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37 Columbus, OH Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 23–50
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Today – 1:51pm
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body type
Atheism, and laughing about it
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Working on university
Entertainment / Media
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids
Has dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), German (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I pour whiskey on him and inhale
cigarette smoke
and the whores and the bartenders
and the grocery clerks
never know that
in there.

I don't think I'm looking for anything right now. I keep this open to continue conversations with people who would be embarrassed to be my facebook friends, and because I like this profile.

I'm just one of many. Born into a generation without fathers, with no real masculine role model, in a time when gender roles are in flux anyways. It's made more confusing because traditional masculinity is frowned on. We learned about sexuality through the tapes we traded with friends, so we all ended up pervy men stuck in a state of constant adolescence. To this day, gender roles confuse me. I find myself wanting to be the masculine men that I see around me, but when I attempt it, I never feel comfortable in that skin. It's not who I am and no amount of trying will change that. Part of that feels like a crack in myself as a person. It manifests itself in a lot of small ways. I've never watched an entire football game in my life, that I remember. I just don't have that love of sports that seems to get beat into boys as a child. I didn't learn to make a proper fist until my life depended on it.

Sometimes I think some of us go blind into relationships, having never really have witnessed what a good one looks like. So we end up having no clue how to react when difficulties come in, or when it doesn't feel like a movie. So we just wander.

Some words to keep in mind. Headed in roughly the same direction, at roughly the same pace. I don't mind the fact that you are broken, because honestly, every last one of us over 25 on this site are likely a bit broken. This site has me feeling like the creepy old guy in the back of the club more and more every day. Life has just done one of those weird things where it completely resets, and all the sudden I am surrounded by new people whose names I barely know. It's a good moment, and I'm sort of trying to glue myself back together. I'll still be broken, but perhaps I won't leak at the seams nearly as much.

The things I want. I go into it a little more further down the page, but I want to add just a few things. I want someone who will stimulate me intellectually. Someone who will introduce me to new books, new movies, new music. new ideas. I want someone who will sit outside with me, and talk about the events that changed their life, the people, the music. THe moment when their religious beliefs were cemented. The things that make them who they are. I don't just want to know who that person is, I want to know why. I want to ask someone questions, and be geniunely interested in their answers, not just fearing the space between words. I want a connection that I don't believe exists, but I want to be proven wrong.

I've come to realize that my quest to amuse myself, well, it seems to come at the expense of people who take themselves too seriously. This unfortunately has left me with a lot of people who I thought might be interesting, but the second someone can't giggle when I say something ridiculous, I immediately write them off. It's horrible.

Music is important to me. Probably the most defining thing in my life. Sing to me, and you will own me.

I don't know what sort of picture this paints of me. I'm a dork, who thinks he is pretty smart. I like conversation, I like jokes, I like holding eye contact for a few seconds more than it is comfortable. I like affection, and give it easily. I'm blunt and honest. I can't hold a grudge to save my life.

I am a college graduate now with a real job in the real world where I earn real money, and I am finding this to help the dating game more than I would have liked to admit. Who would have thought? I'm sort of uncomfortable in the 9-5 world, and have been since I entered it. It's just strange to be surrounded by people who you have nothing in common with but the job you do, and trying to talk to them as if there were some connection otherwise. "What do you think off [local sports team]. Man, [local star on sports team] is doing well. Do you think they will win the big game?" It tires me out because I'm not great at small talk, and I sort of like to progress to more interesting and pressing issues very quickly. It's the same with dating and I wish I was better with it, but I'm not. But how can I worry about such things when the leather runs smooth on the passenger seat?

Here are the things I am looking for in another person. I want intelligence. That is imperative. Be smarter than me. I'll put you on a pedestal for it. Have some level of ambition, and some drive to create something more than a groove in a couch. I like creative people. I think talent is the sexiest thing on the planet, intelligence being the second sexiest. I want someone who enjoys music, and has a reasonable taste in it. If you listen to Godsmack and ICP, that's fine, but please don't expect me to not chortle when you do. I want someone with strong opinions who is willing to voice them to me This includes telling me when I am being an asshole, or telling me when I am wrong. I don't want a shadow. I am politically involved. I am very liberal. If you are conservative, it won't work. It just won't. Also, this is not completely important to me, but it's something I've often wanted and never had. I just want someone who will occasionally drink with me to dangerous levels, talking to me the whole time. I'm sort of bohemian. I'll likely never be rich I want to travel, and see the world more than anything.

Last, I have this absurd notion of romance and monogamy. I like the idea of marriage. I like the idea of saying to someone "When you are 75, and we are both grey and you can barely walk up the stairs, I will be there for you, and I will love you as much as I do this moment." I'm a sap, but I hope it's something I can find someday. I am a pessimist. But I hold out this belief that somewhere I'll find someone who will accentuate the good things about me, and help me work on my flaws.

I am the walking dead, hungry for brains, and post-punk-tastic

That last line, has been here for 10 years. From back in the day when you used to have to use 3 words to describe yourself. I keep it there for posterity's sake.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I work. A lot. My fantasy world where my degree will help me get a job in my field has come true. It's a shocking revelation. I live in a fantasy world where my scripts and movie ideas will be made by anyone but myself.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Pissing people off within minutes of meeting them. Seriously, It's amazing. I also give good advice, and I'm a good listener. I'm also good at taking things personally. Heck, I'm also great at being all together too honest in a profile, so that by the time it's done people see every hole in my psyche, and don't want to say hello. I also write stories involving characters that are all people I know, with different names. Being overly verbose.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm talkative, and reasonably charismatic. Or that I'm fat. Really, any of those.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books - Catch 22, most anything by Vonnegut, Dr. Seuss, 1984, Brave New World, Christopher Hitchens, David Foster Wallace (specifically infinite jest and Brief Interviews with Hideous Men)

If you start talking about how Zig Ziegler is your favorite author or "how to win friends and influence people" is among your favorite books, I will pull the fire alarm to escape your presence.

Movies... The Godfather I and II. Trainspotting, Apocalypse Now, Waking Life, Eternal Sunshine, Silence of the Lambs, Grosse Point Blank, Zombie flicks of all sorts, Say Anything, BEfore Sunrise, Lost in Translation, Garden State, Evil Dead, Evil Dead II, Mysterious Skin, A life aquatic. I just like well told stories, that do what they are meant to do. I don't like pap. Or Schmaltz. Will Smith and Tom Cruise need not apply.

Music - The Cure, The Smiths, Smashing Pumpkins, The Verve, My Bloody Valentine, The Clash, The Ramones, Husker Du, The Replacements, The Afghan Whigs, Twilight Singers, Dead Prez, Goodie Mob, The Coup, Immortal Technique, Black Star, Cocteau Twins, Peter Murphy, Joy Division, New Order, Interpol, Bjork, Tori Amos, Pj Harvey, Patti Smith, Bloc Party, Dredg, Stars, My Favorite, Concrete Blonde, Johnny Cash, m83, SKinny Puppy, Portishead, Headlights, Neurosis,, Jay-Z, kate Bush, Devotchka, Editors, Sigur Ros, Moonbabies, The National, The Secret History, The Gutter Twins, Mixtapes and Cellmates, Look, I like a lot of music. Plus, I love to be introduced to new bands. But if you come to me and ask if I've ever heard of Modest Mouse, I might giggle at you. I'm a music nerd. Oh, and I love hip hop. Love it. Not in the sort of white backpack coffee house hipster who loves Northern State and Mc Chris. I like a solid mix of underground and mainstream hip hop. If you can't handle this, leave me alone. Seriously.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My music collection, my camera, my plan to escape if zombies ever take over columbus, rightous indignation, your reaction when you realize I just said something that you believe crossed the line, and the laughter of babies when I make stupid faces at them. Stupid, stupid babies.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Ways to amuse myself, and ways to make other people smile. I'm all about the funny, and I adore smiles. The lack of courtesy in the world, and whether or not I aid or deter it. How I think my profile might be more interesting than I am. I don't think it's true, but it takes a little while to be this open with someone in person, and nervous small talk is difficult. I also spend a lot of time thinking about aging, and how youth has drifted off without so much as a wave goodbye.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Either working, or sitting around with friends wondering how we ended up here and if it's past the point of fixing.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
People seem to read this profile, and I'm not sure what they expect. I think this profile reads like someone who is a bit insecure, a bit stuck in his own head. Someone who likes to overthink and over complicate things. People read this profile, and write me and tell me it's great and they want to meet me, but this is me on a plate, sort of laid bare. I'm not sure what anyone thinks, but in meeting me, I have been significantly less successful in person than I have been with this profile. People project what they want to see in something, but it's all here. I'm a fat guy, who wants to be content with my life, but there is this yearning that absolutely refuses to go away, and I can't put a finger on what it is. I suspect it is the urge to connect with someone on a stronger level than just "hey we listen to the same music and like the same movies" nonsense. But I don't know. I get the feeling that if I met myself, I'd want to poke him in the eye.

I believe that all the fragile and fucked up people here are looking for someone who is going to help them put it all together. But that is not how this works. We are all fragile, we are all fucked up, so this is how we break.

I secretly believe that in order to be interested in me, you have to be absolutely insane. I've not had any proof otherwise.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You think zombie movies are hot.