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22 M Garden Grove, CA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 2:36pm
6′ 4″ (1.93m)
Body Type
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Has dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), German (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Go ahead. Look at the pictures first.

I'm tall, nerdy, and fairly witty. I write drunk and edit sober. I like shooting guns, barbecuing meat, slaying dragons, and all that other manly stuff. It would be cool to find someone to talk to about movies and TV. I firmly believe that people who hate the same things make the best partners.

-Our song has to be Africa by Toto.
-Our Chris Farley movie (yes, we have a Chris Farley movie) has to be Beverly Hills Ninja.

Everything else is negotiable.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm the vice president of sales at a mortgage firm.

I REALLY need to go back to school for my teaching credential. I tried being an adult for a year and it was horrible.
I’m really good at
making people think I know what I'm talking about.
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm enormous and I sound like some weird combination between Seth Rogen and Buzz Lightyear.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Harry Potter, The Old Man and the Sea, Mrs. Dalloway, The Crying of Lot 49, Out of the Silent Planet, The Return of the Soldier, The Quiet American, Anthem, Daisy Miller, Le Morte d'Arthur, The Closing of the American Mind, The Giver, A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man, Northanger Abbey, This Side of Paradise, Cold Mountain, The Awakening, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, The Stranger, The Fountainhead, At the Mountains of Madness, The Ascent of Money, The Roots of American Order, To the Lighthouse...I'll stop now.

The Big Lebowski, Full Metal Jacket, The Life Aquatic (or any Wes Anderson film), Best in Show, FDR: American Badass, A Night at the Roxbury, The Evil Dead (trilogy), Bridesmaids, Star Wars I-VI, Star Trek I-VI, The Master of Disguise (shut up).

Superheroes are good.

Arrested Development, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Eastbound and Down, Parks and Recreation, The Office, Adventure Time, Community, American Horror Story, Workaholics, Breaking Bad, Doctor Who, Rick and Morty, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Portlandia, Dallas, Bates Motel, Star Trek: TOS, Seinfeld, 1,000 Ways to Die, RedEye with Greg Gutfeld.

Any and all classic rock, esp.
-Lady rockers of the 1980s.
-Songs named after women.
-Love songs on the KOST.
-David Bowie covers of songs not originally by David Bowie.
-The lesser-known works of Survivor.
-The name game from American Horror Story: Asylum.

Like, if you haven't headbanged to Paranoid at least once, you need to take a good, hard look at your life.
The six things I could never do without
1. My grandparents (OGs)
2. WiFi
3. Pizza
4. Wine
5. Footnotes
6. * Soul mate I meet on OkCupid*
I spend a lot of time thinking about
how fun snapchat must be for hot people.
On a typical Friday night I am
getting off work, going home, and doing a backflip out of my pants or getting free beers from a sheisty tattoo artist.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have the Titanic soundtrack in my car.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–26
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
you'll twerk at my funeral and you think that episode of Family Guy where Peter turns everyone into Robin Williams is the most brilliant thing ever written.