In layman terms: A schizophrenic lunatic, an evolutionary mishap, a high-powered mutant probably never meant for mass-production.
(So limited time only! Act now, order today! Offer stands while supplies last)
Despite my acknowledgement of reality, a universe with neither godly beings nor supernatural phenomena to take comfort in, a life with no deeper genuine meaning than reproduction and survival, I still greatly favor my existence and wholly enjoy whatever experiences it brings, especially the unpredictable ones. I’m content with what it is and I’m profoundly loving every aspect of living.
(Well alright, ALMOST every aspect of living then.. Perhaps I wouldn't mind the removal of wasps. Or degeneration. It's possible that I'd prefer a world without natural calamities. Maybe I don't like the aspect of living that involves not being able to become a space pirate.
Most of all I'd love if you didn't go around messing up my quasi-poetic hyperboles, damn you! The constesting of quasi-poetic hyperboles has left me in despair!)
I’m attracted to eccentric personalities and I’m curious as to how other individuals interpret and perceive this world, which leads to an ample amount of open-mindedness and natural interest in people, but ultimately I’m socially selective as I prefer close intimate bonds compared to numerous, more superficial, relations.
But it is not just the understanding and delight of people that captivate my mind. My interests are numerous and I derive happiness from a wide scope of recreation. Science and its counterpart fantasy fascinate me, I enjoy physical activity and social interaction extensively, and the substantial assortment of movies, books, games, music, shows and series available in this day and age is the prime source of my entertainment.
Despite what one might think after reading this overly grave and self-absorbed, self-advertising, self-important self-summery, I take great pleasure in humor and general carefree behavior and banter. For as long as one can keep life in the right perspective, one will find hilarity and absurdity, the two are intimately connected, in many a situation.
And with that, I conclude what might be said to be a fairly zealous, but evidently much too serious, and probably mind-blowingly boring, take on the essence of my personality..
Now that I behold my creation, the whole thing strikes me as annoyingly self-centered, despite the fact that an earnestly written self-summary can be nothing else, and not to mention senselessly prolix! Alas, verbose writing is one of my many vices, though I'm sure that if you've made it this far, my dear reader, with your sanity intact and spirit undiminished, then you're probably not impartial to a little bit of inane rambling.
Thus you must not hesitate to contact me, since, if nothing else, I can promise you a lifetime's supply of rambling, inane or otherwise frivolous, with a hint of soberness on special occasions.
(Soberness not guaranteed, batteries sold separately, all purchases are final.)
.. And yeah, it's meant to be slightly obscure (or was it obtuse?) references. Screw credits, they'd ruin the fun.