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I am Evolving, Ecclectic, and Paradoxical

IntegralGuy

36 / m / bisexual / Single

Decatur, Georgia, United States

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Ethnicity White

Height 5' 9" (1.75m).

Looking For New friends, Long-term dating, Short-term dating, Activity partners, Casual encounters (sex partners)

Smokes Sometimes

Drinks Sometimes

Drugs Sometimes

Religion Buddhism and very serious about it

Sign Leo and it's fun to think about

Education Graduated from Ph.D program

Job Education / Academia

Income Rather not say

Kids Has children

Pets Likes dogs and Owns cats

Languages English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly)

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My Notes edit

My self-summary

When I was young, it seemed that life was so wonderful,
A miracle, oh it was beautiful, magical.
And all the birds in the trees, well they'd be singing so happily,
Joyfully, playfully watching me.
But then they send me away to teach me how to be sensible,
Logical, responsible, practical.
And they showed me a world where I could be so dependable,
Clinical, intellectual, cynical.

There are times when all the worlds asleep,
The questions run too deep
For such a simple man.
Won't you please, please tell me what we've learned
I know it sounds absurd
But please tell me who I am.

The above lyrics are from the "Logical Song" by Supertramp, but could be my life story. I am over-educated and overburdened with responsibility but am reopening to the magic of existence and to just being. I am in a process of figuring out who I am on multiple levels. What follows below is an attempt to describe some parts of myself, but I am a constantly evolving work in progress!

Sun Sign: Leo-Virgo Cusp. Rising: Capricorn. Moon: Aquarius. If you really understand astrology you can save time, there is no need to read any further!

Multifaceted might be the best word to describe me(but you might think crazy may fit better after reading this profile!). To quote Aldous Huxley "In an insane society,the sane man would appear insane."

I've never fit inside a box. In high school I played football, was an honor student with long hair who listened to metal and partied very hard on the weekends. Now I am a professor by profession. Epidemiology, specifically researching social disparities in health and healthcare accesss, is my specialty. I am currently teaching biostatistics(statistics applied to medical/health research). I have overdeveloped my left-brain even though I am naturally right-brain dominant. Fortunately I have just recently begun experiencing a reawakening of repressed creative energy. I have done some acting and have been drawing more and want to start painting more and take some dance classes when I find the time.

I am a spiritual, but not religious person. A combination of Zen and Tantra(it's not just about sex!) is what I practice, really it could also be termed "Integral Spirituality" which seeks to achieve full human development (physical, psychological, emotional, spiritual, social, sexual). To know God one must drop the idea of God and just experience life as it is; for it is all God and it is all good(even the bad stuff!). To me it is a miracle that there is "something" instead of "nothing", and not just "something" but beautiful complex beings that evolved (albeit over billions of years) from just hydrogen atoms!

I live to love and laugh and learn as much as possible and am looking for others who want to do the same! I am a very affectionate person with those I love. I love to hug and kiss and cuddle!

I have been a vegetarian since I was five years old, when I found out where meat came from!

When I am not working, creating, meditating, jogging, doing yoga, or hanging out with my kids I like to go out on the town, go for a hike in the woods(too bad you have to drive so far to find any!), or just hang out at home and watch a movie or play video games.

Personality-wise(in Myers-Briggs language) I am about 50/50 between introvert(I) and extrovert(E), very, very N(but try really, really hard to remain present in the sensory world!),a feeler but often appear a thinker(I try to reason things out logically, but ultimately make decisions based on my feelings), and a definitely a P(like to keep my options open).

Polyamory is a label that fits me but I prefer not to label my relationships, I allow them to be what they are and evolve into what they will; even lifelong monogamy if it manifests that way moment to moment.

Someone wanted me to define further what I meant by polyamory so here it is:

I actually don't try to live life from some definition and mindset of polyamory. What I mean by polyamory is that I am open to different levels of love, intimacy, and commitment and sometimes with more than one person at a time. I just don't like when a commitment to sexual fidelity feels more like it is being forced out of obligation or out of fear of hurting my partner's feelings. If I am being sexually faithful to someone it is because it is what I feel compelled to do at that time. What I do believe in is complete honesty to myself and others. I don't necessarily have an ideal relationship type in mind for the long-term either, but rather am open to the possibility of whatever may evolve, whether it be a primary relationship where we are allowed lovers on the side, or a primary relationship where we only play together with others, or a triad or group marriage where there is no primary relationship between two people. I am even open to the possibility of falling so deeply in love with another person that I never want to be with anyone else. Hell, maybe I'll be relatively single the rest of life and only have secondary relationships. It may seem indecisive, but I can't know what feels right until I experience it! As of right now I am not in a relationship, but am looking to relate to others! In reality I only probably have enough time and energy for one relationship at a time right now anyway!

I would love to find a woman into tantra(whether experienced or not) to make love to for hours at a time. Quickies can be nice too("Sex is like pizza. When its good, its really good and when its bad, its still pretty good." Yogi Berra)I probably shouldn't get involved in anything too serious right now, definitely not seeking that out...but if someone just sweeps me off my feet I am not going to resist!

I am not looking for someone to jump into the stepmother role for my children. If that eventually happens great! If it never happens great! I first and foremost want to nurture the individual relationship between adults! I have 50% custody so alone time is not an issue.

As far as being bisexual that is something I have experienced mostly in the world of fantasy, but am now willing to explore more in reality.

My gender polarity is relatively fluid, as I can at times be very directed and masculine and at others very feminine and nurturing. I often resonate to the opposite polarity of the person I am relating to. So if I am with a very feminine woman I tend to be quite masculine(not macho!). I am probably not going to wear a dress out in public, but I might wear a kilt(and I am not the least bit Scottish, LOL!).

For those that might be scared off by the listing of casual sex as something I am looking for:

I am not the type of person that goes to a bar for random hookups. However, if I feel a strong attraction to someone(usually on more than just a physical level) I am not against falling into bed with them in a relatively short time span. I also believe that erotic friendships(aka friends with benefits)can be an extremely beautiful thing. On the other hand I do not judge others(or myself at times) for wanting a deeper emotional or spiritual connection before exploring physical intimacy. I am actually not as big a slut as this might make me seem, but I do flirt a lot!

(I'm so excited I got the more mathematical AND more artistic award below! I'm not cocky! Just confident(yeah that's it!), less spiritual award? must be because I'm not a bible thumper!)

What I'm doing with my life

Trying to stay awake and present in whatever I'm doing! Trying to have as much fun as possible while also helping others.

I'm really good at

Procrastinating. Loving. Laughing. Acting. Cooking. Teaching. Daydreaming. Meditating. Flirting in an obvious manner. Writing long rambling descriptions of myself.

The first thing(s) people usually notice about me

My big brown eyes, my smile, my faux snakeskin cowboy hat and trench coat if I'm in that sort of mood.

My favorite books, movies, music, and food

Books: Ken Wilber and David Deida are my favorite authors at the moment. All-time favorite authors are Aldous Huxley and Herman Hesse. Also enjoy science fiction (Asimov,Heinlein) and fantasy. Yes, I have read all the Harry Potter books. The Alchemist, The Unbearable Lightness of Being, Siddhartha, Steppenwolf, Island, Shambhala Sacred Path of the Warrior.

Movies: good Sci Fi in general, Independent Films, Comedies(even quite silly ones!)
This will grow as I cut and paste from other people's profiles, LOL:

Fight Club!, LOTR trilogy, Batman Begins/ Dark Knight,Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Harold and Kumar, Most Ferelli Brother Comedies, Clerks, The Usual Suspects, The Fifth Element, Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels,Snatch, Sin City, Pan's Labyrinth

TV:don't watch much but like Californication and My Name is Earl

Music: It really depends on my mood: Classic Rock,Alternative Rock(Ben Folds Five, Bare Naked Ladies, Radiohead, Red Hot Chili Peppers),Metal(especially old school: Iron Maiden, Metallica, Megadeth; but also new like Disturbed, System of a Down, Avenged Sevenfold), Jazz (Bela Fleck, Al DiMeola), Classical, Chanting, Classical and Flamenco guitar, Electronica, Fusion/Progressive(The Mars Volta, Mr. Bungle)

Food: vegetarian. I love Indian, Thai, Mexican and Italian. A good new york style pizza! Good Beer,Wine, or Scotch(in moderation of course!)

The six things I could never do without

Family, Books, Music, "The Internets", Good Friends, Coffee, Meditation, and Breaking rules like listing only six things!

I spend a lot of time thinking about

What I really want to manifest in my life. Whether I should worry about manifesting anything or whether I should just accept things the way they are! The best is when I am able to think about nothing. The space between your thoughts is where enlightenment begins!

On a typical Friday night I am

There is no "typical" Friday night!

The most private thing I'm willing to admit here

Didn't I disclose enough above!

You should message me if

You are someone that may be interested in getting to know me. I love to meet new people that can teach me something new about life and love, and hopefully I can do same for them! Also if you just want to hang out and have some fun!

Especially message me if you understand and aspire to this quote:

“The integral sage, the nondual sage… Known generally as "tantric," these sages insist on transcending life by living it. They insist on finding release by engagement, finding nirvana in the midst of samsara, finding total liberation by complete immersion… Indeed, the whole point is to be fully at home in the body and its desires, the mind and its ideas, the spirit and its light. To embrace them fully, evenly, simultaneously, since all are equally gestures of the One and Only Taste. To inhabit lust and watch it play; to enter ideas and follow their brilliance; to be swallowed by Spirit and awaken to a glory that time forgot to name. Body and mind and spirit, all contained, equally contained, in the ever-present awareness that grounds the entire display.”
Ken Wilber

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