told me the solitude is another implied meaning for independence.
Life is not easy, dealing with it, dealing with it. I will be mature and grow up slowly and gradually.
I was born in a broken family. My mother and my father, they fight with each other everyday. They sent me to boarding school at the age of 12 years old. I left them from when I was little. I bury all my tears alone with my pillows, in my dream. I never be a lucky kid.
Through the whole of my life, I was critized that I don't like or behave like a girl. I hate it from the bottom of my heart. I have compulsive disorder, always want to be perfect, outstanding, excellent. Yes, I seriously mean it. I want to be better than guys, in all aspects, otherwise I don't feel comfortabe. I don't give a fuck whether you approve it or not. You don't know who I am? You gonna get it! This is who I am!
I hate the inequality between male and female, yes, I am fucking hate it, hate it from the deep, deep, inside of me.
The left part of my brain belong to Math, logic.
The right part of my brain belong to art, literature, imaginations.
I don't give up either of them.
My goal is to work for the top investment bank. Recently I found it seriously a mistake give up Math for Media. I am wrong. I like Math more than writing, but I plan to write.
Economy is a Math question. I don't give a fuck whether you agree with it or not.
I never go down to earth. I wish I can be special, different, outstanding, and perfect. I speak to myself times. I scream loudly when nobody is around.
In my views, there is only one kind of women are beautiful: strong women. Others are wusses!