I am a 23-year-old beard who has been out of college, working hard, and playing softer.

I. LOVE. Computers. Computers are way too important to this generation, so I try to learn as much as I can about them, all while using them to make my livelihood. To be honest, I'm surprised that I haven't turned into one by now, although this would make me more of an Adam Jensen type and I never asked for this.

Outside of computers, electronics, and most things technology, I've the sharpest penchant for silly Internet, movie, television, and book references in that order. YouTube? Definitely. Reddit? Does a narwhal bacon? If you have the intellectual inertia to summon some ungodly reference from more than a year ago, then you're just like me, which, by proxy, means you're awesome.

Furthermore, I'm a sucker for adventures and random assorted trips to various places I have not been, so long as I can muster up the energy. This includes graveyards, beaches, shopping centers, restaurants, parks, houses, mansions, castles, lakes, forests, mountains, so on and so forth. I love these almost as much as I love sleeping-in on Saturdays, which probably explains why it's so damn hard for me to go on various adventures.

I graduated from college about a year ago and I am currently working as a Software Engineer. I find the work really enjoyable and challenging. In fact, it's so enjoyable, that I've lost all temptation to make those long commutes to the city.

I was considering applying to a Master's program, but life has become so manageable that I am far less interested in a Master's and way more interested in working on cool stuff close to home.

I definitely want to have a family in the future (and play video games with my son and get made fun of by my daughter, or vice versa because gender roles). A lot of the money I am saving today is going toward this goal.

...speaking, writing, and thinking. I pride myself a great deal on delivering clear thought and reason to others. My Long Island accent typically doesn't show through on paper and I would like to think I have a decent vocabulary (purely from Diablo II). Public speaking is terrifying, but for some reason I tend to pull it off with great confidence.

I am a factory of hypothetical situations and I typically find myself generating many "what ifs" for unfortunate bystanders on a daily basis. I spend too much time thinking of the most trivial and ridiculous things -- and I absolutely LOVE IT. I also clap notoriously loudly.

I have acquired tremendous coordination in anything involving a keyboard and mouse (or a controller). I love volleyball even though my only advantage is a BEAUTIFUL serve. I have no respect for the rules of mini golf and I have no problems displaying very POOR coordination with soccer, frisbee, football, and anything that's not running or swimming.

That being said: I love making a fool out of myself.

When unshaven? My beard.
When shaven? My bea-- Glasses.

After someone has run a rigorous analysis on my physical appearance, they should notice that I speak with a lot of English. And after that, they might notice that I have a very bizarre, contextual, and macabre sense of humor.

Books: Lord of the Rings, The Count of Monte Cristo, Far North (Books where a hero endures against some great force)

Movies: True Grit, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Dark Knight (Anything with an epic villain or charismatic lead)

Shows: MythBusters, Louie, History, Science (Either laugh my ass off or learn my ass off)

Music: Soundtracks, Blue October, OK Go (Thunderous, emotional, or just plain old awesome)

Games: Thief, Super Mario, Portal ("So, how are you holding up? Because I'm a potato..." *slow clap*)

(1) Glasses that are sleeping-in-them proof
(2) A Watch
(3) Friday Night Outings
(4) Constant Reorganization
(5) Horses
(6) People who say things like, "This is true"

...the future. I spend an awful lot of time thinking about what my next job might be or where to go in my career. I also tend to think about the ways things can be changed or done differently. It adds a terrible amount of work and critical thinking to my daily routine, but it leaves me in a constant state of improvement. Beyond that, I am usually looking for something to watch, something to play, or a good laugh, wherever I may find it. But trust me: it's a real pain in the ass to find.

...out with my friends! I have a fairly stable circle of friends who have been going out every Friday night for a few years now. We have a system in place where, each week, a new person is assigned to selecting a place to dine and something to do. This has been pretty successful in keeping us active and in touch with one another. It also leads to a fury of inside jokes, friendly antagonism, and terrible humor.

Tyranny over democracy! At least when going out with friends. I'm not much for the indecision of: "What do you want to do?" "I'm not sure, you pick." "No, YOU!"

I have plastic surgery in one of my eyebrows.

You're utterly diabolical.