Short Version: I'm 21, bi, and looking for a sweet, affectionate and smart girl to join the coolest couple in the Midwest.

Long Version: I'm currently in a relationship with an absolutely awesome guy, and we're looking for the right girl to join us. I'm a genuine bi-sexual. I'm not "experimenting" or something like that... I'm a confirmed bi-girl, who's attracted to women AND men (not that I'm judging anyone who's still experimenting and finding out about their own sexuality or anything). I just wanted to clarify that what I'd really love to find is a girl who's also bi, and is as comfortable around me as she is around the penile-enhance part of this relationship, James.

I'm in my last semester of an education degree, and hopefully I'll be teaching little kids next year. Yay! :-D I'm a bit of a dork, and have a habit of running into things. I often say awkward things at exactly the wrong time. I love Golden Girls, and I don't care who knows it. I want to BE Betty White when I grow up. I don't really like to call myself a girly-girl, but... the truth is I LOVE girly stuff. And anything small. Small stuff is, de-facto, cute stuff. I don't care what it is, if it's small, it's freaking cute.

I absolutely adore make up, and would probably become a makeup artist if I wasn't afraid of spending the rest of my life without ever finding a paying job. I spend what borders on an unhealthy amount of time watching youtube make up videos.

I love ice-cream, Disney movies, and warm weather. I can't stand to have anyone touch my belly button (what are you doing in there anyway? There's nothing in there for you!! Get out!!). I want longer hair, but I'm too impatient to let it grow out. I sometimes sleep with my mouth open. And I love zoos.

Yeah, so... I think that pretty much sums me up. ;-)

As for James - he is the most absolutely awesome guy in the world. No, really. Cross my heart and hope to die! :-) He's handsome, super-smart, hard-working, and incredibly funny and sweet (edit: after reading this, he said that my description seemed "pretty fair", but that I shouldn't forget to mention that he "smells of vanilla, aged leather, and a good horse". ..... ..... o_O .... I don't know where he got that crap from, but I'm going to tell you right now - if he smells like vanilla it's because he snuck one of my cookies and HE NEEDS TO STAY OUT OF THEM, the only thing he even owns that's made of leather is his shoes and those definitely aren't something you want to go sniffing, and I'm pretty sure he's never even been within 30 yards of a horse. What he /actually/ smells like is burberry cologne.). But uhm... his overly-optimistic assesment of his own smell aside, he really is perfect! We have a truly amazing relationship, and we'd really love to find someone else to bring in to that.

We're pretty open-minded as far as what we're looking for. You don't need to be a complete bookworm, though you probably should have read at least one book in the past year that wasn't published by Harlequin. You definitely should not have more hair on your upper lip than James does. You don't need to be a beauty queen, but we'd prefer someone who doesn't frighten small children when she smiles.

Our ideal girl is someone can be immature and fun (laugh at my poop jokes, damn you!! Laugh I say, laugh!!!), but know how to have a mature relationship without unnecessary drama. Oh, and uh... someone with a thing for leather cuffs and blindfolds would be nice. But, eh... we can talk about that later... ;-)

Also, we're looking for someone who's interested in a long-term situation. We're not exactly rushing into anything, but I mean, we want to find the right girl, who's going to be interested in developing something that lasts. So if you're just looking for a one-night stand, we probably aren't the right couple for you.

Unless you're Mila Kunis. Are you Mila Kunis? Because if you're Mila Kunis... Exceptions can be made. O_O

"What I'm doing with my life"? Really? Wow.

That seems like a pretty heavy question for a dating profile. One minute I'm answering questions about my favorite books and what I like to do on a Friday night, and the next thing... BAM! "Quick, what are you doing with your life!?! Because you're not getting any younger, you know! Why can't you be a doctor, like your cousin!? And would it kill you to wear a little more make-up when you go out? And when was the last time you called your Grandmother?"

Pretending to be asleep. Seriously. I'm a freaking CHAMP.

is that my profile is obscenely long.

The Walking Dead! We're absolutely fanatical fans of that show. :-D Also, Dexter. And Law and Order: SVU.

I tend to prefer romantic comedies, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE Disney films. Super-hero films are also a lot of fun. American Dad and Family guy are both brilliant. James is into horror films, and a big Woody Allen fan. He's also crazy about Futurama, and My Name is Earl.

School. I definitely spend a lot of time thinking about school right now. My boyfriend, of course. And how much we'd both enjoy a girl to hang out with. I spend a lot of time thinking about books... I love to read. Make up, and my hair (yes, that's right. I spend a lot of time thinking about make up and I'm not ashamed to admit it. So what? Come at me, bro...). I spend a lot of time thinking about my family. Leather cuffs and blindfolds. And maybe Golden Girls.

Hanging out with my boyfriend! We'll occasionally go out, but more often, we're at home. We're pretty good at entertaining ourselves. ;-)

I liked Twilight.

AND The Hunger games.

Yeah. That's right. I liked them. Both.

Stop judging me! :-P Yeah, that's right. I see you. Yeah, I see you there. Judging me. Judging away, with your Judgy-Judge McJudge eyes, on the judger-express from Judgetown on the way to Judgeyville.

Well just remember... didn't like, Jesus or Moses or Batman or someone say once, something about "cast not the first stone, you'll put your eye out, kid"?