I could say that I'm easy-going and laid-back. I won't. It might be true, but everybody says that. Everybody says lots of things.

So, how to tell you about me in a format which can never come close to showing you the full depth and breadth of the amazing phenomenon that is me?

I'll start with something actually serious; I hate the phrase "You complete me" or any variant of it. Can NOT stand it. I'd rather find a complement. I'm already complete. And you should be, too. Another way to look at is is that I don't want to be needed but I need to be wanted.

I'm teaching myself to play harmonica. Sounds simple, but I quickly discovered there's a lot more to it than the actual ability to blow a note. Bends, overblows, overdraws, and that's all before you start using a mic and an amp.

I think Michael Buffer has the perfect job. Wear a tux a few times a year, introduce some guys, yell a catch-phrase, and cash the check.

Nobody can rock Daisy Dukes like I can.

Seeing me naked cures webbed knees, spontaneous eyebrows, and exoskeleton. There is scientific evidence to back this up.

I'm a recovering goatee-wearer, but I've been goatee-free for a while now. I go to my GA meetings weekly. I still scratch my chin, but that's just a stress reliever.

I am into fitness. Not as much as I'd like, at this point, but when it's going like I want, I run, swim, bike, lift weights, and often throw in different stuff just to break it up a bit. I try and take an overall approach rather than focusing on a particular discipline. Saying that, I am fully aware I'm much more suited for some things more than others.

I have superninja-like skills. All that means is I like wearing pajamas everywhere I go.

I taught Andy Dick everything he knows.

I hate cereal that floats. Seriously...I hate chasing around that last Cheerio or whatever with my spoon.

It should be obvious that I'm really popular on WoW,

Cheesecake, yo. Cheesecake.

All things considered, I'd rather be in the Cook Islands. Or the Maldives.

I'm looking for a new hobby since I gave up collecting leisure suits. I'm considering starting a band of land-based pirates. Start with a small house, then plunder the house next door. Then, we'll take the house and search for even more plunder on the high plains of rural Ohio. Eventually, we'll get so fat and rich, we'll have to commandeer a larger house and move on to other territory.

I'm looking for what most poeple are; adventures and a sense of 'GEE THIS IS NEAT!' about it. If I can find this in one person, great. If not, I'll keep looking and having fun.

I'm also teaching myself harmonica. Unless you play, I bet you didn't know that most of the players you hear in music have custom harps. Yeah, a lot involved.

What I don't like? Taking life too seriously. Filling out summaries.

Brevity. I see no sense in using 50 words to say what I can say in five. Some act like being overly verbose is an intellectual exercise; I think it's an exercise in narcissism. I say that and this profile looks awfully verbose.
Being demonstrative without being descriptive. You might think I'm being vague and evasive, but it's better to show you something about me rather than tell you about it. I can write a complete sentence. I can form a few of those into a paragraph. I can put paragraphs together to write a story or even a serious piece to be debated.

I don't know if I have a specialty. I've messed around with so many things that I have knowledge of much, expertise in virtually nothing. I can tell you I have no eye for art and no sense of what would be good or bad art. Why aren't velvet Elvis paintings considered masterpieces?

Depends. Are you following me or approaching me?

There are a few foods I want to try but haven't, but most foods are quite fine by me. However, if you put ketchup on your hot dogs, I must burn you at the stake for being a witch. I'm mainly a reader of sci-fi/fantasy, though I haven't read "The Hunger Games". I don't read like I used to, but that's another story. I like many forms of music, but I always come home to the blues.

Air, water, shelter, food, being self aware and cheesecake. Cheesecake can solve all the world's problems. True story.

I think, therefore, you are.
Why Luke had to face a Sith Lord and a Sith Master at the same time to become a Jedi. Kenobi didn't have to do that. I bet that green punk Yoda didn't have to, either.
I'd like to understand everything. Who wouldn't? But I'm ok with mystery in the universe. I do know how vast it is (conceptually) and how small a part of it I am. I can do just fine with not knowing a lot of things, even about myself. Attraction, for one thing, would often seem to go against what we SAY we prefer.
Why so many people seem to have a picture of themselves in their car, but I never see anyone in a car taking pictures of themselves. The wisdom of trying to find people to befriend or date using an algorithm that rates compatibility using answers in common. Seriously, is somebody just like you the person you want to spend time with? It seems to me that it would be just as valid to estimate compatibility using the way people order their hashbrowns at Waffle House as the metric. In sort of the same vein, does the person on here with the highest enemy rating to me have a secret volcano lair?
Problems both big and little. My own and big society-type problems. Trying to get a grasp on what the actual problem is, what things would look like without that problem, and how to get those two visions to meet. Half the time, this means figuring out how to make myself understood, not because I'm so damn smart (I am), but because I think most concepts are actually simple and I just need to find the right way to talk about it.

Smashing subatomic particles together. Working on a black hole.

I keep my secrets well, but...I am your father.
Also, I sneeze when I'm full.
I don't trust seafood unless I'm near the sea.
I hate cereal that floats.
Apparently, I have a lot of food secrets.

Confidence is sexy. Intelligence is hot. Be opinionated, and have reasons to back up your opinion. You might change my mind on a few things, who knows? Be straightforward. Don't be passive-aggressive. I don't mean you have to tell me everything about yourself. I think it's best if people keep a part of themselves FOR just themselves. Most important, be who you want to be, not who you think I, or anyone else, would want you to be.
You should ESPECIALLY if you know who Garrett Lisi is. Also, if you sound like Dr. Girlfriend. No, not really.
Truly, though, if you can rock a choker....I'm yours. I don't know why, but those drive me crazy.
I have a lot on my plate, and getting romantic is a difficult proposition at this time. Not out of the cards, just something that has to be taken very seriously. Dynamics and pressures are odd when it comes to such things. It's got nothing to do with recent breakups or anything like that, but I've got something going on that occupies my attention. If you're really curious and want to know more, go to http://www.helphopelive.org/find-a-patient/profile/index.cfm/patient/017DBC8F-E466-FF15-CE036D8544D6FADE