I work for a megaconglomorate shopping chain and produce a webcomic in my spare time. More "facts" below-
I like wearing slippers but can't wear a dressing gown for more than half an hour.
My bedroom is a mess but I know where most things are (unless it's something I need for work).
I have five pets but four of them are the same species.
I once tried to start a conversation with a female, and it started the Gulf War. Since then I use carrier pigeons only.
Dogs are wary of me, since I remind them of themselves, but walking on hind legs.
If I ever come across as witty or eloquent, it's probably an evil doppelganger and you should call the police.
If found outside in the sun, please return to a darkened area and apply lukewarm water to the soles of the feet.
Currently working on a semi-autobiographical Homeric epic entitled- 'Why Every (Ginger) Woman I Ever Loved Was A Lesbian'.
If you can duet the entirety of 'Magic Dance' from Labyrinth with me, you receive a cool decoder ring and 3d glasses.
Things I am or Have Been Told I Resemble-
More sarcastic than a bag full of Chandlers.
Old slash grey.
An Epic-Level hypocrite.
Marginally amusing in the correct light.
Photogenic from the front.
Hilarious from the side.
Probably most definitely likely to not succeed or only vaguely try to.
Adaptive accent syndrome boy.
Fairly clean nails.... for a man.
You'd think by now any cogent individual in his thirties could deal adequately with things like rejection, affectation, numerous other 'ions. A life less lived.