So this is all about me, wow, my ego is so happy for this chance to shine! So, who AM I? Or more interestingly, what am I???
Well, I guess I would have to say that I am this weird point where all these memories I have of my past meet all these ideas and dreams I have of my future. What do you think you are?

Alright, I can't really think of anything else I want to write here, so this is what my soon to be distant lover, who probably knows me as well as anyone, says of me:

"Ganesha is a philosopher...always contemplating, always asking the deeper, harder questions, always exploring the further edges of realms of thought....sometimes a tortured soul with the weight of the world, sometimes thegiddiestmostchildlikeandplayfulpup, overflowing with joy and excitement and belief in infinite potential. He is the most affectionate and sweetest lover I've had.

He loves the Earth and the plants and animals and rocks and water and weather and people. He finds most pleasure in the simple things of life. He prefers to sleep on the ground under the stars. He is an excellent cook and LOVES food.

He is the most honest/truthful/real human being I have ever had the pleasure of attempting to be truly and wholly myself with. If you don't like bullshit and veils and masks and fakeness, you will LOVE Ganesha. He helps me unearth the things that I am trying to hide from myself."

And oh yes, my experience of monogamy is that it is really not something which appeals, or even works for me, I love who I want to when I want to how I want to, assuming it is mutual of course, and I am not exaggerating when I say I would rather die than loose this most basic of freedoms.

Well, there is the greater picture which involves the story of ME and how I came to be contained in this separate body and mind, why I frequently resist my life when things happen to me which I think shouldn't, or I have done something I think I shouldn't have done.

So, in this greater picture I am learning that everything is OK, including all human ignorance. I don't know if this is really something which I am doing, more something life has been doing to me, but it amounts to the same thing.

In the more day to day arena of 'my life' I feel my life moving back into a time of building structures, but in a new way, or more a reeeeeaaaly old way, using mostly whatever is already available around the site or locally. For those of you who are not in the know, this is using methods like: cob, straw bale, wattle and daub, log cabins, cordwood, wood shingles, sod roofs, thatched roofs, earth floors, rammed earth, straw-clay, round pole, etc. etc.
I'm looking to gain more experience building a few structures around Arizona, probably out in the boonies where there are no building codes, hopefully in a community with cool people who want to help and learn and who have huge gardens with food to share.
Do you know of any?

And most recently (the last few days) I have been building myself a little shelter in the desert out on a forest Rd, where I have been residing since I got the roof up on Sunday. There is no rent to pay (so far anyway) and the view is awesome.

Well I'm pretty fucking good at being me, and swearing, I think I swear effectively and communicatively, in a way which is both natural and expressive.
And I am obviously good at being very casual and suave. When I don't think about what I am saying but just speak I usually impress myself and amuse others.
I am good at listening, even when I don't want to and I am eternally grateful for this.
I am, a handy man. Yes, i fix things and build things and love the skills and tools I have access to.
And I'm really good at sex (I know I'm not the only guy who thinks this), although it fluctuates a great deal depending on the situation, the more in-love I feel the more intense and real and AMAZING the experience.

Well, I would guess my height, my recently grown huge beard, my unique fashion sense, (tights made out of a sweater, same clothes for a whole season) bare feet and my feeling of confidence. But I could be totally wrong and people notice totally different things...

Ishmeal, fight club, the foragers harvest, any music i can play and sing on guitar, and I love food. I have developed my own style of cooking using whole foods to make healthy, delicious quick foods with limited ingredients in a variety of situations (chocolate moose pie in a tipi anyone?)
I like a large number of books and movies but can never remember their names at times like these, sorry. How do you people keep track of these things? I fucking love Whitman and other writers who expose my freedom to me.
I am currently reading Moby Dick, for my own reasons, slow fucking going let me tell you. I was last reading 'There is nothing wrong with you' by Cheri Huber, Thoreau, and a tiny short book by Luis Amour, a book about the use of hallucinogenics by native peoples in S. America and a book about how women are like wolves, which I think is quite true.

I have learned from experience that I generally do without whatever I don't currently have. The things I prefer not to do without are:
my knife
time alone
realizing that nothing, not nothing really matters
a hot shower, or bath or sweat once in a while
fire or flame, and water (cheesy I know, but true)

Sex. ;-)
well, I guess I don't really think about sex so much as feel it, but I do feel very sexual around certain people. But whatever, I think a lot, too much in my opinion, but what do you know, that is another opinion, so there you go. The main reason I love sex is because it takes me out of 'my thoughts' and into feeling, which feels good, pretty fucking simple huh?

So what am I thinking too much about these days?
What I next want to be doing with my life and my energy, all sorts of philosophies, spirituallities, and me wondering What in Gods holy little Name is going on here on this planet and in this particular reality.
I think about whether I really want to be spiritually enlightened if there is no advantage to it, it is no better than this unenlightened state, and the process of getting there from here fucking SUCKS!
I was born super curious and will probably die the same.

The days of the week haven't meant a whole lot to me for a long while now, in the evenings I mostly like to chill out, music, reading, around a fire preferably. I love dancing on occasion, and drinking on the same the same schedule, but it bores me quickly, as do most bars and such. If I'm gonna go out dancing, I'm gonna pray my ass off for a good DJ.

Until I was 22 it would have been that I was a virgin, but now that that's over....I guess it would be that despite how confident, calm in all situations, collected and in-control of my reality I may seem, and how egotistical cocky I may appear, I strongly suspect that this reality is infinite, and entirely outside of my control. Fuck that huh?

Well, if you want to, duhh?!!
I would love it if everyone would try following their desires, and even just for fucking ONCE not act entirely out of their fears.