My personality. I'll make you feel good about yourself and
Here's a story for you. If it resonates with you, let me
I keep reading and seeing women asking "where are the nice guys at"
or "are there any decent men left".
So, what happened to all the nice, decent guys?
The answer is simple: you made them disappear! Maybe you did that
without realizing it and if so, you're forgiven, but now you're
wondering where he is.....
If you think back, really hard, you might vaguely remember a
platonic "Mr. Nice Guy" pal who always seemed to want to spend time
with you. He'd tag along with you when you went shopping, cook
meals for you, stop by your place for a movie when you were lonely
but didn't feel like going out, or even sit there and hold you
while you sobbed and told him about how horribly the (other) guy
that you were dating treated you.
At the time, you probably joked with your girlfriends about how
that "Mr. Nice Guy" was a little puppy dog, always following you
around, trying to do things to get you to pay attention to him.
They probably teased you because they thought he had a crush on
you. Given that his behavior was, admittedly, a little pathetic,
and so that your friends wouldn't tease you, you vehemently denied
having any romantic feelings for him, and buttressed your position
by claiming that you were "just friends." By the way, where are
those friends of yours who laughed with you about "Mr. Nice Guy"
Besides, he totally wasn't your type. I mean, he was a little too
short, or too bald, or too fat, or too poor, or didn't know how to
dress himself, or basically be or do any of the things that your
tall, good-looking, fit, rich, stylish jerk of a boyfriend at the
time pulled off with such ease.
Eventually, your platonic buddy, "Mr. Nice Guy" drifted away, as
your relationship with the boyfriend got more serious and spending
time with this "Mr. Nice Guy" was, admittedly, a little weird, if
you weren't dating him. More time passed, and the boyfriend you
were so in love with eventually cheated on you, became boring,
drank too much or used drugs or maybe perhaps became abusive and
beat you? Or you eventually realized that the things that attracted
you to him weren't the kinds of things that make for a good,
long-term relationship. So, now that you're single again,
wondering, "What happened to all the nice guys?" you now know where
that "nice guy" went.
After you used "Mr. Nice Guy" for emotional intimacy without
reciprocating, in kind, after you laughed at his consideration and
resented his devotion, because you valued the aloof jerk of a
boyfriend and shunned the attentive "just-a-friend", "Mr. Nice Guy"
faded out of your life. Eventually, he took the hint and moved on
with his life.
"Mr. Nice Guy" probably came to realize, one day, that women aren't
really attracted to guys who hold doors open; or make dinners just
because; or buy you a Christmas gift that you mentioned, in
passing, that you really wanted five months ago; or listen when
you're upset; or hold you when you cry. He came to realize that, if
he wanted a woman like you, he'd have to act more like the bad boy
type of boyfriend that you had. But he couldn't do that because
he's true to himself. And so now that you're alone, and wondering
where you can find "Mr. Nice Guy" - think about this.....
Before you shun that boring email because he's too short, too fat,
balding, too poor, or dresses not so good - consider that he just
may be the "Mr. Nice Guy" you've been looking for.
"Mr. Nice Guy"