Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I know what you're thinking. As you look over my Shaggy-styled mop
of a haircut and gaze into my deeply chiseled ass-canyon of a chin,
you realize that I am the most beautiful man you've ever seen in
your entire life. And you'd be right. From 9 AM to 5:30 PM every
day, excited women and aching girls arrive at my porch in swarming
droves, chattering and screaming among one another in nervous
anticipation while they begin forming a long vicious line
that rolls around my house in an impossible spiral. What could
these women want, you ask? They all come with one thing on their
mind: a quick, but telling, glimpse at my gorgeous baby-phat
birthing hips, and a hurried breath in my impossibly smooth and
crisp air as I walk by.
So anyways, that junk aside, I'm a pretty funny/ fun guy. Im not
really that funny actually, i just tell myself that to stop the
tears. I'm a writer and a beginner DJ, and I have a love for a lot
of nerdy/ geeky things. I have a pretty offbeat sense of humor, and
I don't mind showing that off to people. I don't understand why
anyone would want to be normal, since that's pretty boring, and
honestly, can anyone really claim to be truly normal?
I'm looking for whatever comes along really. A good relationship, a
short relationship, something long term, a new friend, you know,
just whatever floats by. I'll talk to literally anyone, so don't be
shy! That's my job. Don't take my job man.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Currently I'm traversing the multiverse. Did you know 6,000 years
ago Danny Devito killed Bruce Wayne's parents and became Lionel of
the Thundercats? Yea, the multiverse is pretty nuts.
But when I'm not skiing through the fabric of space and time I can
typically be found writing and being a geek. Actually, I only do
that stuff about 40% of the time. The other 40% is spent studying
how Nicolas Cage's face is powerful enough to actually change the
foundation of mathematics itself. What a guy.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I can write like a sir, if I should say so myself. That's my
biggest skill, perhaps my only skill. Perhaps skill my only
biggest. My phone tried correcting biggest to "bigfest."
Oh, wait, yea I'm really good at stuff and things. Many things and
stuff. That's good, right?
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm pretty good at making people laugh, which is good because one
of my favorite things is to see people smile. Humor is probably in
my top 5 things I'm looking for in a girl.
I have a very different and offbeat sense of humor from a lot of
people, and most of its just pure garbage. (My puns have been known
to hospitalize people)
Yea pretty much all my humor translate poorly onto the interwebs,
so I'm going to stop here... SIKE! This is a perfectly good
opportunity to drag my name straight through the mud!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I read plenty of comics, from Deadpool to Batman, and I love
regular books too like Eragon, The Road, Lord of the Rings, and
I watch all sorts of shows like The Walking Dead, and pretty much
everything on G4.
Also, /) (\
My favorite author in the world is Cormac McCarthy, followed by
Christopher Paolini. Tolkien and Rowling both deserve honorable
mentions too. My favorite artist is Greg Capullo. My favorite comic
author is Scott Snyder. Deadpool is going to be put on the list
because its what he would want, and ill also mention something
about kittens and grump because its popular or something.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1: liver and onions
4: my legs
5: macaroni and cheese
6: I hear that water stuff is important
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Relaxing either at home or at a friends, just letting the week come
to an end. Fridays are the reason weeks were invented. That's a
true fact right there. Straight from Wikipedia or something.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I write erotic fanfictions depicting NASCAR drivers having hot and
steamy sex with the Baltimore Ravens, all of whom are dressed like
the Power Rangers and speak Japanese.
Nah I'm just kidding. Could you imagine?
I can tell my amazing Internet profile building skills have
impressed you. I mean, aren't I just SO FUNNY? ( ~_~)
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Your interested in knowing more about me or just interested!
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