The most cynically optimistic person you'll ever meet.
What I’m doing with my life
Writing. TV. Triathlons. Yoga. The Trevor Project. Running.
Pondering the uselessness of Twitter. Taking the high road. Making
it look like I'm taking the high road. Intellectualizing. Swimming.
Chauffeuring the drunk. Tough Mudder. Instagramming pictures of my
infant niece and nephew. Wonkette. Flying trapeze class. And, right
this second, House of Cards.
I’m really good at
Avoiding questions like this.
Not Making It About Me.
Unconsciously memorizing song lyrics.
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm taller than you thought, friendlier than you expected but then
slightly more caustic than I initially let on.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
David Sedaris, Chuck Klosterman, Nick Hornby, Kurt Vonnegut,
Augusten Burroughs, and The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao.
Election, Jackie Brown (and all things Tarentino), American Beauty,
North by Northwest, West Side Story, The Social Network,
Shakespeare in Love, Scott Pilgrim and Showgirls. 30 Rock, Parks
& Rec, Downton Abbey, Homeland, Archer, Happy Endings, Awkward,
Arrested Development, Rachel Maddow, South Park, Veep, Newsroom and
the gospel according to Jon Stewart.
On a typical Friday night I am
Packing my tri bag and setting my alarm to jump into the ocean on
Saturday. Trying in vain to talk over a dance remix. Watching
Monday-Thursday's DVR backlog. Wondering why I'm still at work.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I still, in the darkest, logic-free recesses of my mind, believe
Lohan's gonna make a serious comeback with, like, Golden Globe
nominations and an Inside the Actor's Studio interview (if James
Lipton is still with us). Just kidding, that will never happen. My
actual most private thing is that I obscure potential vulnerability
with pop culture bon mots.
You should message me if
you've had enough of Grindr for today; if you play beach
volleyball; if you can quote Arrested Development; if you know what
scorpion pose is; if you cried when Obama was reelected; if you can
handle frequent bouts of verbose philosophy and celebrity snarking;
or if you just want to go on a really good date.