31 Asheville, NC
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My self-summary
I was born and raised in Asheville and I can't live without the mountains.

I appreciate someone with practical, handy knowledge: plumbing, carpentry, fire-building, mechanical, electrical. If you have the patience to teach me, even better!

And gardening! Can you garden? Then we will get along great. I get great satisfaction out of being elbow-deep in dirt with the promise of a shower afterwards.

I'm a feminist and believe in equality for everyone: social justice, animal rights, and respect for all regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, or economic background are essential parts of my being. I say this to weed out the rascists, homophobes, xenophobes, misogynists, dickbags.

I've got an artistic streak: writing, painting, crochet, pottery, and various unfinished DIY projects. Helping write the annual Bernstein Christmas Spectacular for The Magnetic Theatre is my favorite thing to do each year. I'm trying to get more involved in the theater as well as other writing endeavors.

I love laughing and comic books and animals and movies and pasta and adventures and mountains. Please take me on all the nature walks, I spend too much time indoors.

I have been described as "adorably enthusiastic."

Those all started with "I." How mundane.

Also, what I say on here isn't going to make that much of a difference. So Youtube videos it is!

The Muppets: Bohemian Rhapsody

Postscript: if you're not down with cuddles, smooches, hugs, head massages, regular massages, hand-holding, my hands in your hair all the time, or ridiculous noises when I'm content, you can go fuck off because I am an unapologetic cuddlesaurus.
What I’m doing with my life
Running around screaming, "CAN'T STOP, WON'T STOP!" Especially at my parents and the dogs.

Pride and Prejudice: Offending Lady Catherine

Every year I write for the Bernstein Family Christmas Spectacular. It's immensely satisfying to see something I wrote go through its awkward teen years, come alive on stage, and wow an audience. Like, butterflies satisfying.

I'm re-learning how to cook for myself, so if you're a whiz in the kitchen, teach me your ways!

In all seriousness, it's been a rough couple of years, but things are looking up. I really enjoy my job and everything else is starting to fall into place.
The Mountain Goats - "This Year"
I’m really good at
Dog whispering and discussing Batman. Try me.
The first things people usually notice about me
I receive many compliments on my smile and my laugh. I seriously have people ask me to come to their shows for my laugh. They want to record it and make it into a track they can play if I'm not there. I'm not bragging, this is a statement of fact. Okay, I'm bragging a little.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Agatha Christie's Poirot, Harry Potter, Terry Pratchett and the Song of Ice and Fire books (which I always call Game of Thrones). I keep my own tiny library, but woe, move through it very slowly.

Important notation: If you're the kind of person who venerates "Atlas Shrugged," you best keep stepping.

Current comics: Saga, Rat Queens, Chew, Stuff of Legend, Hellboy, Hellblazer, Batwoman.

Current Webcomics: Questionable Content, Girls with Slingshots, Curvy, Oglaf, Bad Machinery.

100 Greatest Movie Insults

Archer, Bob's Burgers, Daredevil, Jessica Jones, Gotham, Sherlock, Orange is the New Black, Drunk History, Key and Peele, Deadbeat, Once Upon a Time, The Hot Wives of Orlando (it's a spoof!), The Mindy Project, American Horror Story, Scream Queens, original The Office, Game of Thrones, Doctor Who, Community, Bridezillas (don't judge). I have an extensive MST3K vhs collection.

I've recently become obsessed with the podcast "How Did This Get Made?" and I may or may not be in love with Jason Mantzoukas.
Other notable podcasts:
Hello, from the Magic Tavern
Dead Authors Podcast
Again with This: Beverly Hills 90210
How Rude
Stuff You Missed in History Class
You Must Remember This
Murder She Podcast

The Dismemberment Plan - Time Bomb
OK Go - This Too Shall Pass
Tom Waits - Sea of Love
The Replacements - Unsatisfied
The Outfield - Your Love
(I make really excellent mixtapes)

Mouse Hunt
I, uh...I like cheese.
The six things I could never do without
1. Animals big and small.
2. A comfy bed. Re:cuddles.
3. My book collection and my movie collection. “If you go home with somebody, and they don't have books, don't fuck 'em.” - John Waters
Completely true. GTFO Illiterati.
4. Cloud-watching, star-gazing. Re:mountains.
5. Friends and family.
6. Laughter, it's like my bread 'n' butter.

Bonus: Results. And Inside Joke Theater.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Kyle Kinane: Believe in Yourself

Kids in the Hall - Sex Girl Patrol

Heathers, pretty much always

Also, why does no one else like horror movies? If they're bad, they're hilarious. If they're good, terrified cuddles and comfort makeouts.
On a typical Friday night I am
Falling down a superhero wikihole. I also like to go out to see plays and stand up comedy and enjoy an old fashioned afterwards.

I watch the sports sometimes. It'd be cool to hang with a dude that likes sports but isn't a dick about it. Do you like hockey? Because I'd really like to get into hockey.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
The Losers - Don't Stop Believing

Addendum: I have the most adorable bedhead.

After-credits Easter Egg: I'm not big on ginger or pancakes (I'm a waffle gal). I auditioned as an extra for Patch Adams; did not receive a callback. I talk to animals like they're going to talk back. Terry Pratchett's book "The Wee Free Men" helped me out during one of the most difficult events of my life.
You should message me if

You agree that women are funny
You don't just think you're funny, you actually are funny
You want to laugh at each other
You're smiling in your profile pic

You want to sing with me in the car.
You're the Keymaster.
You have a dog I can love on.