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37 Chattanooga, TN Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18-37
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 8:04pm
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
5' 7" (1.70m)
Body Type
Average build
Not at all
Agnosticism and laughing about it
Post grad
Doesn’t have kids and doesn’t want them
Has cats
English (Fluently), Italian (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I moved to the Chattanooga area from New Jersey a couple years ago, for reasons I'll explain if you ask. I'm a wannabe writer who works as an agent of the government, but not the cool kind. More of an office functionary. I spend most of my waking hours reading and writing comic book scripts. My hobbies include roleplaying (games, not the good kind), collecting comic books, riding my bike, and having philosophical discussions. I probably come across as a geeky guy but I do try to be more than just defined by a social caste. Still, I get along much better with strange people than normal ones, and my sense of humor is dark on good days. I do have a soft spot for animals, and even ran a cat rescue for awhile, though now I'm down to two cats that I love like my kids.

Also, I'm something of a cranky old man well ahead of time. I am not the biggest fan of Facebook, Twitter, or text messaging. Despite this, I am not a technophobe. I mostly just dislike how freely everyone eschews their privacy in favor of instant access to others. I think being alone sometimes is a good thing.

That last bit is probably stuff I shouldn't admit, but I figure putting the stuff out there that might turn people off is one of the better ways to be honest on a dating site.

I am weird, megalomaniacal, and morbidly funny
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I guess the most interesting thing is I just wrote a novel. It's due out later this year. Sadly, it doesn't pay the bills yet, so I am still working for the state of TN, in the capacity of helping people. It's not the worst job but it's not the best, either. Mainly, I try to keep my life odd and avoid the tedium of adulthood by doing various art and performance stuff like comedy and short films in addition to writing, which is my main passion.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Making people laugh, if they can deal with the offensive things I say. It's not that I mean to be offensive, mind you, my humor just skews that way. I'm also pretty good at listening, and occasionally even at giving advice. I'd love to say I'm really good at writing, though that's for the critics to decide. I'm a decent enough tutor and editor, though. I wouldn't call myself an expert or anything, but I can read most people a lot of the time, and I can almost always make animals like me.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I wear a lot of unusual t-shirts, and occasionally get referred to as the t-shirt guy. I have really thick, wavy hair that grows entirely too fast. And a lot of people comment on how quiet I am when they first meet me, and how talkative I am after I open up (yes I know that's a cliche but it's true in this case).
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Favorite books: Flowers for Algernon, Mother Night, Ishmael. Anything by the Poe, Hawthorne, Coleridge, Jonathan Swift, Kurt Vonnegut, A. Lee Martinez. And of course I read lots of fantasy and science fiction, good or otherwise. Favorite movies: Clerks, Shawshank Redemption, Princess Bride, Casablanca. Favorite music: Dream Theater, Rush, Joe Satriani, Weird Al, Dethkok, Within Temptation, Lacuna Coil, Sabaton. Anything that involves progressive rock, heavy metal, classical, or instrumental. Favorite food: I love Italian food, which befits my heritage, and of late I'm attempting to become more open-minded in my food choices. I do have a sweet tooth as well. I must regrettably admit that I would eat a Cadbury omelet if it existed. Favorite drink (non-alcoholic): Milk. I drink entirely too much of it. This would explain why I have no cavities and have never broken a bone, but not why I'm only 5'7. All those commercials lied to me! Favorite drink (alcoholic): I don't actually drink alcohol so I don't know why I included this one.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Something to write with. 2. My massive collection of books and comics 3. Good debate. 4. Milk, as previously stated. 5. Smoke bombs, to make dramatic exits. 6. A pocket watch, for style.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
The worlds inside my head that are trying to get out, the state of the world and all humanity's various foibles, and yeah, I'll admit it, girls.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Usually watching movies or playing various games with friends. But I do go to art shows and concerts sometimes too.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm actually a secret agent for an international peacekeeping organization called PROTECT (People for the Reclamation Of Technology, Enterprise, Communication, and Territory). We use our vast resources to fight against the evil of...but I've said too much.

Or, I guess that I'm a big nerd. I can't hide it all that well, as you can see.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you like strange, hard-bitten creative weirdos with just a touch of social conscience and a talent for self-deprecation. I guess if you're looking for someone who is unconventional and will challenge you and make you think about things you normally don't, then I'm your guy. If you're not looking for someone who is just out for a stereotypical good time, that works as well.