Onward, to the beautiful rambling word picture!
So I'm this guy, right? On my days off I wear pajama pants and drink too much coffee. I have arms, they're pretty cool. I really hope someone without arms doesn't see this because I totally just blew it.
If I'm wearing pajama pants I'm probably also watching movies on Netflix or playing video games on my ps3 using the hands attached to my wicked sweet arms. Sometimes I use my eyes to read a book. That's right ladies arms -and- eyes. I'm a keeper.
If I'm not wearing pajama pants (like, once a year), I'm probably out riding my bike or shopping for weird ingredients I haven't used before. I watch a lot of Chopped, and Central Market is pretty neat. I very much enjoy trying new restaurants. I'll also go check out concerts and festivals in Dallas. Sometimes I go to good bars and try out random craft brews. Someone should come with me while I do these things. They could watch me have lots of fun.
I have this house I live in. It's pretty sweet and conveniently located 30 minutes away from anything interesting. Wouldn't want to accidentally get mixed up in all that fun happening in Dallas. That would be dreadful.
There's this guy in the house who says he's my Brother. I think he's telling the truth. He's around pretty often. I think he might sleep in one of the rooms. I don't even know man.
There's a dog too. He's an absolute **stard but he's also adorable so I let it slide. I'm pretty sure he's made me go DAWWW in anger at least once. He's my favorite paradox. I take him to dog parks to keep his puptonium core from exceeding critical mass. That isn't pretty and it's the reason I had to move here from Chernobyl*.
I'm looking for someone I can be silly and go do things with. Someone who's independent and has their business all together. Maybe if that much goes well, I'll flex my gentlemanly muscles (that's a poor choice of words and I'm making the conscious choice not to change it) a bit, do some wooing and romancing. I totally have a metaphorical six pack in that regard.
I'm sorry I can't take a shirtless picture to show you my unfortunately metaphysical abs. I'm sure it would have earned me a lot of respect.
So maybe it wasn't in 3D, but I think that just about covers the basics.