NEW AND IMPROVED! PROFILE VERSION 2.0!

"Every jumbled pile of person has a thinking part that wonders what the part that isn't thinking isn't thinking of."

Salutations, all! For those inclined to read this, my name is Graham. Yes, like the cracker. Yes, I've heard it before. Do I mind you calling me that? It all depends.

Hopeless romanticism is the game and I'm playing it. I've always considered myself a gentleman and really do have sort of an idealized vision of romance. I sometimes wish that it were the 1920's or some bygone era where men were gentlemen and women were ladies. I'd be very much inclined to buy you your favorite flower. I am a very cuddly, holding hands sort of person. Affection is very important to me and it is something that I love to give.

"I don't want to set the world on fire...I just want to start a flame in your heart."

I absolutely relish in British humor and dry humor and find that laughing and humor is one of the most important things in my life. I also highly value intelligence. I'm not saying that I haven't done or said stupid things, I'm just saying that I am very happy to be as educated as I am. Intelligence is very attractive to me...most likely because it's becoming a rare quality. A robust lexicon is also very appealing. Having good conversations and laughing and enjoying verbal exchange can be a pleasure. I like words a lot and I really should get to know them better; they can be quite fun to play with.

I'm not a party-person in any sense; it's just not my scene (neither are drugs, smoking, or heavy drinking). I can be very quiet and shy sometimes and I really don't care too much for crowds, which is probably why I don't much enjoy parties. Throngs of people tend to get on my nerves rather than excite me. I'm far happier with just a small group of friends playing games, watching a movie, or just having some fun conversation.

I enjoy video games immensely (from the classics to the new). For more information about my taste in video games, please see, "My favorite books, movies, music, and food" and look under "Video games". On the way, you may also want to sample our gift shop.

"You are likely to be eaten by a grue."

Welcome to the GSM867 Gift Shop!
Current Inventory:
- Thirty-seven (37) "I visited Graham's profile and all I got was this lousy T-shirt!" T-shirts
- Fifteen (15) GSM867 snowglobes
- One (1) life-size Graham (available while supplies last)

Currently, I'm working as video game tester for Konami. I don't plan on testing forever, I frankly don't think I could. I'd love to move up into the design areas and help with concept art or story 'cause I love being creative.

If that doesn't work out for me, I'm also very interested in illustration and graphic design. I have several ideas for graphic novels, and it'd be really cool to see those ideas come to fruition. My current works in progress are *CLASSIFIED* and *CLASSIFIED*.

Drawing, namely cartooning. I have done a couple more "realistic" drawings but they still tend to hold an edge of stylization, which pleases me 'cause it still looks like something I drew.

I'm probably better at the accordion than most people. I really should get to practicing it more. One of my goals on said instrument is to be able to play video game music effectively. I was pretty devastated when I discovered that all the times I'd been playing the "A Music" from Tetris that I'd actually been playing it in the wrong key...maybe nobody will notice...

I'd like to think I'm really good at video games...I'm not BAD at video games, that's for sure. I just know that in a multiplayer environment I'm not always the best but it's no biggie. I play to enjoy not to boost my ego.

I'm really good at being a stickler about grammar and punctuation. I'm one of the only people I know who will actually chat with proper grammar.

Probably my sense of humor or the way that I dress...I don't know, what do you notice?

I know that once one of my friends noticed that the irises in my eyes look like they're made out of marble and after awhile it freaked her out.

That being said, I do NOT have two glass eyes.

Favorites? I'm not too good with favorites, mostly because what I like depends on my mood so, let's just go with genres, shall we?

Books: Comedic fiction, British literature, graphic novels...a few examples include The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Jeeves & Wooster, Jeff Smith's Bone, Paradise Lost, and The Zombie Survival Guide.

Movies: Animation (Pixar's brand of CGI, hand-animated, or stop-motion), action, romance, suspense, comedy...basically if it has a good plot, I'll enjoy it. Although, I really don't enjoy the brand of comedy usually linked with Seth Rogen or Will Ferrell. Sorry. Here's a small sampling of my DVD movie collection: WALL·E, Alien, Army of Darkness, Big Fish, Back to the Future, The Iron Giant, Pan's Labyrinth, and To Kill a Mockingbird.

Television: I have never had cable and frankly find that TV nowadays is not really worth watching. In fact, all of the TV that I'd prefer to watch I own on DVD, which includes a lot of British comedy. A couple examples of my TV DVD collection include: Monty Python's Flying Circus, Blackadder, Jeeves & Wooster, King of the Hill, The Simpsons, and Samurai Jack.

Music: As a general rule anything from the 80's. I will say that one of my favorite bands is They Might Be Giants. Bonus points for you if you know them! I'm not really very keen on rap or hip-hop (just not something I can get into) but I do also enjoy alternative rock and oldies...like The Penguins or The Ink Spots. Oh, and I love Queen but then again, who doesn't? If you suffer from not liking Queen, place headphones over your ears, insert a Queen CD into your player (or add Queen tracks to your MP3 player of choice), and apply liberally.

Food: I'm very fond of burgers...I'm also very fond of Italian food. I'd have to say that as far as spicy things go, though, I'm a bit of a lightweight.

Added bonus!
Video games: I'm a pretty big Nintendo fan (I have every system with the exception of Virtual Boy), though as of late I've moved further from consoles and more onto PC games. I'm a fan of the old and the new and enjoy multitudes of genres. Some of my favorite games include: the Half-Life series, Team Fortress 2, and the Fallout series, though I assure you that there are many, many, many, many, many more that I enjoy. If you happen to be on Steam, feel free to add me: mcguire867.

1. Air
2. Humor
3. Intelligence
4. Romance
5. Art
6. Video games

(The only reason why friends and family are not on this list is because...well, c'mon. They're friends and family. Of COURSE, I couldn't live without them!)

How I would really love to meet someone special, who I could spend my free time with.

"I can dim the lights and sing you songs filled with sad things,
We can do the tango just for two,
I can serenade and gently play on your heartstrings,
Be a Valentino just for you..."

I really do think about love a lot. I hope that someday it will find me.

I could be playing video games that I just having time off. I tend to enjoy doing things and going places with a special someone, and seeing as how I have no one at the moment, I haven't been doing so. Maybe you'll change that?

Occasionally, I'll hit up a Dave & Buster's with my friends for some air hockey and arcade game playing.

I can be a little paranoid about things, sometimes. I am not a "man's man", I tend to be far more sensitive about things.

If something in a book/game/movie is tragic/sad/touching enough, yes, I will cry.

I love dressing up in a snappy fashion, whether there be a point to it or not. I'm one bowler hat and a few minor details away from having a perfect 1920's outfit.

Oh, and I don't like Chinese food. *Dun dun DUN!*

I'm also going to admit that on Wikipedia, I was the one who added the "Video Game Culture" section to the "Crowbar" article, detailing how it is a key weapon in Half-Life and that Gordon Freeman is rarely seen without one. The section still remains today.

If after plowing through the above you're still interested in me, if you would join me by my side during a zombie apocalypse, if you're interested in the life-size Graham from our Gift Shop, or if you're an affectionate romantic looking for the same. :)

I'M GOING TO BE HONEST, IF YOU'RE A SMOKER OR A DRUG USER THEN WE REALLY DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DISCUSS. CALL ME WHAT YOU WILL, AND I'M SORRY, BUT I JUST DON'T HAVE ANY TOLERANCE WHATSOEVER FOR THAT SORT OF THING. THE ONLY REASON THAT THIS IS IN BOLD IS BECAUSE SOME PEOPLE STILL DON'T READ IT.