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JSparverius

27 M New York, NY

I’m looking for

  • Everybody
  • Ages 18–99
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends

My Details

Last Online
Jul 22
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 3″ (1.60m)
Body Type
Thin
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Judaism, and laughing about it
Sign
Leo, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Other
Income
Relationship Status
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs and has cats
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
New Yorker born, and raised. Went upstate to Binghamton to get my degree in Political Science and History. While there I learned to appreciate good pizza, days without rain, and the power of love, and friendship... maybe I just learned about the first two things.

Some of my favorite activities are going to sporting events, theater, and museums( natural history is my favorite kind). One of my favorite plays is "A Comedy of Errors". Coincidentally my favorite team is the Mets.

I love warm weather. Especially the days where it's not quite hot enough for shorts, but not quite cold enough to need a sweatshirt. The days where you can just sit outside for hours shooting the shit with friends over a few drinks. NYC seems to go directly from weather that will give you frostbite, to weather that will give you heatstroke, so I've learned to really appreciate those few nice days we get.

Since this feels like a job interview question I guess I should also mention I'm proficient in Microsoft Word and PowerPoint.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Working part time as a tutor/sitter. Looking for full time employment as well. Attempting to read every Shakespearean play. Looking at one Wikipedia article, and waking hours later from a useless trivia induced coma. Finding a word to rhyme with orange.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Fitting in(to small spaces), reaching my goals(with the aid of a step stool), dunking(cookies into milk), I built a napoleon complex, but people kept bumping their heads on the ceiling. In short, I'm good at bad jokes.
No joke: I make a mean White Russian(along with a variety of other cocktails).
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My smile, my hair, my beard, the space above me.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Catch 22, Cat's Cradle, Song of Ice and Fire series, Richard the III, Titus Andronicus, The Brief and Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao, Dante's Inferno, Clockwork Orange, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, half of the Harry Potter series, Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk: A Modest Bestiary, Remains of the Day, Never Let Me Go.

Movies: War films that are really an indictment of war(Full Metal Jacket, Platoon, etc...), Kubrick(Dr. Strangelove is my favorite), Tarantino, old comedies(I've seen Duck Soup and Some Like it Hot multiple times), Pixar films(I love Wall-E and Up), and too many more too list here. The Shawshank Redemption

Channels I'm most likely to watch: AMC, USA, ESPN/SNY/MSG, Comedy Central, Adult Swim, HBO, Showtime, and Food Network

Music: Classic Rock/Pop- Beatles, Beach Boys, Four Seasons, Johnny Cash
Grunge/Hard Rock/ Metal- Alice in Chains, Pearl Jam, Metallica, Mindless Self Indulgence
Ska- Reel Big Fish, Streetlight Manifesto, Big D and the Kid's Table
This is what I mainly listen too, but I'm open to recommendations.

Food:A good slice of New York or Neapolitan style Pizza, Fettucine Alfredo, Penne with Vodka sauce, home made mac and cheese, pancakes( especially oatmeal or ricotta ones), any fruit that doesn't have a long yellow peel or the word "pine" in it, chicken(wings and drumsticks are a favorite), Flounder sandwich at Citi Field, Hamburgers( the rarer the better)
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1.Family/Friends/Cell Phone/Computer/Oxygen/Shelter/Water/Sleep/etc.- I couldn't do without any of these things, but I think an entire list made up of them would seem a bit dull.
2.Comfy Bed/Chair- Imagine having to sit in those school chairs for the rest of your life.
3.Kitties- I still don't know how something with rotting fish breath can be so damn adorable.
4.A good slice of pizza- New York, Sicilian, Neapolitan. I don't discriminate. (Yes, this is important enough to list twice in my profile).
5.Modern advances in medical science- the cause of, and solution to most of my life's problems.
6. Hot showers-Standing under the hot water makes me far more awake than any cup of coffee could.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Life, the universe, politics, past events, future events, and why I always think about these things when I need to go to sleep. If cats have existential thoughts.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Painting the town red, getting arrested for vandalism.
But seriously my weekends usually go one of two ways. I'm either eating challah and wine, or pizza and cocktails
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I've always been a pretty picky eater, but over the years I've become more open to trying new foods. I'm not yet at the point where I'm trying the most adventurous thing on the menu, but I am willing to try new types of cuisine.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're calm under pressure, you find puns funny, and can equally enjoy a quiet night watching a movie or a night out exploring the city, or a night spent in some other dimension which is neither in or out, and might be the fever dream of a mad man.
It would be nifty if:
You can name the last year the Mets won the World Series
You know who Dr.Zoidberg is (and you just made his scuttling noise in your head).
You have a favorite musical and can sing a song from it.
If you like to use the word, "nifty" in everyday conversation.

Dear reader,
If you're reading this you've gotten to the end of my profile. And if you've come this far, maybe you're willing to come a little further. You remember that message button at the top of the screen, don't you? I could use a good woman to share my time with. I'll keep an eye out for you and the scrabble board ready. Remember, reader. Messaging is a good thing, maybe the best of things and no good thing ever dies. I will be hoping that you know which movie I got this from, and I hope it made you smile.

Your friend,

JSparverius