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25 M Ellensburg, WA

My Details

Last Online
Aug 28
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Likes dogs and likes cats
English, Russian

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Howdy, I'm Clayton. I like history and critical thinking.

I work two jobs, have a puppy, love music, silliness and vulgarity. I'm the youngest of four, grew up in the burbs, and am a proud-as-shit Eagle Scout. I've never worked above minimum wage, skip out on family events for bluegrass festivals, and like to write raunchy songs about heartache, woe, and country musicians. I have a BA in philosophy and a food handlers permit.

I love spicy-as-it-comes Thai and Indian. Sushi and pho. Tacos and Coors.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I will know the answer to this most definitely by never O'clock
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Tactless jokes regarding recently dead celebrities or global events (I'm looking at you, Mr. Williams) handymanning, film critiquing. I'm really good at dropping my iPod or phone.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Blue eyes, or the wispish facial hair.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Terry Pratchett, Quentin Tarantino, Robert Sheckley, Lovecraft, Red Elvises, Wayne Hancock, Richard Cheese, Hank Williams, Dale Watson, Doc Watson, Legendary Shack Shakers, The Cramps, Forest Gump, Girls, Big Love, Big Fat Greek Wedding, Sam Raimi, Arnold movies
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Google drive
2. Mom and Dad
3. Massages
4. Cool quotes from history: "anywhere a goat can go, a man can go. And anywhere a man can go, he can drag a gun"
5. Dental floss
6. Texas
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Empty stomach, sleepiness, meager paychecks, family.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Gigging, reading, walking the dog(she is the demon in the profile pic, and caused the nose gash), wrestling the dog, fighting off the dog, guitar, recording, reading, watching stuff, sleeping, pleasuring myself (and occasionally another), working.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I don't like The Beatles, pickles on my burgers, or opinions.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 25–40
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You don't give a shit about hop content. You like films because of production and scriptwriting.
You make fun of everyone and yourself.
You have boobs, and like boobly jokes.