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29 Philadelphia, PA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 20–32
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 10:34am
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body type
A little extra
Strictly anything
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Graduated from space camp
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Okay), French (Poorly), Italian (Poorly), German (Poorly), Spanish (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Hello there! I'm Anthony, and this is my OKCupid profile for people to see and judge me by! Let's gooooo!

(Be warned: I want you dear readers to know what you're in for, so I provided a massive info dump. Do enjoy!)

I currently live in a crummy Northeast Philadelphia neighborhood. I will probably die here in a hail of gunfire.

I am super socially awkward, rather quiet, and painfully shy. I'm a triple threat. Be jealous.

With thay said, I still try to make contact with other humans. This profile wouldn't exist if I wanted to be a crazy hermit who lives in the moutains.

Alcohol is a good way to loosen me up, but I rarely ever drink. I avoid it if possible, but I'm not against it.

I spend most of my time either at home or at work. I try to go out more, but usually end up in fast food joints and malls.

Heck, the big reason I came to OKC was because I don't really know where to meet weirdo geeks like me in the real world. Nothing like that around me.

I don't drive. The very though scares me. I know that's a deal breaker for many, so if that's the case, I just saved you 5 minutes. You're welcome.

My two biggest passions in life are music and video games. They are not just hobbies to me. They are ways of life.

I'm not fat, necessarily. I have a bit of a belly and a kinda chubby face. Good for poking and pinching respectively.

I have a sense of humor that ranges from corny jokes to the darkest of humor. All accompanied with a Steven Wright deadpan delivery.

I have the body language of a cartoon character.

I've recently started to sometimes snort when I laugh. I don't know why...just started happening. Evolution, probably.

My hair cannot commit to one popular genre of music.

I should probably take the OKCupid questions more seriously.

Ideally, I would love to meet someone as awkward as I am. But I also wouldn't mind if I met someone who could pop my socially inept bubble. Either one is fine, I'm not super picky.

I should also mention that I'm not looking for some short term funnin' around. I'm looking for a long term partner in crime.

I'm totally for making friends, and I'm not the type to rush into things, but I do have a direction I'd like things to go eventually.

In the end, I just want to meet someone who'd like me for me. We don't need to have everything in common, as long as we enjoy spending time together doing whatever.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
By day, I'm working my glamorous retail job. By night, I'm solving mysteries with my hippie friends & their dog. Or sleeping.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Random facts, staying up really late, crafting mix CDs/playlists, making ridiculous meals, listening, alphabetical order, bad impressions, spending money, mumbling & keeping it real.

I'm really bad at: long division, smiling, Irish accents, taking compliments, communicating with words, making sense, poker, using an oven & taking directions.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Most of the time, I have crazy hair. I also wear shorts in the dead of winter. And people usually comment me on my choice of t-shirts.

Oh, and there's that whole quiet thing...
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I'm a total media junkie. Mostly music and games, but I love a good (or sometimes bad) movie, too. Very picky about what I watch, though. I don't watch much TV anymore, and my interest in anime has waned over the years, but I still have favorites in both.

Green Day, Less Than Jake, The Clash, Say Anything, Motion City Soundtrack, Beastie Boys (RIP MCA), The Wonder Years, Muse, Oingo Boingo, DEVO, Gorillaz, Mad Caddies, Pink Floyd, Alkaline Trio, Fall Out Boy, Mindless Self Indulgence, Arcade Fire, Off With Their Heads, Tom Waits, The Aquabats!...

(I feel I should also mention I have a fondness for classical and music from the Nineties.)

Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Shaun Of The Dead, A Clockwork Orange, The Ring, Pulp Fiction, Who Framed Roger Rabbit (RIP Bob Hoskins), Zombieland, Inception, Beetlejuice, The Breakfast Club, Ghostbusters, Inglourious Basterds, Wet Hot American Summer, The Matrix, Guardians Of The Galaxy...


The Simpsons, Futurama, It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, Dexter, Scrubs, Flight Of The Conchords, Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Seinfeld, FLCL, Fullmetal Alchemist, Neon Genesis Evangelion, Soul Eater, xxxHolic, BECK, Cowboy Bebop...

(I also love old cartoons. Old like from the 30's and 40's old.)

(Video Games)
Super Mario World, Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 4, Sonic The Hedgehog 2, Conker's Bad Fur Day, Silent Hill 3, BioShock Infinite, Rock Band 3, Saints Row The Third, Timesplitters: Future Perfect, Street Fighter Alpha 3, Portal, The Last Of Us, Marvel Vs. Capcom 2: New Age Of Heroes, Grand Theft Auto V, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Tetris...

(I'm also always down for a frustrating game of Monopoly or a horrible round of Cards Against Humanity.)

Scott Pilgrim, A Clockwork Orange, Gorillaz: Rise Of The Ogre, Ghost In The Shell...

(Yeah, I don't do a whole lotta reading.)

I like food, food tastes good.

As usual, there is a ton more to add in all those categories, but you don't want to read a great(er) wall of text. That's what the messaging option is for.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My family & friends, of course. My iPod is a must have. Air to breathe would also be nice. Food is also kind of important. And viewers like you.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Life. Squirrels. Life with squirrels.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I don't like this implication that Friday night is special. I've always preferred Tuesday nights.

Regardless, I'm either working or at home. If the planets align, I might spend time with friends.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm secretly a ninja. Keep that one in your pocket.

Besides that, I have nothing to hide.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If your idea of fun is marathoning films and/or kicking each other's ass in [insert fighting game here], then we should be talking already.

And If you can't resist belting out Wheatus' "Teenage Dirtbag" whenever it plays, regardless of the time or place, then we're most likely getting married. Deal with it.

But in the end, I'm just a nerdy guy with some (major) social quirks. A message wouldn't kill ya. Nothing to lose, something to possibly gain. :D

Oh, and if you happen to be some kind of comic book aficionado, message me right now! I've been thinking about looking into this medium I've largely ignored and need good recommendations ASAP!