"To say that another person can make you happy is to do yourself a great injustice. It's the same as saying someone else has control of your emotions. But anyone who is in touch with their soul knows it isn't true. The feeling of happiness comes from within you, not from somewhere else. It's up to you, and only you, to control how you feel." --Wise Man, from "Wokini"
Things that add joy to my life:
Snuggling, Dancing in the rain at night, SMILES, sharing affection, apple orchards, Laughing, Nature, small hyper dogs playing with large clumsy slobbering ones and cats who could care less, the fresh scent of a foggy morning, warm hues of setting suns that define intricate tree-branch silhouettes, diving straight into a body of water without testing the temperature, SKINNY-DIPPING, Intimacy, the point in a kiss at which you breathe in rhythm, evoking That which sends electric pulses down the length of your spine and to the tips of your fingers, happiness and irony, pillows are great, but tummies are better, deep meditation and reflection, SUNLIGHT!! The reflection of the moon in a puddle, "Monkey Bites", Waking up early to see the sun rise and hear the birds greet the new morning, The "peepers" (frogs) in the evening, my 4-year-old nephew's goofy facial expressions when he eats lemons, GENUINE HUMAN BEINGS who admit and accept their animalistic perversions, TAKING ACTION, the human body and its infinite beauty, LOVE, and Cheerios.
Thoughts on Love and Relationships:
I am of the belief that it is simply not enough to say "I love you" in an attempt to express intimacy. Action is the fuel for desire and affection. Words fall on deaf ears if action does not echo them. Little things such as doing the dishes, massaging shoulders and feet after a rough day, listening and empathizing, leaving silly notes in odd places to be pleasantly discovered are daily actions that reinforce affection. Even household chores are daily opportunities to actively express, "I cared enough to do this, so that you didn't have to." Love is built on a foundation of little acts of dailiness.
Love, of course, starts within each individual. In order for me to love and respect a potential companion, she must first love and respect herself in both principle and practice. I do not seek to "complete" someone who is otherwise incomplete; rather, I seek to compliment someone who will mutually compliment me. It is important that our bond is one of positive reinforcement in which we encourage one another to achieve our individual goals as well as shared.
"If it don't feel right, bring it into sight!" Good communication is extremely vital to honest expression of love. My partner must be willing to openly express her thoughts and feelings. I am not willing to play the guessing game anymore. Happy and healthy relationships exist as the result of open dialogue; the blunter, the better.
The most important characteristic I look for in a woman, or anyone for that matter, is selflessness. I am a giver for the sake of giving; it gives me great joy to know that I have a positive influence on people. I desire a companion who possesses this same quality. I have been in too many selfish relationships that have ended with me feeling used. So, it would be nice to be with someone who gives back a little bit.
Importance of political views and education
It is also very important that our values are in agreement. I am very politically well-informed, progressive and active, and I require that my companion at least share my views on a basic level. Of course, there is always room for discussion and debate. I am not a stubborn person and am more than willing to consider alternate viewpoints as long as they are informed (credible sources). My views are based on a strong foundation of human rights and true equality. Above all, I treasure education and integrity; with greater knowledge comes an obligation to act accordingly. I am forever a student of the world, constantly seeking knowledge in all that I experience. My companion must possess this same passion for life.
Note: If you consider Fox News a credible "news" organization, don't waste your time contacting me.
Sex in an long-term relationship:
It is important that my companion, at the very least, enjoy sex. I understand that it is sometimes difficult. As an occasional participant in a group called Actions Against Rape (AAR) at school, I am well-aware of the impact past traumatic sexual experiences can have on one's psyche. As aforementioned, my companion must first love herself before she can love me. I am not a psychiatrist, and consequently, I would prefer not to engage in a relationship in which I must act as one.
Regarding the act itself, I am an incredibly passionate lover. The physical manifestation of love is one of the most beautiful expressions of affection in relationships. Nothing quite compares to the intimacy shared in that moment, when two separate bodies embrace and become one. Few things give me as much joy as pleasing my partner; I absolutely love it. And as one who once considered pursuing a career in sex therapy, I will state that I am also quite knowledgeable (interpret as you will). I am also very open-minded and fairly adventurous.
I am fun and quirky, inspired, and energetic!