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IAmABonobo

25 M San Jose, CA

I’m looking for

  • Guys and girls who like bi guys
  • Ages 18–40
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Today – 4:08pm
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Atheism
Sign
Education
Working on Ph.D program
Job
Education
Income
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Mostly non-monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm feminist, kinky, polyamorous, queer and just moved to San Jose from Palo Alto. I'd love to make some new friends or people to casually date. If you think we'd have compatible interests, then let's grab a drink and see how things go!

I like to eat and drink delicious things with people I like. My most treasured moments happen in someone's home, gathered around a table, with good food and great company.

I'm in a pretty great relationship with my live-in partner, so you should know that while I'm eager to go on dates, she'll continue to be my primary partner, even if you're my (boy/girl/awesome)-friend too!
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm working on my PhD at Stanford and getting increasingly nerdy about coffee.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Threes high score: 68052

Filling my gchat status and ordering interesting drinks at bars (recent favorite: the last word.) I'm a pretty solid cook and am always in need of new dinner guests.

I've recently gotten into coffee (my new obsession led me to buy a double boiler espresso machine). It'd be awesome to have a friend to nerd out with. Come over to my apartment and let's pull some shots!
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm hopelessly nerdy. Or my beard. I have a rockin' beard.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
My favorite author is Haruki Murakami, but lately I've been reading some John Le Carre novels.

Some favorite non-Murakami books from the last few years or so are The Log of the S.S. The Mrs. Unguentine, Invisible Cities and Why Orwell Matters.

I love finding new music, but there will always be a special place in my heart for hometown-heroes WILCO. Some other perennial favorites are the Decemberists, Andrew Bird, the New Pornographers, Neko Case and The Hold Steady. Lately I've been listening to a lot of Wye Oak, Tune-Yards, The Blow, Surfer Blood, Kishi Bashi and Moon Hooch. I also listen to Jazz, especially Dave Brubeck, Miles Davis and Charles Mingus.

I don't watch much TV, but I've really enjoyed Mad Men, Game of Thrones, The Sopranos, The Wire, Battlestar Galactica (both versions!) and (most importantly in my life) the West Wing. I recently finished Star Trek:TNG and would love to talk about it. My secret confession: I liked Dr. Pulaski better.

As far as movies go, anything written by Charlie Kauffman goes to the top of the list. But I also liked I Am Love, Ratatouille, Tokyo Story, Melancholia and anything from Werner Herzog, Errol Morris or Tarantino. I also liked Stories We Tell, but it made me sadder than any movie has ever or will ever make me sad.

Food is a big part of my life, and French food is my first love. But I also have a special affinity for Thai, Italian and English food.

I like new world spirits, old world wine and American Beer, especially barrel-strength Bourbon, Rye, Dark rum, French Wine, and Belgian-style beers from American brewers. I have an on-again-off-again relationship with tiki drinks.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My bike
Cuddles
Delicious Cofffee
Thomas Keller Cookbooks
Really Smart Friends
The Women in My Family
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How I can make my queer identity more a part of my life. And why so many bi ladies have biphobic answers to questions on here.

How can I get better work habits.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Usually working on academic stuff or lounging around at home. I keep an atypical schedule.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm very comfortable with sex outside of romantic relationships; sometimes making out can be a great way to tell a friend they're awesome.

I'm pretty into CBT.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I tend to click with people who have genders or sexualities outside of the norm. If you're cis, hetero and vanilla, we probably aren't going to click in a romantic or sexual way.

You think Guys with Fancy Lady Hair is awesome
- - -
A bit about where I'm at:

I'm in a poly relationship with a totally rockin' lady right now, but I'd love to have more people in my life. She is my primary partner, but I'm looking to meet new people for dates and casual fun. Take me out and show me awesome stuff in San Jose!

My interest in you decreases with distance and increases with match percentage. If you live in SF, Oakland or Berkeley, we'll have to be super compatible for us to have any chance of going on a first date. If you live closer by, I'm more willing to roll the dice and see if we click in real life.

I'm mostly looking for casual relationships and what the kids would call friends-with-benefits, but if you're seriously into food or drinks, message me right now.

FINALLY, to answer a question I get a lot on here: if BBC means big black coffee, then yes, I definitely want it in my mouth.