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38 M Baltimore, MD

My Details

Last Online
Apr 10
Hispanic / Latin, White
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Leo, but it doesn’t matter
Relationship Status
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Has dogs and likes cats

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My self-summary
* I am in a relationship - just restored my account to help a couple of long-distance friends stalk perspective dates/mates *
6'1/4", 176lbs. , bats right, throws right, quick first step, decent mid-range jumper, good car control, runs precise routes, tenacious defender, romantic. Imma just go ahead and go out on a very long, shaky limb here and take a pro-shirtless photo your photos, obviously...
What I’m doing with my life
Not to brag, but I'm a pretty well known Math Debater(say this term out loud for some guaranteed hilarity), and my reputation as a cunning linguist is, um, spreading...For realsies though, I work in real estate in a couple of different ways and as an occasional paralegal. What I really like doing are renovations, especially the design aspects of those projects. There's some new things in the works, hopefully involving green renovation. I've found that many women get very interested when I use the word "green" - except in sentences like: "Do you have any idea what this green stuff under my balls might be...?". * I have been strongly advised by multiple female friends to redact that last sentence, but in the spirit of personality and sense-of-humor-revealing honesty, it remains.* I like what I do pretty well, and they are the sort of jobs that afford me a fair amount of autonomy and free time (this seems to have diminished, recently...) for other pursuits. I have raced both cars and motorcycles in the past, and want/hope to get back into one or the other (or both) soon. Because of a relatively recent move back home from Seattle, I am currently motorcycle-less. Motorcycle-lessness is the bane of my existence. If hooded sweat-shirts didn't exist I would be a very, very sad man...I am getting back into road-cycling - I am not about to get into bike shorts - those belong on ladies in Wreckx-N-Effect videos!
I’m really good at
Listening, motorcycle-riding, car-driving, pull-ups, bar-trivia, hyphenating, making my case, seeing through people's bullshit, procrastinating, lucid-dreaming, political arguing (debating,discoursing...?), being misunderstood, keeping t-shirts for 10+ years, writing, getting too fired up, average-at-best- freestyling (with moments of utter brilliance sprinkled in - usually when there are no witnesses) , being cynical, not being cynical, empathizing, making very inappropriate jokes, accidentally cursing around children, being loved by said children, purposefully cursing around sporting events, having a catch and forgetting everything I need to buy the moment I cross the threshold of a supermarket.
The first things people usually notice about me
The shaved dome, and the fact that i am crushing it on the dance floor. I have been told that my default facial expression tends towards scowlishness (coined!) - sorry about that. Well, unless I am, in fact, scowling.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Nicholson Baker, Michael Chabon and Haruki Murakami are favorites. I just finished "Out Stealing Horses" by Per Petterson, and liked it quite a bit. Currently, "Devil in the White City" resides on the night stand, as well as 3 Kate Atkinson mysteries that I believe are related (just crushed all 3 in ten days - very engrossing!). An enormous (and I fear destined to go unread) Delilo work has been relegated to the dusty under-the-night-stand square of floor. To make Don not feel so bad, I bought a much slimmer and seemingly less Pynchon-esque book of his to read next. Movies: Rad and Oldboy have taken a spin in the DVD player more than a few times. La Haine is an all-time favorite. I don't think that Jurassic Park is the best movie ever by any means, but it is a perfectly paced and structured movie. The best movie ever made certainly must be House Party. R Kelly's Trapped in the Closet, obviously, resides in a pantheon all its own. I'm kind of a hyper-critical movie nerd, but I try to keep an open mind and think any genre or budget can produce the horrible or the sublime. Music: underground hip-hop (mostly from the "golden era" - '92-'98 or so) some jungle, turntablism in general, Baltimore Club!!!. Nas' Illmatic is as close to perfection as an album can get. I'm attempting to learn more about "bands" or whatever, and am open to suggestions. Food: crab cake subs. I used to have a very long list here, as many people do, but i ended up truncating it. I don't think its really all that important to look at someone's profile and say, "oh snap, we like the same bands and authors." In my experience, those kind of commonalities are nice, but can also serve to mask deeper, more elemental dissonance. Also, people like some pretty terrible music these days. That's People with a capitol P - not you. I'm sure all of the music that you like is just super...
The six things I could never do without
Sucking at math
I spend a lot of time thinking about
My "saved-bugs-by-painstakingly-catching-and-releasing-them" TO "just-straight-up-murdered-them" ratio. I feel like i may be at 80/20, which to me seems like, over the course of 37 years, maybe I should a have a tiny statue erected in my honor by the bug community. Are statues of living people appropriate? They give you a bust when you get elected to the NFL hall of fame...maybe just a bust, then. Probably easier for tiny insects anyway...

Also, what i can do to try to make the world a better place.

And, inventions. Weird, unrealized, million (hundred) dollar inventions.

If the comparative overlongness of the profile I so innocently constructed means that I am a megalomaniacal prick? I'm probably far too lazy to truly be a megalomaniac...

Is it at all fair that straight guys can't be referred to as "sassy"...?

There are a shocking number of photos of girls lying on tigers on this website...

Why it annoys me so when ladies write some variation of: "...I like all music, except rap!". You don't know what the hell you are talking about. Guys may do this also - I don't read their profiles...Even more annoying: "...I like all music, except rap and country" - as if these two disparate genres are obviously the two extreme ends of the musical scale (pun unintended)...But yes, country can indeed get the bozak!
On a typical Friday night I am
Out with friends. Or the opposite (home with enemies, I guess I meant...?).
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom. With a BK Big Fish sandwich. I have a VCR just to watch one favorite, high-school era porn - in addition to a recording of the Ravens' Super Bowl victory, which I watch through tear-filled eyes with a box of Kleenex. *Edit - This last sentence was written before the ever-so-glorious second Ravens' Super Bowl victory, therefore it refers to 2001...* Actually, I just realized I watch both of those videos with a box of Kleenex. (I'm also good at run-on sentences) Sad Edit: The VCR is in VCR Heaven, or possible VCR Hell considering what had passed through it's four heads during it's lifetime. RIP!

Additionally , I have an intense, occasionally overwhelming case of selachophobia - which is the fear of sharks. I haven't been in an ocean since I was about 12. Well, that's wrong - I was in Miami five years ago and there were jet ski rentals, and I really, really like jet skis. But seriously, I even get scared in pools.

How is it that "How to Train Your Dragon" is not an awesome, "Game of Thrones-esque" porno movie?!? We could produce it, future lady-friend, I have the funding in place....just sayin'.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 27–37
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if can actually teach me how to Dougie (this reference should tell you how long I've had this profile, so feel free to substitute a more current, equivalent, similarly hard to grasp dance craze). You think its cool to get very excited upon seeing that "The Karate Kid" has successfully been recorded on the dvr, and then also think its mandatory to then yell "what the fuck!" when for some reason horrible Will Smith's progeny appears on your TV screen. *I think I should not be so hard on Will...i don't think he's that great of an actor, but he seems like an okay, if somewhat self-absorbed, guy.Though, it always rubs me the wrong way when people have hard-set opinions of celebrities they have never met, so I should also refrain from this behavior. I'm The Rapper, He's The DJ is an honestly great, deliciously goofy album - do yourself a favor!* You also notice B.O.'s inexplicable, recent comeback, and feel that something needs to be done about it. You know who Valentino Rossi is. You secretly wish I was Valentino Rossi. Ummm, I'm pretty intense and opinionated, but someone recently told me I have a heart of gold. Maybe a heart of bronze, at best...