When I made my very first online dating profile, I fell into a trap. I found myself painting a picture. I wasn't lying about anything, but I was definitely trying to portray a version of myself that I thought would be the most attractive. For example, I put that I rock climb. I do rock climb, but I've only gone twice in the past six months. Under the right circumstances, I could see myself getting back into it, and that would be great, but it clearly isn't one of my passions, so it doesn't really belong in my introduction to strangers. (But it did make it into the introduction, so lucky you; you get to know about something that I kind of like a medium-ish amount.) Anyway, the point is that I tried to make myself seem more exciting. I said I usually prefer to stay in over going out, which is true, but it's a gross misrepresentation of my preferences. I'm just going to say it. Bars are stupid. Lots of them are anyway. If I go to a bar, it's to catch up with an old friend over a beer. It's not a filler activity for a weekend night. Night clubs make me have violent thoughts. Now I'm not saying I'm going to go to a club to pick a fight with a random douche, but if I do end up at a club, I will just stand quietly while I restrain myself from slapping people. Okay, sure maybe some people may genuinely enjoy the experience for some non-superficial reason, I just get nothing out of it. If you couldn't tell by now, I like my alone time. Maybe not just alone time, but small group time. Playing board games with a few friends is honestly one of my favorite ways to spend an evening. If somebody makes a crazy move to screw over another friend in the game, even if it's me, it can be absolutely hilarious. Those little interactions are the best moments. Why would I want to drown out my friends at a crowded bar? (But I'm done ranting about bars, so never mind... but really, let's just drink at home.)
I've been mostly negative so far. Maybe I should try to say something positive. After all, this is supposed to make someone like me, or at least think I'm not so unbearable that my super-sexy pictures can't make up for it. Here are the things I do in my spare time. Well I actually work a lot, so there's not a gigantic amount, but anyway. I try to play music every day. I've been playing guitar since I was 12 (hey, just realized that's over half my life. Woot.), so that's a way for me to just relax. I'm trying to make myself learn piano, but obviously it's not working very well. I've started logging each day I sit down at the keys for at least a half hour. We'll see if that stirs up any motivation. I also like to go running barefoot. It's really nice, I promise. I still have a mental barrier before each run like most other people, but I still manage to go on about three treks of three miles per week. I actually like it more when it's raining, like it is at the time of this writing. I'm usually working on one some book or another, but I go pretty slowly. It's usually a few pages before bed, and holy balls, those Tolkien books are long. Those are the things I set time aside for, so they must be my favorite things. Oh, I almost forgot about video games. Let's be real, they are a great way to relax. Plus, I have the excuse that I use them to keep in touch with my little bro back in Minnesota. Oh right. I'm from Minnesota. Some people think I talk funny. You bet, yer ass I do. One last interest: I do like to swing dance, but realistically, it's in the same category as rock climbing. I used to do it more, but I just don't for whatever reason. I tell myself I might if I had a consistent partner. There's a group of people at work who go every Wednesday, but SF is far away.
Like I said I'm from Minnesota. I like it there. I moved here for a job about six months ago. I reaallly like my job. I could do my job remotely, and at the moment, I think I'll head back to Minnesota within a few years. I do want to give the valley a solid two years or so. We'll see if I change my mind. Who knows? But yeah, since I'm not exactly sure I'll stick around, I don't know what I'm looking for. I'd like a long term thing, I suppose, but there might come a day when I'm like, "Come to Minnesota with me or stay here. Up to you." Nothing is set in stone, but just putting it out there.
Make up bothers me. I want to see what you look like. Also, I don't know if it's "makeup", "make-up", or "make up". I could have looked it up, but I didn't.
If we end up going on a date, it's probably going to be awkward. I'm not going to tell you how nice you look. Even if I do notice that you look particularly dashing, it would just be too cheesy and forced. But I'll still think about whether or not I should say it, and while I think about it, I'll miss something you said, and I'll nod and smile, and you'll totally know I wasn't listening. Then I'll be like "oh shit, she knows I wasn't listening." (I never know whether to put my periods inside quotation marks or not. A sentence is ending both inside and outside them back there, but '.".' just looks crazy. WTF am I supposed to do?) Anyway, we'll both be distracted by the fact that I wasn't listening because I was too busy contemplating telling you that you look pretty, and then there will be a nice long silence before one of us is able to come up with a new topic. After we get through that, though, we should be fine.
I forgot to finish telling you about the trap I fell into. That's what I get for attempting a stream-of-consciousness dating profile. My old profile got me messages and dates. There were some really great girls, but we just didn't click. The people I attracted weren't quite right for me, nor I for them. I guess that's just a natural part of dating, but we'll see how things go with a profile full of rants. And speaking of matches, I don't put much faith in the multiple choice questions on this site. Most of the questions are either trivial or too deep to be answered by filling in a bubble. I tried to write explanations for the questions I answered, and I really like reading other people's answers.
So in summary, I hate everything, and I might abandon you for a place that gets about 50 inches of snow per year. Come get it, ladies.
There are a few things from the old profile I thought worth keeping. First, I have a framed picture of Bill Cosby. Clearly a key piece of information.
And also, the list of things I usually find to be attractive. If you've read this far and still have some interest, that's a pretty good sign on its own.
1) Independence. I'm all for spending a lot of time with the girl I'm dating, but I don't want to feel like you'll have a meltdown if my phone dies. Hopefully you have your own aspirations too. You should have your own opinions. If we can take different sides of an argument and have an exchange, I find that extremely attractive. (As long as you're not just being irrationally stubborn, this ties into the next one.)
2) Intelligence. It's hard to define this since there are so many types of intelligence and most people think they are smart. I just want someone who enjoys thinking. The ability to entertain an idea without necessarily accepting it is nice.
3) Passion. Hopefully there is something you really, really, enjoy or care about. It can be anything. I just like to see fire in someone's eyes.