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ImprovAlpaca

48 M Saint Louis, MO

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 35–52
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 8:28am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
Trying to quit
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Sign
Gemini, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Banking / Finance
Income
$30,000–$40,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Has a kid, but doesn’t want more
Pets
Likes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I am funny and entertaining, almost to the point of being annoying.
I am kind an conscientious to a fault.
I am a terrible gift-giver. I fret over what exactly to get and what color or size is correct and it all works me into a frenzy, so I decide that instead of getting something you might want, I will get something you probably don't already have. Do you have a cheesy neon palm tree? Well, here you go. How about a megaphone--do you have one of those? You never know when you might need to direct traffic--here you go. I try, I genuinely do. I just happen to generally fail.
I like to prepare my own food. I don't like to cook, because cooking involved browning meat, dicing celery, baking and sauteing and generally making a mess out of the place. So food preparation around here usually involves cans of this, jars of that, thawed-out portions of the other (I will dice onions or mushrooms if I must), and it all goes in the slow cooker.
I like to perform both dramatically and comedically. I have done improv for over ten years now and have written several sketches that have been performed and even been funny. I would like to write a play someday, but I would have to think of something that would be interesting for 90 minutes, and I haven't quite held onto that idea.
I like vests, and I wear them a lot. Not out, mind you, but at work, I figure it's faster and less complicated than a tie. And I am trying to convince myself that I need a couple of pairs of shoes that I mostly just kinda want.
Me ears are kind of pointy. I used to get called Spock a lot in grade school, which was fine, but when it was time to play Star Trek, I always got stuck as Mr. Scott, which meant I had to stay on the ship and keep things running while Kirk and Spock and whoever else got to go shoot aliens. Frustrating.
I drive one of those small wagons. It's practical for when I want to throw all sorts of things in the back, but it's small enough that I can parallel park with ease.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I am recently single. There may or may not be issues with that; I happen to think that there aren't, but one can never be too careful, and complacency can be dangerous in these situations.
My job is fine. It provides the paycheck I need, and it permits me some latitude to do the things I like.
Speaking of which: I am in the early stages of an improv troupe. We are still figuring out one another; like I said, it's early.
And I am growing a beard for a play I am going to be in. I hope the director will see my face in a few weeks and ask me to shave because ITCH ITCH ITCH ITCH ITCH ITCH! (Update - beard is gone. Back to just my face.)
I have been working in the yard a lot lately. I go outside, emboldened with grand visions of a, b and c. I get an hour in and decide that just trimming the blackberry is good enough and has to be better than yanking the whole thing out. Then it's time to sit down, sip some Coke Zero, and admire my handiwork.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I am good at theater at improv. I am good at making people laugh. And I am good at working with somebody in a scene to see that it goes somewhere.
Trivia--I like the bewildered look from people when I know stuff, the more arcane the better. Often, I get asked 'How did you know that?' I just know stuff. It's how I am.
I usually press the correct elevator button; that's a plus, right?
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I have never asked them. If it were a caterpillar slowly making its way across my forehead, I suppose that's the first thing they would notice. My eyes, maybe. Not really sure. You would have to ask them.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Movies: Millions, What's Eating Gilbert Grape, American Beauty, Decalogue, Pulp Fiction, Open Doors (an Italian film about the death penalty), Exotica, Raising Arizona, the Mission
Books: Kavalier and Clay, Shipping News, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest,
Plays: Amadeus, Seafarer, Shakespeare (not all, but a lot), Ionesco, Beckett, Glengarry Glen Ross
Music: Hem, Marillion, Peter Gabriel, some Ben Folds, Josh Ritter, Lanterna, Iron & Wine, Ulrich Schnauss, Album Leaf, Mogwai, Richard Shindell, Tom Waits, Sufjan Stevens, Patti Griffin, Pink Floyd, Talking Heads, Steve Earle
Food: Italian, Latin, comfort food, and bar food. Nachos--it's not even a fair fight me against a plate of nachos. If you could put birthday candles in the middle of a plate of nachos, I think that would be a great thing.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Pen, paper, an almanac, creative people, a hat, some quiet time
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Lately I have been thinking about what I want to do next. I'm not overly goal-oriented, but I like the feeling of deciding to do something and doing it. Right now, these are tiny victories I am giving myself. I put corkboard in my daughter's room so I can hang the various things she brings home. It felt really great to do that. Admittedly a small victory, but one that I am relishing. This just gives you an example of the kinds of things I think about.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
On Friday nights, I am usually someplace playing trivia, eating food that I shouldn't, conversing lightly with those around me, and generally washing away the week.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
That picture above came from a play where I had to dye my hair. My actual hair color is salt and pepper, the majority of which is salt.
Also, I strained my back one morning killing an insect in my basement. It wasn't really an insect, I suppose, but rather one of those centipede-type things with legs about eight inches across that move like lightning. I see one of those about every eight months, and while they are crazy fragile--I think I could take one out just with a cross look or a stern talking-to--they still give me the willies.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you want to.