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Single Male seeks long walks around cliches, electronic acquisition, bad narrative writing and occasional tolerance of cooking disasters.

I have quick reflexes, some people claim that I am funny, and I have talked my way out of many more fights than times I've had to throw a punch. I do not drink, smoke, steal, lie, cheat, or misrepresent myself in order to gain favor. I run when I should walk.

I throw starfish back into the ocean, because it matters to each one.

Calcium is classified as a metal.

I'm desperately trying to get back into school. I locked my keys in there, and I can't drive home, otherwise.

terifulteas says: I AM back in school. And I might make games. Or large interactive sculptures in various yards, if materials and permits allow.

EDITORS

• terifulteas

Restoring order or causing chaos. Backbends. I'm excellent at listening and I can talk off your ear. My hobby of catching items that people drop leads to lower incidents of broken artwork.

I can fix computers, garbage disposals, books, and I keep a swiss army knife or leatherman on my person at all times.

terifulteas says:

ANSWERING MY PHONE WHEN PEOPLE CALL 1 800 BRENDIE

FOLLOWING UP ON REQUESTS FOR 1 800 BRENDIE

1800BRENDIE

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• terifulteas

I sleep with my eyes open.

Okay, that's not the first thing people notice but it's still shocking.

terifulteas says:

OR: Crazy hair, bad shirts, backpack of tools. So far no one has referred to this as a bag of holding, which is good, because that would be intolerable.

chinese_dentist
I have absolutely anything anyone could possibly want or need with me at all times, somehow.

EDITORS

• chinese_dentist
• terifulteas

Digging through the recent listing on Itunes: The Bird and The Bee, Just under 20 seconds of a single Girl Talk, track. Regina Spektor, Imogen Heap, Morphine, Of Montreal, Mountain goats, The Refreshments, Cake, Petra Haden, Bonobo, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Fatboy Slim, Dan Bern, Mindless Self Indulgence, Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers, The Pixies, The Shins, The Arcade Fire, VHS or Beta, The Beatles, The Ting Tings, Jason Forrest Yeah, I've got a big lack of indie street cred.

I make short films, yet somehow budgetary constraints have limited the number of movies I've watched recently, so here are some that just pop to mind when I'm trying to make a list The Salton Sea, Bringing out the Dead, Way of the gun, The Host, Brick, Alien(s), Trouble Every Day, Amelie, 28 days later, Dawn of the dead (both versions), Shaun of the Dead, Fargo, The Hudsucker Proxy, 2001, Apollo 13, Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, Spartan, Real Genius, Once Upon a Time in Mexico/China. If you're looking for suggestions go check out "You Suck at Photoshop" which isn't so much a movie or a TV series, closer to a serial.

As for books, there are too many to list for me. However, I'll throw down a couple that I look for in people's profiles. The grand daddies are of course Douglas Adams, William Gibson, and Shakespeare. On fiction, we have all of Dan Simmons' work, especially the Hyperion series, Neal Stephenson's work has gotten me through many a night at the airport, and a description I heard of his quicksilver series was "It's like the Sistine Chapel, so ambitious and wonderful you doubt it was [wrought] by human hands". I just finished up all of books Mary Roach currently has published. I've recently started digging Sherman Alexie. There are many others that catch my eye, but those are the ones I usually look for. For non-fiction, there's the obvious Dave Barry, Carl Hiassen does both fiction and non. Then there's Godel Escher Bach. Oh man, if you're reading this you should quit looking at silly lists and go grab a copy of Freakanomics. Hell, I'm going to quit updating this list and go read it. Unless there's another Eddie Izzard concert to be watched. How the hell do you pronounce Paulniuk?

Bill Hicks proves once again the great die young, while the mediocre and the evil continue to stalk the earth.

I'm not a big fan of this question. Instead, I'll admit to the following:

God was my co-pilot, but I crashed in the Andes and was forced to eat him.

I added bechonuru to my profile because my buddy in Portland P131252 did it for reasons I don't want to think about. It turns out it's some absurd sexual act. Who'd have thought?

OH GOD I'VE BEEN SHOT

How not to think too much about everything, dammit. Is that a good answer? I'll have to think about it some more.

Adipose, my secret name for a favorite dance I do. This word was made to be a noun for a dance move. Its syllables bounce on the tongue. Or diphthongs, or whatever.

If you enjoy linguistics, your style is appreciated. Notice that passive voice? Politics.

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• terifulteas

Coughing up lobsters

pictoz.com/thrown.avi

Dear Sir or Madam-

I was told you were conducting a study on arachnophobia. I believe (Though I'd never admit it to most people) that I have some form of that phobia. My reaction to spiders, even just pictures (If they're close ups of those eyes) is never what I'd describe as reasonable. Usually I'm instantly hostile, sometimes punching walls, or body parts when I've spotted one of them scurrying around. I'm always tense near them.

Though I believe I'm getting myself into a horrible situation, what is the nature of your study?

-Sincerely, *MyName*

Tied with that is probably my keeping of a blog. Terminalpacketloss dot com forward slash personal, and perhaps terifulteas is right and I'm an egomaniac.

You'd like to make a friend, or an enemy, or both.

You're daring.