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24 Melbourne, Australia Genderqueer, Non-binary, Transfeminine

Genderqueer, Non-binary, Transfeminine

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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18–28
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Aug 22
Queer, Bisexual
Body Type
Mostly anything
Graduated from university
Politics / Government
Mostly non-monogamous
English (Fluently), French (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Hello! You're probably reading this profile because you actually want to know something about me, so I thought I'd finally update it. My name is Evelyn, I identify as genderqueer and use they/them/their pronouns. This won't really come up again on my profile, but if that's not cool with you then you can save yourself going any further.

I'm also polyamorous, which OKCupid still irritatingly does not include as a relationship status (despite their relative progressiveness on most things). I'm not using "open relationship" because it's not the same thing - I think it would be misleading to suggest that my "relationship" slot is filled. But I have two current partners, so if that bothers you then you shouldn't waste your time on me either.

I'm a fairly introspective and reserved person, and I don't like talking about myself, especially not publicly... so I don't know how much I can put on a public profile. I don't want to be one of those generic "I have no idea what to write here!" people, I just find I can explain myself much better in a personal conversation, or to meet particular prompts/questions that let me go into detail on relevant topics.

I tend to like just listening to other people, learning about them and how they think, rather than saying a lot myself... Until an issue I have a strong opinion on or a topic I'm passionate about comes up, then it's hard to shut me up.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I work in economics research, and I help run a queer gaming group. The former is more interesting than it sounds, the latter is more stressful than it sounds. :P
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Rambling on about a topic in terrifyingly obsessive detail long after whoever I'm talking to has stopped caring.

And listening. I'm a great listener.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Probably how completely awkward I seem to make every situation. Well, and that I tend to be pretty quiet unless I have something of substance to say.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Haven't read nearly enough since finishing school, but some of my old favourites would be anything by Douglas Adams (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, etc), the His Dark Materials series, The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time, and To Kill a Mockingbird.

Movies: Usually things that are a bit different to the norm. Fight Club, Donnie Darko, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Scott Pilgrim... Also Pixar and Disney animated movies, and a few anime films like Summer Wars and The Girl Who Leapt Through Time.

TV Shows: I'll have to categorise these, since I watch far too many.
Comedy - Arrested Development, Community, Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, Party Down, Archer, and anything else that's clever, original and does not have a laugh track/audience. I'm currently obsessed with Gravity Falls, Rick and Morty, and Silicon Valley.
Anime - Too many to name. Fullmetal Alchemist, FLCL, Cowboy Bebop, Welcome to the NHK, Baccano, Durarara and Steins;Gate are a few favourites.
Drama/Dramedy - Joss Whedon (Buffy/Angel/Firefly/Dollhouse/Dr Horrible), of course. Bryan Fuller's shows (Dead Like Me, Pushing Daisies) if they didn't keep getting cancelled so damn fast. Doctor Who/Torchwood. Chuck. Veronica Mars. Breaking Bad.

Games - This isn't actually part of the question! Disappointing, OKCupid. Anyway, I've found lots of favourites over the years, but I'd start by mentioning Mario, Zelda, Super Smash Bros, Phoenix Wright, and anything else awesome I can find time for. I like games that incorporate lots of puzzles, but are not strictly puzzle games - hence Zelda, as well as games like Portal and Braid, and Adventure games (LucasArts/Telltale/Double Fine).

Music: I'm bad at this. Don't really have favourite bands or genres. I tend to mainly listen to music that I've heard in some other context, like a movie/TV show/game. I'm somewhat obsessed with music used for storytelling purposes. Also, musicals are great.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I need six things? Is that meant to suggest there's stuff I can't do with just my computer and phone?

As far as things I tend to value go, there are video games, TV shows, my ability to think rationally and open-mindedly, and my friends.

I probably put friends last because, clearly, I'm an antisocial shut-in. But I still need them. Sometimes I'll start to go crazy if I can't get some quiet time by myself, but feeling alone in the world is far, far worse.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Everything. Over thinking is my speciality.

If there's one thing my mind spends a lot of time fixated on, it's probably the nature of society, stereotypes, labels, prejudices, social pressures, and anything else that relates to who we are and how we judge others. I like to talk about them in ways that help others open their minds to looking at things from a different perspective.

One prominent example of ways in which societal expectations and conditioning piss me off is gender and sexuality. I think labels are simplifications, and often poor ones - for example, while my profile claims that I'm "bisexual", that's a pretty big generalisation for something as complex and multi-dimensional as sexuality. I don't really know what my sexuality is, so I'm just figuring it out as I go. (Edit: OKCupid added new options for gender and sexuality! Hooray!)

Oh yeah, and I like ranting about random philosophical and psychological crap. Evidently.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Haha, this is a loaded question implying that I have a life. I'm not biting.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
[Insert sexual fantasy of your choosing here.]

I tell people private things once I feel like I can trust them.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You don't really need any special reason, I guess. I'm kind of indifferent. But I guess if I didn't want to communicate with people in some way, I wouldn't be here.

As far as active encouragement goes: if you're a decent, trustworthy, honest, open-minded person, then please go ahead and message me.

Oh, also, I like weird/different people. Don't be too normal. That's boring.

I do have dealbreakers physically speaking: no smokers and no beards. Perhaps not coincidentally, I have extremely sensitive senses of smell, taste and touch, so these things tend to become problems for me if I get too close to them.